We still had some cans of Agatha’s spray paint, and I painted “Mother of All Bombs” on the side of the contraption.
It took us about five hours to finish building the launcher. Brandon had pointed out MOAB actually stood for "Massive Ordnance Air Blast," but his brother said, “Don’t be that guy.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Brandon said. “...
2020-02-27 02:12:44 +0000 UTC View Post
The recap episode started with a close-up shot of Jack’s purple, veined, and uncircumcised dick, huge on the screen. The headline screamed, “Trapped! Meadow Lark and The Royal Court of Princess Donut in Peril!”
“Wow,” Donut said. “Yours isn’t nearly that big. Or oily looking. And it doesn’t have that hat thing.”
If looks could kill, the gla...
2020-02-25 08:52:00 +0000 UTC View Post
Chapter 38
The next several seconds seemed to happen in slow motion. Donut was the first to react. She jumped up, claws out, as if she meant to decapitate the elderly man. She pulled back at the last moment, instead pushing off his shoulder and sailing through the air, flying until she landed three platforms down.
Yolanda also reacted, just a fraction of a m...
2020-02-21 23:49:20 +0000 UTC View Post
Mordecai shrieked in rage. “Out! Out of my room!” He kicked at the monsters, punting them like oversized footballs out into the hallway.
“Gah,” I cried, jumping back. “Why aren’t they teleporting away?”
“They won’t until they attack,” he said. “Not on their own, at least.” He was scooping them up by the armfuls, tossing them back out ...
2020-02-19 21:28:21 +0000 UTC View Post
FYI these are going to eventually be die-cut stickers (Just the monsters, not the text all around them.)
2020-02-19 21:09:18 +0000 UTC View Post
All of my menus disappeared. My entire HUD snapped off. It was just like it had been when we’d been transported up to the production boat floating on the surface.
I just stared at the person, uncomprehending for several seconds. Are you kidding me with this shit?
It was a kua-tin. A female kua-tin. I remembered the massive carving on the doo...
2020-02-17 21:42:37 +0000 UTC View Post
I wasn’t dead.
I was deaf. I was blind. I was in a fuck ton of pain. I couldn’t feel my legs.
But I wasn’t dead.
I gasped for air. My health was blinking, the lowest it had ever been. My eardrums had been blown out. My entire face felt burned, my eyes included. The pain was overwhelming, like hundreds of claws pulling at me from diffe...
2020-02-17 10:44:24 +0000 UTC View PostThe whole shebang so far in .mobi and .epub.
2020-02-14 23:08:43 +0000 UTC View Post
Krakaren Clone!
Level 10 Neighborhood Boss!
First off, this isn’t the Krakaren. This is a Krakaren. For every one that is killed, Krakaren Prime births two more.
Part of a collective mind intent ...
2020-02-14 23:01:26 +0000 UTC View PostA couple quick retcons from the previous chapter....
I added a mention of the discontinued Rev-Up Smoothies in the brochure.
I changed the name of the fairies from the Ouph to Laminak. I also rewrote the last couple of paragraphs of Chapter 32. Instead of going over all the changes, I just added them here before Chapter 33.
Chapter 32 (Ending) ...
For those of you awesome folks who are Celestial Benefactors, I wanted to drop a note of how much I appreciate your support. When Dungeon Crawler Carl eventually becomes an actual book, I will shout out each of you in the book. In the meantime, I have attached a review copy of my book Kaiju: Battlefield Surgeon. I will have audio review copies coming soon, too, once the audio emerges.
I'm going to do a series of faux advertisements like the attached using mobs from different floors. I already have some planned out with mobs you guys haven't met yet, but if there are any specific ones you'd like to see (Danger Dingoes, Bad Llamas, etc.,) Let me know.
Not bosses yet. Those are coming too.
Again, chapters are a little rough. This one might change a bit based on how the next chapter finishes up.
Chapter 32
Time to Collapse: Five days, ten hours
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As we approached the quadrant with the stairwell, we could now see that there was a tutorial gu...
2020-02-10 20:57:57 +0000 UTC View Post
The plan is to have artists draw some of the mobs from the dungeon and add the images to the story over on RR. If there are any particular mobs you guys would like to see, let me know, and I will prioritize them.
2020-02-08 22:34:47 +0000 UTC View PostThis is the farthest chapter I have that I'm comfortable sharing. So we're not quite two-weeks ahead of the curve, but we'll get there soon. Again, the editing on these my by abysmal. I apologize in advance for that.
Brandon and crew were still bringing people into the safe room as the next episode premiered.
Right when the show started, the timer fina...
2020-02-08 22:27:37 +0000 UTC View PostAttached to this post is the complete story up to this point in both epub and mobi format. The last couple of chapters need more editing. I will try to update this every week or so with everything that has been written so far.
If there's another format you prefer (pdf. etc.), let me know.
Chapter 30
Floor Two
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“There’s nobody on my list,” Donut said. “I don’t have any followers yet.”
We’d been on the second floor for about five seconds. Thankfully, Brandon and his crew hadn’t come down yet. We still had two hours unti...
2020-02-08 22:16:16 +0000 UTC View PostQuick Note. My goal is to get these chapters well ahead of the content on RR. Since this is new, it'll take a few days to pull ahead. As such, the level of editing is going to be less than optimal.
Chapter 29
The lights of the studio flipped all the way on, and the audience snapped away. The studio remained, but the bleachers were just gone. Ode...
2020-02-08 22:09:20 +0000 UTC View PostThis is the first post. There is no content yet. Everything should launch shortly. If there’s anything specific you’d like to see, please let me know!
2020-02-07 22:27:39 +0000 UTC View Post