Fortune, Fate and Firearms - Ch4

What…the…fuck

Catra's mind was a spiral of thoughts she could barely identify. Emotions were too hard, so she stuck to the facts.

The rebellion took their horses right from under their noses. Motherfuckers.

The leader, riding a white stallion with a star branding - known to the locals as She-ra - was within Catra’s reach. Catra had her gun pointed at She-ra, ready to end all her problems and get out of this hellhole for good.

The blonde leader of the rebellion had shown her pretty face for the first time in history and it was Miss Greyskull. Catra recognised her even weeks after the party because her visage haunted her dreams every night since.

Miss Greyskull recognised Catra and rightly guessed that Catra would hold her shot if Catra knew it was her. Catra played right into her hand and held her shot just like Miss Greyskull thought she would.

Catra heard the pink haired woman yell "Adora", she was sure of it. The blonde hair and blue eyes of Miss Greyskull was feeling less like a piece of the puzzle and more like the whole damn picture.

Adora…her Adora was alive? Could it be possible that this blonde beauty was Miss Adora Greyskull? She looked so much like Adora it was haunting, but she hadn’t thought for a second that Adora might actually be alive and thriving without her. If that woman was Adora then she had really grown in these last 10 years.

Just…

Wow…

It really was Adora. Catra applied that new information to the interaction she had with the blonde at the party and realisation slowly boiled her blood. Adora was not only alive but she knew it was Catra when she touched her. She knew and she said nothing. Catra growled deeply in her chest, her anger and pain mixing into one dangerous feeling.

Betrayal.

Adora was alive all this time and she let Catra mourn her. Adora didn't even try to find her or try to tell Catra that she was alive. She discarded Catra like a piece of trash at the earliest opportunity just like Weaver always said she would. Adora didn’t care about Catra and she never did.

Catra was going to make sure Adora regretted that.

“Get those horses you idiots, bring them back or don’t come back yourself!” Catra yelled and those who stopped scrambling without direction and rushed to the stables to find horses.

“Amateurs,” Catra growled , she leaned down to scratch Duchess behind the ear affectionately. “My good girl, not even Adora is good enough for you,” Catra whispered, spite dripping from her fangs as that long dead name slipped from her lips.

“Boss, what should I do?” Scorpia asked as she ran over. Catra barely looked at her.

“Where’s your horse?” Catra asked in a low growl. She had no patience right now and even though she knew it wasn’t Scorpia’s fault she was not happy with her.

“Uh…gone, she got spooked,” Scorpia confirmed and Catra sat straight again to glare down at Scorpia.

“Then find her,” Catra said carefully holding in her anger. She didn’t want to snap at Scorpia but she was barely able to hold back.

“Right! Got it,” she said, running to the stable to try to find a replacement horse.

Catra growled as she took the bag of coin from her pocket and put it into her saddle bag for safe keeping. She counted the money to make sure she took the right amount back to Weaver at the end of this mess. She didn’t need Weaver on her ass about coins. The horses weren’t her responsibility but it would still fall on her if they weren’t found. Catra wasn’t holding out hope to find them, if the rebels took them into the high country then they would be lost to them for good.

When Weaver gave Catra her assignment she was also given a long list of jobs she had to complete on top of tracking down She-ra. Like that one job wasn’t already hard enough. Now, her simple task was made monumentally harder by the woman herself.

“What a joke,” Catra said, as she thought of the blonde woman on her white star branded stallion. Adora was She-ra, and Adora was alive. Not only was she alive, but she was the enemy now. She was the Horde’s number one enemy no less. She had the biggest target imaginable on her back and her bounty could easily set someone up for life.

What a fucking idiot.

Well Catra wasn’t going to clean up Adora’s mess and she wouldn’t try to convince Adora to change either. She didn’t care. Adora didn’t die so that means she chose to abandon Catra. Adora betrayed Catra and Catra was angry. Catra wanted to find She-ra so she could leave this place, but now she had another reason to find her. Catra wanted Adora to know that she wasn’t helpless anymore. Catra was the fastest draw in the West and she didn’t need Adora. Adora would recognise her skills when Catra captured her and handed her over to Weaver on a silver platter.

I’m such a fucking liar.

Catra’s head tipped back and she looked up at the dark sky as the stars twinkled back at her. As much as she wanted to deny it, if she found Adora right now she would sooner kiss her than hand her in to Weaver.

Not a great resolve to have. No one knew where to find She-ra anyway. It wasn’t like Catra could walk into their hideout, hidden somewhere in the dangerous Rocky Mountains and ask to speak to the infamous outlaw who was worth millions.

What have you gotten yourself in to, dummy?

Catra looked towards the horizon where the horse thieves disappeared. She breathed deeply and all she could smell was the dry dusty air, and the smell of horses. Adora’s scent was long gone.

Catra was somehow more annoyed that the horses were stolen than the knowledge that Adora had betrayed her. The anger was overshadowed by the relief she felt knowing that Adora was alive. It was pathetic that she was still pining over a woman who never wanted her, and wouldn’t even after all these years. At least in her imagination, Adora could never really reject her. It was a terrifying thought, Adora was alive, and could very well want nothing to do with Catra ever again. It was enough that Adora was alive. Catra could leave her on the unreachable pedestal she placed her on and watch her live her happy life. Adora was too good for Catra, she could never deserve her.

Adora made Catra feel young, in the stupid way. In the way that wisdom could never touch. She felt like a teenager again, sneaking nervous glances at her best friend at the swimming hole, or stumbling her way through their first kiss. Yeah, Adora made her stupid and stupidly, she was still in love.

#

Catra helped to search for the horses. She was angry that this was going to be blamed on her but she wanted to look for any reminiscence of She-ra. For her mission, no other reason.

It was a fools errand in the end. The horses were long gone but one good thing came from it. Scorpia found her horse. Tilly was an older girl and she didn't like to run much so they found her standing near the entrance to the mountain country where she refused to go further up the trail.

Scorpia was delighted to see her horse and gave her many hugs and kisses while Catra went into the start of the rocky path to scout. She didn't get far before she turned back, it was already dark and she didn't want to get lost in there or worse, have Duchess lose her footing.

Scorpia and Catra returned to Horde town and Catra was forced to report to Weaver. Catra handed over the pouch of money she collected and could feel Shadow Weaver’s glare through her mask.

“I am disappointed Catra, She-ra is your responsibility to deal with,”

“I know,”

“You let her get away with our horses. I thought you learnt something when you were west,” Shadow Weavers voice dropped with disdain as Catra clenched her jaw to keep her mouth shut. It didn’t matter what Catra did, Weaver always used that tone with her. Nothing Catra could do was good enough for her.

“Don't worry about She-ra, I'll find her.” Catra said firmly. She was going to find the blonde, but she hadn’t decided if she would tell Weaver when she did. She would rather see the whole Horde crumble than to give them Adora. They looked out for each other, or at least Catra did.

“See that you do. You’re dismissed,” Weaver said and Catra turned and left the room. Closing the heavy door behind her before she stalked down the hallway. She passed the common room which was filled with rowdy people yelling and drinking into the evening. Catra hated the smells and noise of that room, so she headed for the door to get some fresh air.

The firm footsteps behind her told her that Scorpia had left the common room to follow her outside. Catra went up the steps to the ground level and pushed her way into the cool night.

“How did it go?” Scorpia asked as she joined Catra outside in the dimly lit lamp of the barracks porch. To Catra’s left was the wanted board outside the Horde Town saloon and Catra silently stalked over to it. Scorpia followed, no doubt hoping Catra would open up about her terrible experience with Weaver.

When Catra arrived before the wanted board she was met with the poster for She-ra and other rebels. The drawings weren’t that clear, but whoever drew She-ra’s had gotten her eyes just right. Adora’s eyes were clear and piercing, partially hidden under a hat and her face covered by a scarf. She hadn’t really looked at the wanted poster before but now she felt foolish. She should have known those eyes. Even older and tired with the weight of the world on her shoulders, those were Adora’s eyes.

Catra grabbed the bottom of the poster and ripped it off the wanted board. Her ears flicked back as she heard Scorpia shuffle her feet.

“What are you doing?” Scorpia asked, her voice not judging but coloured with confusion.

“She-ra’s mine,” Catra said, injecting as much venom as she could into the words but even to her ears they fell short.

“If you say so boss” Scorpia said and Catra glared at her. No one was going to hurt Adora if Catra had anything to say about it. Catra had hope that she could convince Adora that this wasn’t there fight and they could just leave. Catra knew it was never going to happen, Adora always wanted to do the right thing and be the best, so why would this be any different. Adora was stubborn, and Catra was selfish, there was only one way this all could go but a girl could dream.

#

Horde town was a handful of buildings and an old mining bunker underground. It had the essentials, like a church and a saloon but the saloon was full of idiots that Catra knew, so she avoided going there.

That was why Catra went to the next closest town to drink, Erelandia. Close enough that they respected the Horde but far enough away from Horde town to hear rumours. Catra was here seeking any information she could find about the famous rebellion and their slippery She-ra.

Catra wasn’t a fan of drinking alone, but she didn’t want Scorpia to draw attention to her. Scorpia looked like she could brawl and Catra didn’t need that kind of target on her investigation. So, she sat, watching the saloon girls dip in an out of rowdy laps and refill drinks as they passed. Catra denied their interest when one pretty redhead approached her, Catra had sharp eyes in dark rooms and she could see what was really happening. No one would miss a few coins from a heavy purse and the girls deserved the money for the filthy way some people treated them.

The redhead looked disappointed but Catra instead pulled out a coin to offer her.

“How about a trade of information instead?” Catra asked and the woman bit her lip before she accepted the coin. She dropped the coin into her shirt where it clinked against many others before she smiled.

“What do you want to know?”

“I’ve just come back into town, and I’m looking for my friend, could you tell me if you’ve seen her?”

“Yeah, what does she look like?” The woman asked, dipping her voice to match Catra’s soft tone.

“She’s a looker, big hips, soft curves, about my height and vibrant pink hair,”

“Oh! Yeah, I’ve seen her around town, I think she owns a farm nearby with her husband. Does that sound like her?”

“That sounds just like her, do you know where her farm is?”

“Not sure exactly, she frequents the general store often enough though, I think its to the north maybe?” The woman said, tipping her head curiously.

Catra nodded her head slowly and slipped out of her chair to smile a the woman before she produced another coin to offer to the redhead.

“Thank you, you have been most helpful. For your trouble,”

“No trouble at all, let me know if you need anymore help” the woman said taking the coin and winking at Catra before she moved on to another patron.

Catra left the saloon and crossed the street to dip into the general store. The woman behind the counter looked up and smiled. Catra glanced around, picking up some sugar cubes for Duchess as a treat before she approached the counter.

“Howdy,” the woman said all bright smiles and pretty eyes.

“Howdy, I’m new around here and I was looking for a friend of mine, could you tell me if you’ve seen her?”

“I can do that, what does she look like?” The woman asked, ringing up the sugar cubes and Catra put two coins on the counter to pay twice its price. The woman glanced around, pocketing the spare coin before she opened the till to put the other away.

“She’s kinda hard to miss, bright pink hair, about my height,”

“Oh! You would be speaking of Miss Glimmer Moon, she owns a farm north of town. She comes into town often to give us produce but she also likes to chat with the preachers daughter from the Light church, they get on gabbing all day sometimes,” the woman said with a laugh “The way she whispers with that woman, you would never believe shes a married woman at all!” The woman said, with a playful grin. Catra grinned back, putting on the charm just a little.

“That certainly sounds like Glimmer, she has always been a free spirit,” Catra said, lying through her teeth. The woman looked curious and interested.

“Oh really? Do you think she is getting some on the side? That would be a scandal!” The woman said, obviously excited at the prospect.

“It would, wouldn’t it,” Catra said tapping her nose and picking up the sugar cubes. “Better keep that between us,” Catra said in a whisper and she smiled.

“Oh, of course, my lips are sealed,” the woman said, and Catra smirked.

“Good, you have a lovely day,” Catra said and the woman parroted her words with a small blush on her cheeks. Catra left the shop and walked back to Duchess who immediately started sniffing around her pockets for the treat she could smell. Catra gave her one before mounting up and walking Duchess down the street to the church. Inside was a frail looking blonde man with his hands clasped together over the glowing fountain in the centre. No sign of the young woman.

Catra decided to come back another day, if she was lucky, she might get Glimmer and the daughter in one visit. She had plenty to go off for now, and if she was lucky, her snooping would get back to the right ears.

Catra didn’t need to find Adora, she just needed Adora to know she was looking for her and Adora would hopefully come to her.

#

The sweltering summers and freezing winters were something Catra would always hate about the south. The desert changed on a dime from boiling days to freezing nights and Catra didn’t appreciate the dry dusty air.

Scorpia trailed Catra into town, deliveries to the general store were being made in the early hours of the morning but pink hair was annoyingly absent. Church was in session so Scorpia and Catra slipped into the pews at the back and listened to the droning sermon.

Catra hated church, she didn’t believe in all that holy light and bullshit that Prime was spouting but that didn’t stop every town from needing a place to worship.

Catra could remember playing in the church with Adora and the preachers son in Horde Town when it was too hot to be outside. Kyle was a boring kid, lanky and scared of everything with a mop of blonde hair that he cut himself, poorly. Adora liked Kyle, but she liked everyone and someone had to keep Kyle out of trouble when he was so accident prone. Adora liked to be a saviour and clearly that complex only grew with age.

Catra didn’t like to tread on holy ground, it made her fur itch and filled her with anger and spite. Catra wouldn’t be here, if it wasn’t necessary and thankfully Scorpia’s presence meant she didn’t have to be overly pleasant. Based on Scorpia’s doe eyed expression she also took a liking to the preachers daughter who he introduced as Perfuma.

Perfuma looked nice enough, sitting in the front row listening to her father speak his words of wisdom and helping those in need of light by offering a coin to dusty travellers so they could make a wish in the green pool of water. Catra hated the sight of the green liquid, it smelt horrible and she couldn’t imagine what that colour did to the water itself. She hoped to never find out.

At the end of the sermon the small group made a line to offer their coin to the fountain and making a wish to Prime. Catra and Scorpia hung back at the end of the line and when it was their turn Catra let Scorpia go first. Catra watched as the last of the people left the church as Scorpia flicked her coin into the water and put her claws together to make her wish silently. The old frail preacher left into the back of the church, leaving his daughter to finish the last respects.

Scorpia stepped aside, so Catra could do her wish and she pulled out a coin from her purse. Catra made eye contact with the Perfuma before she flicked the coin into the pool of green liquid.

The slender blonde’s smiling face drop as Catra spoke her wish out loud.

“I want She-ra,” Catra said and Perfuma’s face grew tight and twitched as she started to force her smile. That was all Catra needed to prove that she had the right person. No one knew the movement of a town better than a holy person.

“If you say it out loud it wont come true,” Perfuma said, trying to sound light and playful but it came out like a strangled whisper.

“I’m not worried about that. I know I’m going to find her,” Catra said and Perfuma smiled tightly. The tension was building and thankfully Scorpia popped it with her desperate need to be friendly to everyone.

“Thank you for your hospitality Miss Perfuma. We should get out of your hair,” Scorpia said politely and Perfuma’s face changed as she turned her attention to Scorpia. Her smile was nothing but warmth once again.

“Please come again any time,” Perfuma said directly to Scorpia. When Scorpia turned away from Perfuma to leave the small church Catra gave Perfuma a fanged grin as she put her hat on and left through the open door.

#

Catra latched Duchess to the hitching post and approached the Greyskull homestead. She knew this was a stupid idea but after a week of waiting for Adora to find her Catra was losing her patience. She knew how to get Adora’s attention, if she wasn’t going to react to her little stunt at the church then she would up her efforts.

It was late at night and they already knew she was with the Horde. Which meant this would either get Adora’s attention or it would get the Rebellion on her tail. She could handle Adora, and if the Rebellion wanted a piece of her, she would do her job and bring them down for their trouble.

Catra knocked on the door and expected the redhead to answer. Her face morphed from confusion to a tight smile as she recognised Catra in the low light of the porch.

“Captain, we weren’t expecting you. What can we do for you?” The woman asked and Catra felt stupid. She was catapulted into her awkward teenage self in an instant. The thought of meeting Adam, and knowing who he was made nerves twist up her stomach. She felt like she was meeting someone important and she really was.

“Can I speak to Adam?” Catra asked, trying to give her a friendly smile but not sure how it turned out when the redhead looked even more uncomfortable.

“Whats this about?” the woman asked and Catra looked at her with serious eyes. She knew she should make up an excuse, more people didn’t need to know about her campaign to find Adora, but this woman may very well know her. Adora was always good at instilling loyalty in people, and the only way to navigate that stubborn emotion, was the truth.

“Adora,” Catra said and the woman’s jaw tightened and the wood of door in her hand creaked under the pressure of her grip. Her green eyes searched Catra’s but she didn’t seem satisfied when she stepped back from the door to allow her inside.

“Come in. I’ll get him,” She said and walked down the hall before she turned. “Boots off,” she said firmly. Catra removed her hat and closed the door behind her as she stepped inside the house. She nodded her understanding and took her boots off before she walked into the sitting room to wait.

Catra’s attention was immediately captured by the large painting on the wall over the fireplace. There were four people in the huge painting, a family portrait.

The first was a beautiful elegant woman with fiery red hair twisted up in a complex hairstyle. She wore a green dress and sat on the couch that still sat before the fireplace to this day. Over her right shoulder was a large man, tall with wide shoulders but a gentle face. Catra looked at his gentle eyes and her demure scowl with a strange sense of familiarity.

Sat on the regal woman's lap was two blonde twins, one wearing a pink frilly dress and the other wearing a small pantsuit. Neither looked happy, but it was clear the painter tried to improve on their expressions. Catra took her time looking at the face of their daughter, sitting with her hair cropped short and in a suit. Adora looked miserable in that outfit. Her eyes skimmed to their son, sitting in his frilly dress with long hair and mirroring his sisters expression.

Catra looked back at their parents, when she heard Adora’s stories of her family she always thought her parent would look evil. But they just looked like normal people, not evil, but clearly they didn’t understand their twins the way they should have.

Catra heard a throat clearing behind her and turned from the painting to look at Adam. Her ears flicked back at being so distracted that he could sneak up on her.

“Captain, what a surprise,” Adam said and bowed his head respectfully. Catra nodded silently back. She was annoyed but not at Adam, at herself. She felt stupid to want to gush about all the stories she had heard about him. All the tales Adora told her over the years late at night that made it feel like Adam was growing up beside them. Catra hated how happy it made her that Adora had met him again because she knew how important her twin was to her. She knew how much finding him would mean to the blonde and Catra wanted to rejoice in her victory and share in her excitement. But not yet.

This felt like meeting the family even though Adora and her weren’t anything to each other anymore. Adora was never going to bring her home because Adora didn’t care about her that way.

“I need to find your sister,” Catra said, skipping all the small talk to get to the crux of the issue.

“Why?” Adam asked, his tone was short and clipped. His jaw flexed just like Adora’s would when she was annoyed.

“Did she tell you about me?” Catra asked, unable to stop her curiosity as she looked at Adam closely. His cheeks tinged pink as he glanced away which was an interesting reaction to have. Adora must have told him something about them, or maybe what they did when they last met. Catra did bite the hell out of her neck.

“Nothing good I bet,” Catra said with a small smirk before she glanced back at the painting. She wondered if she would have anything nice to say about herself if she was in Adora’s shoes.

“No, she didn’t have a bad word to say about you,” Adam said gently and Catra’s eyes snapped back to him. He was watching her closely but his eyes were gentle and curious. Perhaps a family trait. Catra moved uncomfortably under that gaze before she sighed.

“That’s…surprising…” Catra said, looking away from him to glance around the room. She felt uncomfortable, but strangely the scent that filled the room still smelt of home.

“My sisters not a liar. But are you here to prove her wrong?” Adam asked, his voice hardening as Catra’s silence stretched on. Catra rolled her eyes at his question.

“No, I just…I need to talk to her, can you tell her when you see her?” Catra said as she tried to fight the blush that came to her face as Adam grinned. He looked delighted at her words and Catra was surprise to see how alike and yet different Adam and Adora’s smiles were.

“This isn’t about the Horde right? She’s safe if I tell her?” Adam asked, trying to wrestle his excited expression into something more serious.

“Yeah, shes safe with me,” Catra said and Adam beamed again. Catra knew her cheeks were red but she couldn’t stop even if she tried.

He had all right to be worried about his sister and maybe even himself. He had no idea that Catra would never hurt them. Not intentionally.

Catra wasn’t the Horde but she was a killer. People feared her for a reason and her reputation proceeded her everywhere she went. She should want blood, but Adora was always good at instilling loyalty, and regardless of their past, Adora would always have Catra’s loyalty. She wanted to see Adora and she felt closer to reaching her than she had in years. All she had to do was be patient.

#

When Adora and Catra moved into the adult barracks from the kids’ room at the age of eighteen. They were amazed at the level of privacy they suddenly had. The bunk beds were in bedded in the rock wall in a long narrow room with panels that slid across to block the beds from view. Catra and Adora hadn’t really considered what those panels were for until they had heard older recruits utilising the guise of privacy to get very friendly with each other.

Catra and Adora hadn’t really done much with the privacy beside have a few sleep overs to cuddle but they had been teased mercilessly when they both climbed out of Adora’s bunk in the morning. They had later found that it was easier to hide their sleep overs on the top bunk. Catra kept her privacy screen closed, so it was less obvious when the last panel was clicked shut.

Catra heard movement from below her bunk as Adora left hers. She grabbed a book to pretend she hadn’t been waiting for the blonde to come join her and flicked through the pages casually. Catra’s tail flicked gently as she heard the creak of Adora on the small ladder as she came into the bunk. Catra was wearing a singlet and a pair of panties so she was delighted when she heard Adora’s soft gasp as she clicked the privacy screen closed.

The space was barely big enough for one person but it made their sleepovers feel more intimate. Catra wasn’t very big to begin with, a lithe frame at only 5’2, but the same couldn’t be said for Adora. She was 6’2 and built of muscles so she didn’t fit in the upper bunk very well at all. The bedding moved as Adora moved up from the bottom of the bunk and one hand brushed over the backs of Catra’s thighs gently as she went. Catra shivered, her short fur fluffing up at the contact before Adora pressed a soft kiss to the back of Catra’s bare shoulder. Catra swivelled her ears back to hear the shaky breath Adora gave and it filled her with desire.

They hadn’t done anything more than kissing and cuddling, but Adora was slowly getting more bold the longer they could share a private space. Her hands wandering more under Catra’s gentle encouragement. Adora was nervous and Catra wasn’t trying to rush her, but if she ever touched Catra she knew she would probably pop immediately.

Catra finally stopped ignoring Adora and looked over her shoulder to see her big blue eyes peaking out as she pressed her lips to her skin. Adora’s hand was still cupping the swell of her backside and tantalising touch was doing far too much for her.

“If you keep that up, you’ll have to watch me rub one out before bed,” Catra purred and Adora hid her face against Catra’s back with a mix of embarrassment and desire. Catra couldn’t help but laugh at her embarrassment. Catra loved to tease her. “Relax dork,” Catra said and Adora had to move back to allow Catra to roll onto her back.

The movement brought Catra’s breasts into view and her nipples were visible through the thin fabric of her shirt. Adora looked at the stiff peaks for a moment, completely distracted before she looked up at Catra’s smirking face.

“What? I can look,” Adora defended and Catra’s smirk only grew, she told Adora she liked it when she looked so Adora was right.

“You can do more than that if you want to, handsome” Catra offered and Adora blushed before she let her eyes trail down Catra’s neck to her chest again. Catra’s tail was lashing quickly now with excitement as Adora looked at her. Catra moved subtlety, her chest straining slightly against her shirt.

Adora leaned on one elbow to free her hand. She ran it gently over Catra’s stomach, bunching up her singlet before she reached her ribs.

Catra watched the contact with half lidded eyes and Adora paused to look at Catra’s face.

“Can I?” Adora asked softly and Catra nodded her head quickly.

“Please,” Catra said softly and Adora smirked a little. Usually it wouldn’t be so easy to get a please out of the magicat, but she was feeling generous with the promise of being fondled.

Adora cupped her right breast gently and let her thumb run over the stiff peak she could feel through the soft fabric. Catra panted a soft sound as she wiggled impatiently. Adora was emboldened by the reaction and let that confidence guide her as she moved her fingers under the singlet and dragged it down enough to uncover one dark nipple. Adora was watching Catra’s face carefully, but she had to close her eyes and as her hands fisted into the sheets.

“Okay?” Adora asked softly and Catra nodded.

“Yes,” Catra breathed and Adora ran her tongue over her nipple. Catra groaned and arched her back at the sensation, her legs opening invitingly. Adora started to shift her hips uncomfortably against the bed as she tried to adjust herself without Catra noticing. Adora’s face was getting red as she got more excited and Catra peeked down at her.

“Sorry,” Adora said, pulling away and Catra let out the breath she was holding.

“You don’t have to be sorry, if you aren’t ready its okay,” Catra said and Adora frowned cutely.

“Are you ready?”

“I am, but I don’t want to do it if you aren’t comfortable,”

“Its not…” Adora started then sighed before she rested her cheek against Catra’s soft breast and looked up at her. Catra wrapped her arms around her, tight enough to comfort her but not holding her in place. “I’m not uncomfortable…” Adora said and Catra huffed.

“I can see the discomfort all over your face,” Catra said and Adora blushed.

“I know, but its not because of this, its…its because of me,” Adora said and Catra frowned.

“What do you mean ‘Dor?”

“Because I look different to you,”

“I know you do, and I like the way you look,” Catra said and Adora blushed but looked surprised.

“You know?” Adora asked,

“Yeah, we go swimming together all the time, haven’t you ever looked?” Catra teased and Adora got even redder.

“Of course I have, but you’re beautiful,”

“So are you!” Catra said firmly as she cupped her cheek. Adora leaned into the touch but didn’t seem like she believed Catra.

“I would like to show you how beautiful you are, if you’ll let me,” Catra whispered and Adora pushed herself up to follow Catra’s guiding to kiss her mouth.

They had kissed many times but this kissed filled Catra with desire like no other before. Adora laid herself comfortably between Catra’s legs as they deepened the kiss and Catra rolled her hips up against Adora firm body. She wanted so badly to express how she felt without the words that felt truly terrifying. She wanted to show Adora how much she loved her.

#

Catra awoke with fire in her veins and a sweat on her skin that did not match the cold night air of the desert. She needed to find Adora and despite her attempts, when they finally crossed paths, it happened accidentally.

Scorpia had been harping in Catra’s ear all night, getting her drinks in the Horde bar and trying to get Catra to talk about her feelings. Gross.

Catra wasn’t and finally lost her temper at the white haired ball of hugs. She didn’t want to talk about her feelings, she wanted to find She-ra. So, instead of going to bed like she told Scorpia, she saddled up Duchess and set out into the Crimson Planes as the sun set.

The desert could be a deathtrap at night when the temperatures dropped and the wind started to blow. Catra was heading North east towards where Sparkles farm should be situated. If Adora wasn’t going to come to her gentle message to Adam, then she was going to point a gun in the face of that sparkle princess and see who showed up to protect her.

It was a stupid idea and as the cold nipped at her ears she started to sober up to the reality of it all. Duchess was getting annoyed at walking into the night and Catra knew she had to stop to make camp. It was too far to return to Horde Town tonight and Duchess was going to start biting her if she didn’t stop soon.

Catra cast her eyes around in the blue glow of the moon and recognised the landscape around her reasonably quickly. She kicked Duchess forward and she huffed her displeasure but followed direction to a hideout Catra and Adora had shared in their youth. They had hideouts speckled around the crimson planes for when they were on a job or just looking for some time alone. They were little pockets of safety in an unsafe environment.

The hideout wasn’t much, just a small gorge that kept the wind away and the rain from falling on you. When they were teenagers, Catra and Adora had used it as a place to make-out because there was a rock that Catra could sit on that was the perfect height so that Adora didn’t have to bend down to her. Adora would run her hands up Catra’s waste as her tongue explored her mouth and Catra would moan under her touch.

Catra realised as she approached the hideout that a soft glow of light was coming from within. Catra paused, she was sure that someone else knew about this place. It wasn’t exactly well hidden and places like this were plenty on the planes, so maybe someone else started using it in her absence. It could be anyone, right? Catra moved Duchess closer and slid silently from her saddle. She pulled her along behind her until she could see into the enclosed space.

The first thing Catra saw was a white horse who lifted his head to look at Catra curiously but remained silent. Catra released Duchess’ reins and crept closer. The white stallion stuck out his nose to sniff at Catra as she crept past him into the firelight and finally spotted their owner.

She-ra. Well…Adora.

Just Adora.

Catra watched as Adora softly snored in her bed roll with one hand under the saddle she used as a pillow. Catra knew from past experience that hand was likely holding a knife. So, surprising the blonde wasn’t an option, which was a shame because it would be fun. Catra just didn’t want to end up in the dirt with a larger opponent, those were losing odds. Even if it was unlikely that Adora would actually harm her, but she didn’t know for sure.

The white horse sniffed at her shoulder and Catra ran a hand over his nose to calm him. He turned his investigations to Duchess who looked far less interested in him as she snorted her disapproval.

Catra turned her eyes back to Adora and noticed the soft frown on her forehead as she dreamed. Before Catra left she would have smoothed out Adora’s forehead with a firm finger and Adora would roll her eyes at her. Catra would hold her close to comfort her after a bad dream, but that was a long time ago.

Catra wanted Adora to tell her that none of what laid between them mattered, that the only thing that mattered was them. That ten years was nothing and being without her made her realise she loved Catra. She wanted her to chose Catra over everything and everyone, but she knew better than to expect that. Adora may have been fond of Catra, but Adora had a sense of duty to others that she would never break for someone like her. Catra didn’t mean enough to make that kind of commitment.

Younger, stupider Catra thought they were inevitable. She had poured herself into their friendship so that it could grow into something more. She always thought that after three years she would come back, and Adora would be so impressed with the woman she became that she would beg Catra to be hers.

It was a silly dream because she was just convenient to Adora. Catra was someone Adora could experiment with, someone she could feel comfortable and safe with while she learned the ropes. Then Adora let Catra go, without even a goodbye. Catra was angry, she was hurt and she wanted to burn the world to the ground because she hoped that maybe Adora felt the same way.

Catra’s eyes slid down to Adora’s mouth as heat pooled in her gut. She let her eyes roll down Adora’s neck to her collarbones and to the gap in her shirt. Adora looked different from the last time Catra had seen her.

Before Catra left, Adora like to wear men’s clothing while binding her chest to cover her curves trying to fit in the box the Horde made for her. Adora had a love-hate relationship with her femininity. She was a woman, but she wasn’t a princess, she was rough, strong and beautiful. Seeing Adora all dressed up had been one reason why Catra didn’t recognise her the first time. Adora in a dress was something Catra had never thought she would see.

Catra wondered how much she herself had changed in her time away. Catra was no longer that free spirited wild woman full of passion that Adora once knew. She was nothing like she used to be, nothing like the woman Adora cared for. She was a killer now, living in the shell of her former self. She wasn't someone anyone could love. Definitely not someone Adora could love. Adora was too good and too perfect to ever have room in her heart for someone like Catra.

Catra should keep loving her from afar, like she always had. It should be enough to know Adora was alive, it had to be enough. She had mourned Adora so strongly for so long that it felt surreal looking at her now. She was unbound and carefree, maybe a little tired, but it had been ten long years since she had seen her face and she looked just as beautiful as the day she left her.

Adora’s face matured, losing the soft shapes of her youth and instead cut a strong jaw and high cheekbones. Her hair was long and messy but clearly cared for since she left the Horde. Adora kept her hair short in the Horde to make their heists easier, but Adora dreamed of growing it longer back then. Adora appeared to feel comfortable enough in her skin to show more of her femininity so proudly and it looked good on her. Adora had been looking for her gender expression all her life but she seemed to have found where she stood now.

Catra’s eyes slid down Adora’s body, looking at the gap between the buttons of her shirt, admiring the unbound chest that nestled there. Adora had bound her chest when they were growing up claiming it made her a better rider, but Catra was sure she had been conflicted. Catra had very much enjoyed the newly available land that she had explored in their last encounter, however briefly.

Catra knew she should turn away, let the blonde sleep and try to forget about Adora’s skilled hands working her over easily even after all these years. She knew they had things to talk about and should talk about, but Catra was selfish. She took what she wanted with claws and teeth until there was nothing left to take. Hell bent on what she “deserved”.

Adora wasn't like that. She had missed her so much, and she just wanted to feel her again. Catra was never good at saying how she felt, but she could show Adora and hope she knew how to read those feelings on her skin.

Catra knew what she wanted, and she just needed a plan to wake Adora without getting a knife at her neck. Adora was laying on her back with her head propped up on her saddle and her bedroll open in cold night air. Adora was always warm in the night and Catra remembered the feeling of that comforting warmth at her back.

She didn't want to startle Adora awake because Catra knew Adora's strength even when she was half the size she is now and did not want to end up in the dirt. Catra decided to act on the side of caution and walked around the blonde, avoiding the firelight and anything that could cause noise to check what her hidden hand was holding.

There was a knife there, but to Catra’s surprise Adora was holding a piece of paper in her grip instead. Catra reached for the paper to try to take it from her fingers but even in her sleep Adora’s fingers tightened to hold onto the parchment. Catra made a face but decided to leave it. She grabbed the knife and moved it out of reach, putting it with Adora’s pack instead so she couldn’t stab her when she surprised her.

Catra moved back to Adora’s side, her eyebrows were crinkled again and this time Catra didn’t stop herself from reaching out and smoothing out her brow. Adora started to rouse from the soft touch and her eyelashes flutter blearily before they opened with a soft groan. Adora’s blue eyes widened at Catra as she realised what she was seeing.

“Hey dummy,” Catra whispered, a little too breathless and Adora pushed herself up on her bedroll to wrapped her arms around Catra in a crushing hug. Catra squeaked as she was pulled into Adora’s lap but tried to return the embrace with the same level of enthusiasm. Her purr kicked up immediately as she tried to hold back from nuzzling into Adora’s strong arms.

Catra missed her so much.

“Is this a dream?” Adora asked into her hair. Catra laughed as she ran her hands through Adora’s long golden locks and Adora pulled back to look at her.

“Do you want it to be?” Catra asked to gauge Adora’s feelings. Catra had hoped for a kiss to reunite them, but maybe Adora was seeing someone. Would they have to navigate being just friends along with being on opposite sides?

“No, I’ve dreamt about you for far too long,” Adora said, her eyes soft and her arms tightening momentarily to squeeze Catra closer. Catra’s tail flicked with interest and Adora’s eyes tracked the movement. “Stars, I’ve missed you,” Adora said looking at Catra with such fondness that she trilled with panic. She couldn’t do talking.

“I’m mad at you,” Catra growled and Adora tipped her head like a confused puppy as she blinked at her.

“Mad at me?” Adora repeated, Catra could see her wracking her brain for why Catra could be mad at her but Catra wasn’t going to talk.

“Shut up” Catra growled and finally kissed Adora. Adora was surprised but only for a moment before she returned the kiss. Adora’s kiss hadn’t changed, it was all fire and passion and it filled Catra with heat as it burnt her from the inside out. Adora didn’t waste time as her hands ran up Catra’s thighs to grip her hips and pull her closer.

Adora mumbled against Catra’s lips, but clearly whatever she wanted to say wasn’t more important that keeping their mouths together. Catra buried her hands in Adora’s hair and they finally pulled apart to catch their breath.

“S-shouldn’t we…you know…talk first…” Adora stumbled thorough the sentence as Catra moved to her neck to suck a hicky into her skin. Catra was being rough, rougher than she ever was with Adora, but she was hurt and she needed to feel close to her even if she was angry. Catra pushed all her weight onto Adora to force her back into her bedroll and Adora huffed at her. Catra realised all too quickly that if Adora’s mouth wasn’t occupied that she was going to keep talking.

“Are you trying to tussle?” Adora asked playfully as she gripped Catra’s thighs like she was going to flip them. Catra growled, real anger coming into the sound. Adora had always been a pretty hard top, she liked to give and please her partners but Catra wasn't going to let her. She was angry, hurt and so, so horny that Adora came back from the dead looking like that. Catra wanted and needed to be in control for once and she was going to have it her way.

“Stop talking,” Catra hissed and kissed Adora again. Adora returned the kiss with the same intensity, without the roughness but Catra needed the roughness. She was terrified of letting Adora touch her like she was soft in case she broke into pieces and she wasn’t sure she could stick herself back together without her.

“Wait, are you actually mad at me?” Adora asked, clearly still confused.

Catra grabbed her hair and used it to pull her head back and show her neck. Catra bit her like she did the first night, biting the same spot at the bottom of her neck by her shoulder. It soothed her to see the indentations there and Adora moaned loudly as she rocked her hips up. Catra’s fur stood on end as Adora rubbed against her through all their layers. It felt so good, so familiar and so desperately needed.

“Is this because of the letters?” Adora tried, not listening to instructions and Catra growled.

“We are not talking,” Catra said and Adora rolled her eyes.

“So… you’re here for me to fuck the anger out of you?” Adora asked with a little smirk and Catra glared.

“No, I’m going to fuck you and you are going to let me,” Catra said and Adora’s hands flexed on her thighs. She considered Catra’s offer for a moment as a light colour came to her cheeks.

“What if I want to talk?” Adora asked curiously and Catra growled as she gripped the collar of Adora’s shirt.

“Then you aren’t going to get your…” Catra stopped and her ears flicking back. In her haste to get what she wanted she had rushed ahead. Adora had always had a changing opinion of her body and sexual expression. Catra always asked Adora what she wanted her genitals to be called before they started. Adora had been experimenting with different names when they last did this and Catra needed to know before she called it anything. Adora raised an eyebrow at her abrupt stop. “What do you call it now?” Catra asked in a small voice. Catra could be rough with Adora, she was a big girl and she could handle it, but she wasn’t going to hurt her image of herself by being an ass hole.

Adora’s face split into a wide grin. “You’re so cute,”

“I am not!” Catra huffed but felt her cheeks colour in her embarrassment.

“I just call it what it is now,” Adora said, shrugging one shoulder nonchalantly.

“A penis?” Catra asked carefully.

“Or dick, cock, you know, the usual,” Adora shrugged again like it was no big deal even if her younger self would have lost her mind at this revelation.

“That’s new,” Catra said and Adora grinned as she relaxed onto her bedroll.

“Are we talking now?” Adora asked, her smile was playful but her eyes were unsure and a little guarded.

“No,” Catra said petulantly but still waited for Adora to reply anyway.

“Calling it something else started to feel like I was denying part of myself. I know it doesn’t fit with the body I want, but its part of me and its here to stay. So I decided to love all of me, and it helped a lot with how I see myself. I feel like I can just…be now.” Adora explained with a little frown like she wasn’t sure how Catra would take it.

Catra’s eyes were wide, she already loved Adora’s body just the way it was, but it was so fucking hot that she loved it now too. This what Catra wanted for Adora, to be comfortable in her own skin and not be afraid to take up space and it made her so proud.

Catra laid herself on top of Adora so their faces were close together and Adora gave Catra her full attention.

“Then you aren’t going to get your d-dick inside me,” Catra purred out, stumbling only slightly on the word. Adora groaned softly. She moved her hands up to grip Catra’s hips as she rubbed up against her. Catra gasped softly at the stimulation, already aching for her.

“Can we talk after?” Adora asked gently with a pleading expression. Catra had no intention of talking but Adora’s big eyes were hard to deny.

“Maybe,” Catra said and kissed Adora firmly. Adora seemed to be content with that answer and kissed her back.

Catra bit Adora's lower lip and felt her big callous hands grip her ass firmly. Catra half expected a slap to her backside for the attack but Adora just groaned and pushed harder into their kiss.

They separated and Catra started to undo the last of Adora's shirt buttons, she needed to see her bare. She needed to lay a claim to Adora's pale skin so that one last time everyone would know who she belongs to. Catra was convinced that they could never do this again. Catra could get it out of her system and then leave Adora to live her life without her. Adora would be happier that way.

"Catra…" Adora sighed, her voice husky and breathy and Catra glared at her as she pulled her shirt open to see her bra.

"No," Catra said firmly and Adora looked a little bratty for just a moment before she buried her hand in Catra's hair and pulled her into another kiss. The kiss was all teeth and tongue and desperation. It felt like longing and pining and missing a limb but it never felt like enough. Catra was burning and she needed more. She needed to be consumed so that maybe Adora would finally understand.

Catra grabbed Adora's tits and felt the blonde moan against her mouth. Catra couldn't be sure after so many years but Adora's chest felt fuller and it felt so good to be holding her and knowing it was her.

Stars, I missed you, dummy.

Adora wasn’t rushing to get her bare like Catra was. Adora was taking her time, enjoying the familiarity of the kiss and waiting for Catra to expel the negative energy she was dealing with. The worst part was it worked. Catra settled against Adora’s chest, kissing her slow and deep as Adora ran her hands down her back to the top of her tail. Catra was so distracted by the gentle stroking that she didn’t notice that she had matched Adora’s speed until Adora scratched the base of her tail and she pushed up against the touch as she gasped against her mouth.

Adora pulled back to watch her expression and Catra closed her eyes to ignore the smirk on the blondes dumb face.

“I know you want to be in control, but you can still do that while I touch you,” Adora offered running her nose along Catra’s jaw before kissing the base of her ear. Catra’s claws came out at the act, pricking the skin of Adora’s chest. Adora gasped at the pain but didn’t try to stop her as she pulled back to look at her face.

“No,” Catra said, opening her eyes as her cheeks turned red “I want to touch you,” Catra said quietly and Adora smiled like she wanted to call her cute again. Catra gripped her tit a little firmer as her claws pricked her skin and Adora seemed to rethink her words. Instead she groaned softly.

“You can touch me, but I want to touch you too,” Adora agreed breathlessly and Catra smirked.

“Fine, but you first,” Catra said, determined to touch Adora the way she had been thinking about since she had realised she was alive. Her anger was ebbing in the presence of Adora’s soothing scent and the blondes surprisingly relaxed demeanour. Catra wanted to be angry, but the relief was quelling the fire in the blood and replacing it with a completely different type of burning. Catra could have this, for one night, she could be selfish and have Adora just how she wanted her.

Catra wanted to strip Adora bare and kiss every inch of her body, but they weren’t in a warm bed with locked doors. They were in the middle of the Crimson desert, famous for being rough and dangerous. Catra wanted to see all of Adora, but in reality it wasn’t an option.

In the past they never really undressed, rushing to get to the main event as quickly and quietly as they could before they could be seen. In the past Adora would bend her over to get a satisfying angle for them both, but that was not an option. Catra was not willing to hand herself over to anyone like that anymore, even Adora, not yet at least.

Adora was watching Catra quietly as she lost herself deep in thought. Catra’s eyes snapped back to Adora’s face and she offered a small smile.

“Hey,” Adora said and Catra refocused on the task at hand before she leaned down to kiss her again. Adora accepted the affection and the kiss got more heated as Catra licked into Adora’s mouth. Adora’s hands wandered as the kiss continued and her thumb gently flicked over her nipple, causing Catra to moan.

Catra was considering just using her mouth on Adora when she heard the shuffling of the horses outside the nook they were hidden in. Catra’s ears perked up and she looked out into the firelight. Catra alerting Adora to the possibility of danger.

After a few seconds Catra confirmed that they weren’t getting attacked she decided how to proceed. She grabbed Adora’s discarded blanket to hide them from view and laid it over herself before she wasted no time getting friendly with Adora’s uncovered chest. Catra might have wanted to see Adora bare, but she was also possessive of Adora’s nudity. She wanted it all for herself.

Catra pulled Adora’s bra down and took her perky nipple into her mouth without delay. Adora groaned and rubbed up against Catra, gripping her hips to keep her in place and they both gasped.

“Cat, not to rush you, but at this rate you’re going to make me cum in my jeans,” Adora said. Catra looked up at her as she bit her nipple. Adora was already flushed and her eyes were unfocused and dark with desire. Catra rubbed against her and Adora gasped as her hands held Catra still in a desperate attempt to not loose control.

“Someones pent up,” Catra teased, her hands running down Adora’s flexing abs to her belt buckle and started undoing her pants.

“Yeah, well…its been a while…” Adora muttered like she hoped Catra wouldn’t hear her, but Catra’s ears perked to listen to her admission. Catra licked her lips as she got Adora’s pants open and the scent of her desire was intoxicating.

“Lets fix that,” Catra said and pushed herself up onto her knees to remove her own pants. Adora helped her as Catra stood to get her pants completely out of the way. Adora pushed her own pants down with too much enthusiasm so that Catra could retake her seat. Adora put the blanket securely around her and Catra rubbed her wet folds against Adora’s throbbing excitement. Adora gasped and grabbed Catra’s waist again but she wasn’t trying to stop her, instead encouraging her to roll her hips to pleasure herself against her.

Catra tilted her head back as she lost herself to the rhythm of their hips rocking together. As Catra rubbed along Adora, the head of Adora’s cock flicked her clit deliciously. She wanted to tease Adora more, maybe get off like this, but she didn’t want to wait anymore.

Catra pushed herself up on her knees and gripped Adora’s excitement to line it up with her entrance when Adora broke from her daze.

“Wait… I don’t have protection,” Adora panted, she already looked wrecked and Catra smirked with satisfaction.

“Do you have something I should know about?” Catra asked and Adora shook her head.

“No…” Adora confirmed and Catra raised an eyebrow, unsure what the issue was.

“Well I’m clean, so…” Catra said, moving her hips to push the head against her firmly. Adora gripped her hips to stop her.

“What if I get you pregnant?” Adora asked, her brow pinched in concern and Catra laughed at the absurd suggestion. Adora and Catra had sex for almost two years without protection. If Adora didn’t get her pregnant then, she wasn’t going to do it now.

“We never used it before and you didn’t,” Catra reminded her and Adora flushed a little before she bit her lip. She seemed torn between wanting Catra to continue and wanting to be careful. It was a very Adora problem to have.

“I guess you’re right,” Adora agreed, her hands pulling Catra just slightly until her head was buried in her and Catra gasps softly.

“Of course I’m right,” Catra said and pushed against Adora’s hold. Adora didn’t resist, her length disappearing inside Catra. Catra hadn’t been with another woman who had anatomy quite like Adora, so she didn’t know if she was big or not. But when she was inside Catra, she needed a moment to adjust to the feeling. Catra felt full and satisfied. She wanted to rock immediately but she leaned down to kiss Adora again before she started her movements.

Adora’s hands were firm on Catra’s hips as she helped to bring their hips together in a dance of ecstasy. Catra was using Adora’s mouth to muffle her own moans of pleasure and Adora’s hand in her hair kept her close.

All thoughts left Catra’s mind as their bodies moved as one. The last ten years didn’t exist anymore and they weren’t on different sides. They were just two people stumbling their way through feelings that no one ever told them how to feel.

Catra moaned against Adora’s lips as her body started to shake and she thrust harder against Adora. The drag of of clit against Adora’s body was sparking lights behind her eyes and she lost herself to the desire. Adora palmed Catra’s chest and the brush her nipple against her rough hands was sweet torture.

Catra felt herself tighten around Adora and Adora’s thrusts got wilder in response. Catra tried to hold back her scream as her body trembled with pleasure. Adora kept moving and Catra let Adora do all the work, letting her draw out Catra’s pleasure until she was joining her in release. There was something so hot about the way Adora’s body pulsed and the feeling of her spilling brought Catra to new heights.

Catra bit Adora’s lip, her desire to claim her was strong but she refused to move away from her mouth to achieve that goal. Adora groaned and thrust a few more times until her released was sated and she laid back to catch her breath.

Catra could barely hold herself up and instead flopped against Adora’s chest, nuzzling into her breasts and marking them as hers. Catra felt a purr rumble to life as the hormones filled her brain and relaxed her muscles. Catra was exhausted, but she should go…right?

Adora wrapped her arms around Catra and kissed her head. She enveloped them both in the blanket and they were safe to relax in the afterglow. Adora didn’t move at all as she relaxed into the gentle affection of Catra rubbing her face over her chest.

Adora’s hand stroked up and down Catra’s back, pushing her shirt out of the way easily to touch her skin. Catra could let Adora care for her in the aftermath of such an act, she could enjoy it until it was time to go. Catra pulled herself up slightly so she could reach the bite she left on Adora’s skin. Adora sighed contentedly as Catra licked at the wound to help it heal. Once she was done Catra closed her eyes and relaxed with a sigh, resting her body against Adora’s larger frame. Adora pressed another kiss to the top of her head.

Catra would get up in a minute, she just wanted to rest her eyes first.