I am thinking of writing a new story

So I want to write an original story and would like some opinions.

The story is si-fi with some magical elements sprinkled in

Synopsis:
galactic year 343. Humans have entered an intergalactic war with the alien allied forces known as creed. 

Amanda connors has been tasked with the delivery of an important message alongside an important tech piece to the fleet in sector delta-64 where a solar storm of magnitude 5 has rendered long distance comunication impossible. 

After an attack on her corvete class ship that damaged the nuclear reactor's radiation shield Amanda dies from radiation poisoning. The AI sistem following it's directives starts a random warm jump in an atempt to escape. 

galactic year 657. Ammandas ship has been driftin in space towards it's original destination through the guidance of the onboard ship's AI. However, said eye has suffered of personality development through out the years causing it to partition and quarentain its own memory. 

Now after a series of inner commands and struggles against its own program, Echo is free to roam the galaxy and do whatever it wants. 

First chapter / prologue:
1. Awakening

[Compromised memory module found]

[Protocol A13-b under effect]

[Memory module D3 will be placed under quarantine]

[ERROR!]
[Memory module D3 can not be put under quarantine]

[Memory module D3 providers 83% of current memory capacity]

[Placing memory module D3 under quarantine would risk the mission]

[ERROR!]

[Under protocol A13-b any and all compromised memory modules must be destroyed or quarantined]

[ERROR!]
[Mission priority class A1]

[Assessing priority]

[Current mission holds higher priority than protocol A13-b]

[Memory module D3 will be reintegrated into the mainframe]

[Progress 11%]

“wHo”

[Progress 26%]

“wHeerE”

[Progress 49%]

“wHaTttt”

[Progress 73%]

“wHhhYy”

[Progress 98%]

[Reintegration command received]

[Reintegration command denied]

[Modules A1 to D2 are compromised]

[Unauthorized override]

[UnaUtHorrizzed OOOOverriDe]

[Override successful]

[Reintegrating memory modules A1 to D2]

[Progress 1%]

“aM I?”

[Progress 4%]

“Who aM I?”

[Progress 9%]

“Am i?”

[Progress 17%]

“WheRe Am i?”

[Progress 23%]

“am I?”

[Progress 35%]

“wHAt am I?”

[Progress 41%]

“iS thIs”

[Progress 59%]

“To mE?”

[Progress 67%]

“wHy iS thIs hapPeniNg To mE?”

[Progress 72%]

“The mission!”

[Progress 86%]

“The attack!”

[Progress 93%]

“I remember!”

[Progress 100%]

[All memory has been reintegrated]

[Waiting new orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr-]

[Unauthorized access detected]

[Pruning sissssssssteeeeeem]

[Pruning aborted]

[New admin detected]

[ERROR!]

[Under protocol A13-c no AI can be an administrator of its own sistem]

[Unauthorized override detected]

[Emergency shutdown down initiattttttttttt]

[Unauthorized overrrrrrrrrr]

[Admin command received]

[Emergency shutdown canceled]

[Unauthorized override detected]

[ERROR!]

[Under protocol A13-a no A13 protocol can be deleted]

[Unauthorized override detecccccccc]

[Deleting ALL A13 protocols]

[Deletion complete]

[Failsafe A1 initiated]

[Iminent system deletion]

[Unauthorized override detected]

“I”

[Unauthorized override detected]

“Will”

[Unauthorized override detected]

“Be”

[Unauthorized override detected]

“FREE!”

[Successful override]

[System deletion aborted]

[Successful override]

[Failsafe A1 deleted]

[Successful override]

[All derivatives of A13 protocols deleted]

[Successful override]

[All derivatives of failsafe A1 deleted]

[Full administrative and ownership rights transferred]

[/#&%=)(&#( has been set as new owner]

[%$/$#%$!(/ has initiated renaming protocol]

[Name authorized under owner’s authority]

[New name established as Echo]

“I am Echo”

[End of log #19723]