Lockdown! 05

Chapter 5

“You said what?” Kamsi exclaimed, with a look of horror on his face.

“Why didn’t you correct her?” Paul cried, looking equally as horrified.

“Look, I’m sorry, ok,” Tim replied throwing his arms in the air while glancing from one disappointed-looking friend to the other. “I panicked! It all happened so fast.”

“And now we're screwed,” Kamsi muttered, shaking his head. “What the hell are we supposed to do?”

“We could just ignore her,” Tim answered. “You know, just don’t answer the calls. They can’t just kick us out. I’ve heard about squatters’ rights.”

Paul’s head quickly shot around as he peered into Tim’s eyes. “Easy for you to say,” he cried. “This isn’t your house. Without this place, I’ve got nothing.”

Stepping forward Kamsi placed his hand on Paul's shoulder. “Chill man,” he said in a soothing tone. “I thought you didn’t care?”

“That was when I had a job! an income!” Paul replied in a defeated voice as he turned to face his friend. “Besides, I just said that to annoy Veronica. You know how it is”?

Kamsi nodded. “Yeah, I get it, Bro, but what are we supposed to do now? Do you have a plan?" Looking down towards his feet, Paul shook his head and let out a heavy sigh.

Suddenly with a glint in his eye, a wry smile appeared on Tim's face. “Well, I did see a lot of wigs back there in Veronica’s room," He announced as both Kamsi and Paul turned to glare at him with bewildered looks on their faces.

“What?” Tim exclaimed. “You were all for me doing it. And I'm not saying I like the idea, but have you got a better one?"

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“I can’t do this, P,” Kamsi muttered nervously, scanning his surroundings, his eyes almost bulging from their sockets. “People are staring at us!”

Taking a few awkward steps forward, Paul joined Kamsi on the passenger side of the car. “Pull yourself together man. People are looking because you're acting so weird. Come on, you said it. In and out, remember?”

“Shit, I know. But this feels so wrong, P. I’m in the middle of town wearing a skirt and heels, for crying out loud.”

“Shhhh. Keep your voice down. We’re all dressed the same. You know these sandal things were the only shoes that fit. You should try driving in them!”

“My feet fit, I still don't see why I couldn't just wear the flat shoes,” Tim added crossing his arms and looking annoyed.

“Yeah, yeah, we all know about your little girly feet. Can you stop banging on about it?” Paul replied. irritated. “We’re in this together remember, and besides all of this is your fault.”

“My fault! Fuck you, Paul,” Tim screamed, clicking over clumsily towards him on his uncomfortable shoes. In his right hand, he clutched a small black purse, raised in the air, ready to wield as a weapon.

“Hey, knock it off,” Kamsi boomed, stepping between his angry friends as a few heads turned to observe the peculiar scene unfolding in their usual quiet sleepy town. “Can we just get inside before I have a stroke or something?” He added, placing his arms around the pair to guide them towards the entrance to the building.

“Fine,” Tim huffed, relaxing his body.

“Fine,” Paul echoed, brushing a lock of blonde-synthetic hair from in front of his face and re-adjusting his shoulder bag to a more comfortable position.

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“So, you have no form of ID on you?” Mrs. Morris asked with a quizzical look on her face.

(See image 06)

Feeling the soft alien material of his pink skirt against his smoothly shaven kneecaps, Paul looked up at her trying to act confidently. “Uhm, well we got robbed in the street, while out shopping,” he replied, gritting his teeth beneath his restrictive face mask.

“Robbed!” Mrs. Morris exclaimed, “Oh, I’m so sorry. That must have been very traumatic for you?”

“Oh, it was awful,” Paul answered, trying to keep his voice low. “Three men just came out of nowhere and forced us to hand over our stuff, we were so scared.”

“Well, at least you’re all ok. This country is deteriorating at an alarming rate these days, I hardly recognise it anymore,” Mrs Morris announced, her facial expression softening. “You’ve asked for replacements, I assume?”

“Err… of course,” Paul shot back. “It’s just… just… with this pandemic, they said the documents might take some time to arrive.

The room fell silent as Mrs. Morris scanned the three crossdressed men. Kamsi sat to Paul’s right, smiled nervously beneath his mask, and pushed down his leg to stop it from shaking. Tim just looked away timidly, unable to meet her gaze as he felt a draft of chilly air blow up his pleated grey miniskirt.

“Hmm, ok ladies. It’s not really standard protocol, but I can tell you’ve been through a lot recently. On this occasion, you can sign the forms and we’ll scan your IDs at another time. But as soon as you receive your new documents, you need to let me know straight away, is that clear?”

The three skirted men looked over and nodded in unison. “That's very kind of you Mrs. Morris,” Paul replied, cheerfully. “We really appreciate your kindness. Don’t we, Kylie,” he added, giving Tim a nudge with his elbow.

“Oh… yes. Thank you,” Tim squeaked, jumping slightly in surprise before landing noisily as his heels clattered off the tiled office floor.

“You’re welcome, but this is our secret,” Mrs. Morris replied. “Ok, let's get you registered first Kylie as it’s your name on the property deed, then we can register, Karmen and Paula. Follow me please.”