The cold war 09

Fully concentrated on the position in which he placed each foot, in his tall wedge pumps, Ben slowly stomped into the kitchen, where Irina sat alongside her mother Elena, chatting, and drinking their morning coffee.

“Come on, Ben, how many times do I have to tell you”, Irina announced from the kitchen table, “you need to keep your head up when you walk, you look really awkward looking down at your feet”.

Ben stopped in the centre of the room, feeling the tightness in his calf muscles and the strange angle his feet were forced into, “I’m trying, ok”, he replied in an annoyed tone, “all this is kind of new to me, you know”?

“Wow, someone’s in a bitchy mood today”, Irina replied shaking her head, “there's nothing wrong with a woman with a bit of attitude, but try to tone it down a bit when you're talking to me and Mamulya, ok”?

Elena, who up until now, had just sat there looking him up and down, placed down her coffee cup and looked up into his eyes, “turn”, she commanded twisting her finger in front of her.

After a moment of looking at her and realising she was serious, Ben shook his head a little before slowly spinning around on the spot feeling ridiculous.

“This is acceptable”, Elena announced nodding, “but, remember, Bun, today you are girl, reputation of business, very important, this no joke, understand”?

Ben nodded, “Yes, Elena, I understand, I’ll try to blend in, believe me, the last thing I want is any more embarrassment”.

“Good”, Elena replied, “now, come, sit, you want coffee”?

“Yes, thank you”, Ben answered, before making his way over to the kitchen table where he carefully removed his little purse, placing it on the chair next to him before plomping himself down on the chair in a less than elegant manner.

“Oh, no, that won’t do”, Irina announced, “take a look at your legs, how many women do you see sat like that”?

Ben looked down and knew she was right, “his legs were apart like he used to sit when wearing pants, but the worst part was his short skirt had ridden up almost to his waist allowing anyone looking on a clear sight of his silky underwear beneath his sheer pantyhose. Embarrassed, he quickly grabbed the side of his skirt, and in one swift movement stood up and pulled it back into position.

“Like this”, Irina said, standing up and showing him how she did it, smoothing out her skirt behind her backside with her hands before slowly placing herself on the chair with her back held straight, she then crossed her legs at mid-thigh all the while keeping eye contact with him, “now, you try”, she announced.

Feeling a little emasculated but having experienced much worse over the last few days, Ben did his best to imitate what Irina had just shown him.

“Again”, she commanded as he crossed his legs, “but this time don’t look down, keep your eyes on me”.

After another three attempts, Irina finally seemed satisfied, “much better”, she said pouring him a coffee from the filtered pot in the centre of the table, “do that every time you sit from now on, skirt or no skirt”.

Ben sighed and shook his head giving Irina a frustrated look.

“Hey, you were the one who said living like me would be easy, Benny boy”, Irina said passing him his coffee, “no one is forcing you to do this”.

“It is easy”, Ben announced to the surprise of Irina and Elena who glared at him, “I mean, if I was a girl that is”, Ben quickly added.

“Oh really, please explain”, Irina said crossing her arms, “how is this easier for a girl”.

“Well… all we’ve done the last few days is shopping and beauty treatments, if I was a girl and found it as easy as you to walk all day on heels and I could use my hands as well as you with these long nails, life would be pretty sweet”.

“Ha”, Irina exclaimed as her mother looked on stunned, “do you really think I don’t feel pain in my feet after walking around in heels all day? or find long nails frustrating? Surely, you can't be that naive, Benny? Do you not realise how unfair it is for a woman to have to dress and behave in a certain way just to be afforded the same opportunities as the men of this world? And why? Because we weren't born with a piece of meat hanging between their legs"?

Elena nodded her head, “You have lot to learn, Bunny”, Elena announced from across the table, “business world is man’s world,  a woman need to act certain way to succeed”.

Irina suddenly broke out laughing breaking the tension in the room, “what”? Elena said turning to her daughter”, what is so funny”?

“Mamulya, say Benny again”, Irina said struggling to get the words out whilst laughing.

“Bunny”, Elena repeated as Irina laughed even louder, “why is this funny”?

Irina tried to calm herself down a little, wiping away a tear from the corner of her eye, “remember earlier, you asked me what we were going to call, Ben, while in the office? Well, I think you just came up with the perfect name for our new office girl.  What do you think, Bunny”? Irina said looking across the table at Ben, bursting out in laughter once more, "I think it suits you".

(See image 5.2)