The role of a lifetime 06

“Jim, I’m back, can you give me a hand”? Victoria called out, returning from the supermarket.

There was no reply.

She placed the grocery bags on the floor and walked into the living room to Jim, sat on the sofa just staring into space, “Jim, I need help putting the groceries away, did you not hear me call, you”?

“Uh what”, Jim muttered looking up confused.

Seeing that he was clearly distressed about something, Victoria walked over and sat next to him, “are you ok”? she asked her feminized boyfriend.

“Yeah, just thinking about something”, Jim replied.

“About last night”? Victoria asked.

Jim, sighed, “yeah, I just can’t stop thinking about how different Britt was”.

“Yeah, I was surprised too, he always claimed he was the worlds best actor, but I didn’t expect him to be so natural”, Victoria replied.

“It's not just that, he looked so different, like he had done something to his face”, Jim announced shaking his head.

“I didn’t know if I was going to tell you this but when I was talking to Natalia last night, she couldn’t help but boast about how serious Britt was taking this challenge, she told me about how Britt visited a clinic last week and had some fillers in his cheeks and forehead, she even said he was going back this week for another appointment”.

“What”? Jim exclaimed loudly, “no fucking way as if he would take things that far”.

“He wants to win, Jim, and it seems he’s willing to get an edge wherever he can”, Victoria stated.

“What! And you think I don’t? Fuck, Vic, look at me, I’m dressed up like a fruitcake and I’ve been starving myself all week, hell, I’ve lost almost 15 pounds in a week, that can’t be healthy”, Jim said angrily, looking down at his smooth ever-thinning legs emerging from a little pleated miniskirt”.

“That’s your problem Jim, you are still thinking like a man”, Victoria shot back, “that’s why you’re so uncomfortable wearing those clothes”.

“I am a man”, Jim shouted, “and how am I ever supposed to feel comfortable in these stupid embarrassing clothes”.

“Embarrassing, what's so stupid and embarrassing about them? I wear clothes like that all the time, they're just clothes Jim”, Victoria replied angrily.

“Yeah, women’s clothes, you know for women”, Jim replied sarcastically.

Victoria leaned forward and smacked him hard across the back of the head, “stop your fucking moaning”, she screamed, “you were the one who had to comment about how easy acting was, and you were the one who said you would be a better looking woman, and no one forced you to sign away our fucking life, you need to snap out of this now and focus on what needs to be done, do you understand me, Jem”.

Jim was shocked by the outburst, “but you saw him, Vic, how can I compete with that”? he replied rubbing the back of his head.

“He’s acting Jim, and he’s getting into character, you need to do the same”, Victoria replied calming down a little.

“What, you mean like get fucking injections in my face”? Jim shot back.

“Maybe, Natalia did give me a business card for the clinic, but first you just need to start thinking of yourself as a woman, you need to start to feeling more comfortable in your own skin”.

Jim nodded slowly, taking in her words, “but I can’t do what he did, Vic, aren’t those Botox injections like permanent”?

“No, they only last a few months, but forget about the injections, you need to start fighting back, Jim, or you’re going to ruin our future and do you really want to see the smug look on that gits face when he wins and takes our money from the business you pretty much singlehandedly built”.

“No, of course not”, Jim announced loudly, “I can’t lose, not now after all I’ve gone through, I’m sorry Vic, I’ve fucked everything up big time, but I’m going to fix this, I promise, I’ll do whatever it takes to make things right”.

“Now there’s the Jim I know, you keep that fighting spirit, and next time you have any doubts, just imagine Britt’s smug face laughing at you as he humiliates you and takes all our hard-earned money”, Victoria said forcefully, “now go and put the shopping away then get back to practising that piano”.

Two days later, sat in the living room, looking through his phone, Jim suddenly cried out, “that fucking arsehole”.

Victoria, who was sat next to him, watching television jumped at the sudden outburst, “what the hell, Jim? You nearly frightened me half to death”.

“It’s Britt, he’s copied us, he's started his own Instagram page, he just sent me a friend request”, Jim stated angrily.

“Well, what did you expect, he’s trying to make it look like he actually exists, just like you”, Victoria replied rolling her eyes.

“Well. I…I…”, Jim paused midsentence as he opened up the latest image on the profile of Brittney Anne St. Clare, “oh my god, look at him? Look at what he did?”, Jim shrieked, passing Victoria his phone”.

Victoria looked down at the screen and gasped, “wow, I guess he did go back for that second appointment”, she announced looking down in awe at Britt’s smooth taught skin and pouty lips, casually walking down the street in purple tweed skirt suit and sky high mary jane platform pumps.

(See image 6.1)

“I don’t get it, Vic, how is he willing to go so far”? Jim answered, clearly shocked by what he had just seen.

“He’s living and breathing the role, Jim, remember him talking about McConaughey losing 50 pounds for his part in Dallas buyer club, think about it, if someone told you a young beautiful actress had gotten a few fillers, would that surprise you”?

“No, but he’s not an actress, he’s Britt”, Jim replied, scratching his head.

“Not right now, he’s not, he’s Brittney St’ Clare, model, and actress, it says right here on his profile”, Victoria answered scrolling through some of his other uploads.

Jim, sat quietly for a moment thinking as the image of Britt’s face standing over him laughing and Victoria packing up her things and walking out on him dominated his thoughts, “you said, those fillers, only lasted a few months right”? Jim asked sheepishly, turning to Victoria.

Victoria looked up with a shocked expression before quickly regaining her composure, “yeah, it gets absorbed into the skin after a while then you need to go back for more, why do you ask”?

“Well... I was thinking... perhaps I could give it a go, you know, just to show him how serious I am, do you still have that business card”? Jim replied not completely convinced he was doing the right thing.

Victoria smiled before leaning over and hugging him, “thank you, Jim, I know you said the other day, you’d do whatever it takes, but to be honest, I doubted you, I’m sorry for not believing in you, I’ll give them a ring first thing in the morning. Man, I can’t wait to see the look on Natalia’s face when she hears about this”.

Saturday evening, with the centre of the city bustling with people out for a good time, Jim and Victoria strode confidently through the city streets as every man they passed, turned to give them a second look.

Trying to stay in character Jim, held his head high and tried to smile at anyone who looked his way as he tottered along, feeling the cool autumn air through the sheer black tights hugging his legs, the thick material of his fitted miniskirt tapping against his thighs.

As he walked along keeping pace with Victoria, hearing the now-familiar clicking sound as the six-inch blocky heels of his gold sparkly ankle boots collided violently with the pavement, he clutched on to his matching gold designer handbag, finding it hard to close his hand completely, thanks to his recently acquired acrylic nails that now extending well past the end of his fingertips.

His manicured ombre nails weren’t the only thing Jim was trying to adjust to that night. After a visit to a salon, where his hair just like his nails had been extended, now looking shiny and ultra-feminine bouncing around his head.

 It felt strange for Jim to be out without his wig as over the last few weeks, he had come to think of it his safety blanket, hiding his real identity and reminding him of who he was beneath all the feminine garments, but as he felt the chilly night air on his scalp, and felt the weight as his dark curls bounce around his neck, he knew the old Jim might not be around for a little while.

After arriving at their destination, where they were once again to meet Britt and Natalia for drinks, the two beauties deposited their coats in the cloakroom and descended a steep wooden staircase to the bar beneath. 

Concentrating where he placed his sparkly gold feet, and with his long nails wrapped around the bannister for support, Jim looked on mesmerized as the image of a stranger, in the mirror at the bottom of the staircase, grew larger with every loud step of his painfully tall boots.

Reaching the bottom, he stopped for a moment, transfixed on the image in the mirror in front of him, still finding it difficult to accept the femme fatal staring back at him through her dark overly made-up eyes, framed by thick fluttery fake lashes was actually him. But that night, his thick fake lashes weren’t the thing that shocked him the most, that honour went to his Botox enhanced face, still slightly numb from his visit to the clinic the previous day.

If someone had told him before his visit that it was possible to transform someone’s appearance so drastically in just an hour, he wouldn’t have believed them, but the proof was staring him square in the face, his smooth, rounded out face, that made him look years younger than he was,

“Come on, Jem, you look stunning, girl, stop pouting at yourself and let’s get inside”, Victoria stated impatiently from behind.

Jim shook his head at the mention of his lips, puffy and swollen, like two inflatable inner tubes slathered in pink lip-gloss and now resting naturally in a permanent pout. 

“It’s only temporary”, he thought to himself as he took a deep breath, fluffing up his hair before spinning on his tall heels and sashayed his way towards the entrance of Bar No.7.

(See image 6.2)