Three Square Meals Ch 96 - complete!
Added 2017-12-16 01:06:00 +0000 UTC*** EDITED - FINAL version - (21st Dec). ***
Hey everyone!
I've done a first editing pass of part 1 to pick up typos, but there's a few more substantial edits I'll make based on editor feedback. You can probably expect to see them tomorrow afternoon. The editors will be casting their skilled eyes over part 2 over the next few days, so hopefully I should have the fully-edited version for you by about Monday or Tuesday.
Anyway, here's chapter 96, I hope you enjoy it!
Tefler
Comments
Added to Timeline
Dark Storymaker
2017-12-28 21:20:07 +0000 UTCThe withdrawal is so real right now
Mark Hall
2017-12-23 05:17:03 +0000 UTCMerry Christmas tefler
Mark Hall
2017-12-23 05:16:37 +0000 UTC*off-key singing* Should Old Acquaintance be forgot... Crazy! Stop. Singing isn't going to make Tefler post the next chapter any faster. But-! But nothing. Go find something else to do, preferably something quiet that doesn't include pestering me.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-23 02:44:38 +0000 UTCUnfortunately I've been tied down with pre-Xmas stuff, so I'm not going to be able to get chapter 97 out by the 25th. I've written about 14k so far, so I'm still on track for getting it done before the end of the month. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-23 02:33:37 +0000 UTCYes, Tefler better tell us now if we should get our hopes up^^'
ChrisW
2017-12-22 14:55:11 +0000 UTCHow's it going with chapter 97, Tef? You going to make it in time for Santa's deliveries, or are we gonna be singing Auld Lang Syne when it comes out?
Jedi Khan
2017-12-22 08:13:18 +0000 UTCYeah, I've had that problem for the last 3 chapters i found if i use a different web browsers it will download just fine. Or use the pateron app but that work only sometimes for me
2017-12-22 02:37:07 +0000 UTCPatreon contributor and long time fan here: When I click download on the .docx file on my android and then open it, it tries to unpack it as a user-supplied dictionary. This works fine on my PC of course. Does anyone else have that problem? Since I'm on mobile most of the time I download on my PC, upload to google docs, and read the google doc on my android. I haven't seen that with any other download file.
Chef Marco
2017-12-22 00:33:19 +0000 UTCThey kidnapped a NEWSWOMAN? Now all the things they're gonna do to her to make her John's next broken little bird are gonna be on the Evening Edition. Bravo Admiralty, bravo. And I like how Tef is showing that the TFed ain't as weak as the Kintark think, specially with the new secret johnny-tech. WAR! Huuh! Good gawd, yall!
Youkai-sama
2017-12-22 00:30:10 +0000 UTCTefler, are you still shooting to have 97 out before Christmas day?
2017-12-21 23:49:38 +0000 UTCI'm sure I missed some other scenes
Forbsey
2017-12-21 11:41:42 +0000 UTCYou know I like to go back and reread the best scenes (for me) like when John gave the new tech to Charles, when Calara's mum found out who John is, Deveroux seeing Alyssa make armour and John lifting a fuel injection engine weighing tonnes. The entrance of John and the girls in the Terran/Kintark battle, Jade turning into a T-rex, John destroying the assassin base. You Tefler will go far as a writer. Just need more exposure (for your writing) to really get big.
Forbsey
2017-12-21 11:40:31 +0000 UTCI just posted the FINAL version. The tweaks I made today were just a couple of typos.
Tefler
2017-12-21 10:50:53 +0000 UTCSince this isn't a zip file then you have a couple of possibilities as to your problem. First try to right click the file in it's destination folder then select open with and select what ever word type program you use. If this doesn't solve it a recommend a system rebuild and better anti virus/malware software.
Cody Strong
2017-12-21 04:12:27 +0000 UTCI have a problem. Both my computer and phone download a .zip file. Why is this happening and how do I remedy it so that I can read the chapter?
Terra_Lupis
2017-12-21 03:45:39 +0000 UTCThe girls did a lot of other things while John was busy and I think most of us would assume that they took care of that as well. Something like that doesn't need to be specifically stated when we were already told it would happen.
Cody Strong
2017-12-21 02:16:01 +0000 UTCAlso, Tefler: You mentioned outfitting Luna, but there was no reference to that actually happening. Would it not be good for Luna to have her own portable laser cannon? You know, for 4th of July fireworks...lol
PLRus--Founding member of the TSM F5 club.
2017-12-20 20:51:55 +0000 UTCCall them B.O.D's Balls of Death. "Who let the BODS OUT! Boom! Boom! BOOM-BOOM!" LOL....sorry, had to.
PLRus--Founding member of the TSM F5 club.
2017-12-20 20:47:48 +0000 UTCThe Admiralty is making a tactical mistake: At the very least they should deploy lots of bombers and mine layers with interdiction modules around the gravity wells of the most likely attack routes. A softball sized ball of titanium would do a heck of a lot of damage to a cruiser which would then take out several other ships as it explodes into its own debris field. Put millions of those in clusters in front of the interdiction modules in a line that are in turn surrounded with clusters of mines at the point the fleet will come out of hyperwarp from the beacons and have scores of bombers there in range to loose everything they have...minimal crew. Then turn off the interdiction beacons at intervals when the first wave hits...so the rest of the fleet runs into the debris field at hyper-warp speeds. Also have cruisers tractor beam in asteroids into their projected paths for additional debris. With a little luck you could take out a third of their fleet before they reach the Core Worlds. As a seperate note: The Ashanath are already building asteroid based defensive systems. It was mentioned in the story when John was contacted about what to do with the marooned Drakkar (who were turned into marine contingents). And John's suggestion for more of a balance with both energy and projectile weapons was taken to heart as well. As for the saucer shape, turning them into spheres is the best and most efficient use of space. It gives better coverage angles for the weapons systems, creates more volume inside for power cores, capacitors, etc. since a sphere is the most efficient container, it reduces the power required to turn the thing due to reduced rotational torque, and the outer plated shell will absorb impacts and energy blasts much more efficiently by spreading out the impact/energy over a larger surface area (even deflecting a lot of it due to the curved nature of the sphere). The defensive energy shielding would also be more efficient and stronger since field strength would follow the shape of a sphere's more efficient and compact surface area equation rather than the more expansive cylindrical equations of other's ships. I think the 'psychically linked' Drone idea for a carrier sphere is a great idea, but make the control systems ship based and CNC scale-able and transferable when one carrier is disabled. This could easily be accomplished with hive communication technology. I think the drones should have 6 relatively small multi-directional engines set at the apexes of an inscribed cube within the fighter sphere giving it extreme thrust for its size and major directional thrust for maneuverability (like a simple raised 4 opening pillbox design) which would eliminate the need for massive numbers of thrusters and make the drones capable of bouncing around space like a super-ball. Of course it would need a mini Progen server so it could coordinate all the multi-threaded commands coming in over the psionic receiver. It could have 6 equally spaced Progen capacitors to absorb energy hits when the shields fold (shield generator) and provide energy for sustained fire, mini photon lasers (pairs that can be slightly independently aimed or used in double barreled synchronous mode for more sustained power on target). Say 10 pairs on a sphere set equally apart from each other (simply rotating the fighter droid sphere would allow for continuous fire rates) so half of them could be concentrated on any one target if need be. Of course, a centralized Progen power core. And it should have 10 sets of Dana's new and improved Gauss Cannons on high speed gimbal mounts. You would need one pilot, one tactical officer/captain, and 4 gunners (2 Gauss and 2 photon) for full coverage without overloading a gunner. Such spherical fighter droids would need be no larger than the Raptor but be even more maneuverable with loads more firepower. It would be easy for Faye to pilot them. I am thinking 9 droids, 3 wings of 3 each in a triangular orientation with one command module with hive technology so only 3 Faye's would be needed (1 pilot, two gunners). Would be one heck of a force multiplier for the Invictus.
PLRus--Founding member of the TSM F5 club.
2017-12-20 20:29:51 +0000 UTCI don't know as that's necessary, either works
2017-12-20 11:36:34 +0000 UTCThe Maliri and Trankaran languages are probably derived from Progenitor... what's the point of creating vassals if they can't understand your orders? Even Drakar would share a common bastardised root. Do the Ashanath have a spoken language or is it exclusively mindspeak amongst themselves?
2017-12-20 08:09:38 +0000 UTCcorrection: "She nodded, respect and admiration in her eyes. " (sentence fragment) -> "She nodded, with respect and admiration in her eyes." Pg 39
GrandPaM
2017-12-20 06:06:25 +0000 UTCI like to think that actually the galactic standard language is ancient Progenitor. It would make sense when you consider the progenitors had a major presence with most of the races in the area, and that humans adopted the standard language at some point in the past for ease of communication.
Muninn
2017-12-20 06:04:22 +0000 UTCI'll try for before Xmas, but it's going to be tight. If not, it'll be by the end of the month.
Tefler
2017-12-19 23:30:41 +0000 UTCI don't think you're alone regarding Faye! Glad you liked the latest chapter. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-19 23:30:07 +0000 UTCSorry for being nitpicky, but I'm surprised none of the girls screamed or exclaimed in their native tongue. More importantly I get the other species speaking English to humans, but I kinda doubt the dragons or brimorians would (I'd imagine they'd prefer a translator rather than learning the filthy human tongue). It would be easy to understand I John is psychically translaing in some cases, but when he's not there it wouldn't make sense. Also if the dragons are speaking their native tongue then I would doubt the translation having a lisp...
cp
2017-12-19 23:10:10 +0000 UTCWhen is 97 due?
2017-12-19 21:47:40 +0000 UTCAwesome chapter Tefler! It's funny that with all that's going on in the story at the moment, what i'm most looking forward to is John's first encounter with the "new" Faye.
doofus67
2017-12-19 16:43:38 +0000 UTCNo new scenes, just a few more bits added to existing ones (continuity fixes and setting something up for chapter 97).
Tefler
2017-12-19 14:37:26 +0000 UTCThanks, fixed those!
Tefler
2017-12-19 14:36:33 +0000 UTCTefler, you missed one mention of a black sword ( when Luna is testing the invictium sword)
Kin Asdi
2017-12-19 13:58:47 +0000 UTCCouncillor Talari exclaimed, his diminutive grey face looked aghast. -> Councillor Talari exclaimed, his diminutive grey face looking aghast. Or make it two sentences. Most old beyond our reckoning. -> Most are old beyond our reckoning.
Evan
2017-12-19 05:00:14 +0000 UTCTefler, with today's drop of Chapter 96, are there any new scenes, or just a bunch of edits to existing ones? I just want to know what to look for when I re-read it when I've a chance.
Evan
2017-12-18 18:57:13 +0000 UTCI just uploaded a new version that fixed all the errors pointed out by everyone and added some additional stuff from editor feedback. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-18 18:53:01 +0000 UTCAnother amazing chapter, the only thing I hope is that it doesn't take much longer for High Command to get what's coming to them! When John and the crew find out what they have been up to it's going to be epic!
Raymond Jeffries
2017-12-18 18:01:45 +0000 UTCHoly shitballs, Tefler! I just got through reading Chapter 96, but I had to catch up from being three chapters behind (I had gone back to the very beginning for a reread, and didn't want to read 94 onward until I got to them in order), and I gotta say I was impressed as always. I can't point out any typos or inconsistencies as others have done, mainly because after the first few pages I get so immersed in the story itself that I lose sight of such things, but I will chime in and say that I can't wait to see Faye finally using her new body to have fun with John and the girls. I also hope that just as John let Sakura find the closure that she needed by dealing with Mikaboshi personally, so too will he give Jade the oppurtunity to personally deal with the Evil Admiral and the Mad Scientist so that she can atone for her own feelings of having failed her people. BTW, I wasn't sure if you had seen it, but just for fun, I also posted a suggestion for the next time Dana feels like upgrading the Paragon Armour. I posted it in the Commissioned Art section, on the pic of Alyssa in the Paragon Armor with the helmet. If you're interested, take a quick look at these GIFs, I'm sure you'll get the idea. :) <a href="https://media.giphy.com/media/Y005zEyiwXrpu/giphy.gif" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://media.giphy.com/media/Y005zEyiwXrpu/giphy.gif</a> <a href="https://media.giphy.com/media/Dm1SYEv8Qn6vu/giphy.gif" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://media.giphy.com/media/Dm1SYEv8Qn6vu/giphy.gif</a> In any case, keep up the great work.
2017-12-18 13:45:20 +0000 UTCThe first scene when Alyssa is with the Ashanath is all normal speach but the scene in ch95 where she found them you changed their interactions to telepathic speach. So, presumably, this should all be telepathic speach as well.
ringill
2017-12-18 10:11:49 +0000 UTCThat's a good point, thanks. I'll clear that up!
Tefler
2017-12-18 09:48:46 +0000 UTCSeems like Jade's sisters will join John ( no other place will be safer than that) and Jade will become a Matriarch with a handful of lennarans( don't remember the spelling) under her.
2017-12-18 04:54:20 +0000 UTCTefler, may I be so bold as to give a bit of constructive criticism? It is a minor thing, but after John makes the bird for Valani, it just gets forgotten in the narrative from that point on. Did she leave it in the cargo hold? Did she leave it in the Dojo? To be so precious to her I would think its disposition would be mentioned. I would think Valani would put it in a safe place...it was a gift from John... It just seemed to be an abrupt hole in the script for me.
PLRus--Founding member of the TSM F5 club.
2017-12-18 03:14:44 +0000 UTCYes, I hope for a rather painful death for Buckingham and Webber...
2017-12-18 03:02:29 +0000 UTCThat's been going on for awhile. No clue why, but likely something on Patreon's side. It is indeed a .docx file, but for some reason, computers aren't recognizing it as such. You have to tell your computer to open it in Word when you download it, or otherwise find where it was downloaded to, then go to that spot from within Word and then open the file.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-18 02:53:38 +0000 UTCI've have the problem of it seems to download a .zip file instead of the .docx file. Any idea what's going on?
Terra_Lupis
2017-12-18 02:49:41 +0000 UTCIsn't he & the girls already giving millions for human orphans ? Also the free medical cures from Rachel . I really don't think Buckingham is reasoning this through , even if he is successful in defending Terra how can he clam he asked John for help while he's keeping the Kintark destruction of the Dragon March & the invasion secret , & how will he defend the abandonment of the outer worlds to the Kirrix ? I believe his fear of losing power have stripped his common sense & when it becomes known what he's up to with Jehanna & the Nymphs he will lose all support . I do hope Weber & the scientist are left to Jade to deal with , she needs to feel like she's rescuing her sisters to make up for her sadness on thinking she had let them down .
bigdawguw65
2017-12-18 00:22:01 +0000 UTCThat's a British expression. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-17 23:27:58 +0000 UTCit’s a good ( job) you’re wearing tickle-proof armour...thing. or is that a brit expression
2017-12-17 23:24:05 +0000 UTCNot sure if anyone has brought this up but it does seem like BSP is now having sexy relations with his matriarch more than he use to (the occasional feeding to keep her young). Has he observed what John has been doing with his ladies and see's the potential for this style of ruling his thralls?
rich ed
2017-12-17 22:29:27 +0000 UTCRamen sex... I hadn't heard that before, so I had to google that one. :-) It's back to the regular girls now, so no more of that! Faye's in the next chapter, I've just been writing scenes for her.
Tefler
2017-12-17 21:14:35 +0000 UTC"...hope for the future in the first time I can..." for?
zingowner
2017-12-17 21:13:19 +0000 UTCI love Tombstone! There are so many amazing one liners in that movie! It's hard to say if it's my favourite, because I really like the spaghetti western trilogy! I enjoyed the revenge theme of pale rider a lot, that's a great movie as well. The final shootout of Unforgiven is also very cool, but not enough to compensate for the slower pace in the rest of it. All imho of course... :-)
Tefler
2017-12-17 21:11:51 +0000 UTCI did a quick recount and it should actually be 14: The Invictus girls (8) Alyssa, Calara, Dana, Jade, Rachel, Irillith, Sakura, Tashana The Maliri (6) Edraele, Luna, Nyrelle, Valani, Tsarra, Leena. Kali was still on the bed behind him. :-) Thanks for bringing my attention to it!
Tefler
2017-12-17 21:06:14 +0000 UTCHonestly the repetitive ramen sex scenes of the last two chapters have felt.... Off. I am a bit sad that fay will be ignored again with her new body and all as they race to save and rescue everyone.
Grimlakin
2017-12-17 20:51:24 +0000 UTC"...carnivores and we have had been forced..." have been?
zingowner
2017-12-17 20:51:13 +0000 UTCI'm just waiting for the scene.. John on a communicator after demolishing this base and rescuing the captives. Talking to a representative of the admiralty. "YOU TELL BUCKINGHAM I'M COMING, AND I'M BRINGING HELL WITH ME!!!" to loosely quote. My favorite western movie. ;)
Grimlakin
2017-12-17 20:50:27 +0000 UTCNot sure if this has been addressed yet, But the number of girls present at the end seems off. From the given count of 19, Jehanna, Niskara, Almari, and Illyana are missing, so shouldn't it be 15 instead of 16? Sorry if I'm missing something obvious, and great chapter Tefler!
ncamferd
2017-12-17 20:39:04 +0000 UTCI think "ruthlessly close her" should be chase
2017-12-17 20:29:08 +0000 UTCBah. John would be like, not on my starship, and res them, anyway...
2017-12-17 17:54:41 +0000 UTCI agree that the crazy evil German mad scientist trope is overused.
Steven Allen
2017-12-17 16:13:12 +0000 UTCTension is really ratcheting up. I am liking it, but getting increasingly worried one of the girls isn't going to make it once everything comes to a head. Fingers crossed that Tefler doesn't need to kill someone off to move the story forward.
Hunter
2017-12-17 16:10:15 +0000 UTCOfcourse the evil and psychotic scientist ist German... #notallgermans
Mapstar
2017-12-17 13:46:07 +0000 UTCWould that be before or after John and Co. waltz thru all those defenses?
Jedi Khan
2017-12-17 10:38:21 +0000 UTCI can't wait to read the look on Weber's face when John comes down to "pick Jenna up"
2017-12-17 10:26:12 +0000 UTCIf PJ is hiding John's power level from others, then how are the Astral monsters finding him? What if John's power is on such a high level that others who aren't on the same level can't detect it simply because their mind can't comprehend, and therefore won't accept, such high power? Kinda like when they first installed the Ashanath power core, it was putting out so much power that it didn't register on Dana's output charts until she adjusted the scale.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-17 08:38:12 +0000 UTCIt just occurred to me, since presumably Progenitor John is blocking John from revealing his psychic energy to others like Alyssa has done with the Ashanath. Alyssa's energy is a radiating golden light. What would Johns be? Maybe a blue, calm as a storm in a horizon but as terrifying as a cyclone if provoked. Glorious in his protective nature to his girls and friends and as beautiful as a pulsar (the kind of hue I'm imagining). Alyssa's energy is the light of the sun bright and as hot as they come. My idea for John compliments that.
Forbsey
2017-12-17 08:27:00 +0000 UTCI think it would be beneficial for the leader of the Terrans (maybe Charles) after this has all finished to be aware of humanity's history, namely that Maelnerak created humanity with progenitor template. Only the Leader would be privy to the information though.
Forbsey
2017-12-17 08:05:53 +0000 UTCOh thats Fked, Dana would learn it and make it even more powerful.
Forbsey
2017-12-17 08:03:45 +0000 UTCInvictium is black and stays black when shaped with a psi shaper but becomes white when shaped by psychic powers which is when it becomes Alyssium. Crystal Alyssium is white by default and, as we've just found, can be psychically coloured as well so the Invictus could be turned pink after all! Actually it does mean they could now get coloured body armour if they want a variant that's more stealthy.
ringill
2017-12-17 07:34:31 +0000 UTCThat was a close to perfect chapter. You are doing an excellent job managing all the different plot points and building the tension The ashanath getting overwhelmed by Alyssa's charms was amusing, and it was good to get more background on the astral plane. So is Nyarlathotep just defending its territory from invasion, or actively seeking out psychics to feed on? I really liked how you gave each of the young matriarchs a different personality, and put effort into fleshing out their stories, I don't know if the people they rule will be happy about them living on Valaden permanently. The Brimorians seem pretty cagey, but something fishy is going on in the deep pool. Can't wait for Jade to finish the destruction of Titan. The Grey Knights are lame anyways.
2017-12-17 06:22:00 +0000 UTCCh. 96 is awesome...just sets the stage for so much more!!!!!
Arrowglass
2017-12-17 05:09:43 +0000 UTCJade is going to be very angry. I don't think they'll like her when she's angry.
VycronDyz
2017-12-17 04:50:01 +0000 UTCSo...who wants one of these? <a href="https://youtu.be/uifFH9gfMto" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://youtu.be/uifFH9gfMto</a> Dana does, I bet.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-17 02:57:27 +0000 UTCThat would be kindof hilarious. I AM BIG BAD KINTARK MAN!!! (john) -- Meet my little kitty -- Jade, come here, please...
Florida Reader
2017-12-17 01:45:33 +0000 UTCI don't think they lost an engine in that fight with the Kirrix, only the heavy cannon. Apparently it's not that high of a priority to get that replaced at the moment, although I have a feeling they'll be missing that extra gun soon.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-17 01:26:28 +0000 UTCWhat happened to heading to a dry dock, or a tender ship, to repair the ship? (-1 heavy cannon, and down one main drive)
2017-12-17 01:23:56 +0000 UTCAnd in comes the Terran fanatics. Lol. Xeno lover.
2017-12-17 01:19:12 +0000 UTCHow big is the Kintark Emperor? And how big of a Rex can Jade become? Would we get a version of Godzilla duel?
Big Orca
2017-12-17 01:07:23 +0000 UTCDepends if he was on manoeuvres
2017-12-16 23:11:34 +0000 UTCHopefully she can reach out with her mind and find her like she did at the end of the last chapter
Mark Hall
2017-12-16 22:25:05 +0000 UTCTartarus sauce!
Roethan
2017-12-16 22:15:08 +0000 UTCI thought they did meet.
Chris
2017-12-16 22:11:11 +0000 UTCYea I noticed, hopefully it’s addressed in the next chapter, otherwise Tef needs to do an add-in.
Koa
2017-12-16 21:06:32 +0000 UTC"... lazy circle around her naval, ..." should be navel.
eggman
2017-12-16 20:12:13 +0000 UTCFantastic chapter again Tefler! I do like the subtle hints you gave away knowing that it all will come together to a grant Finale! One thing though: I thought that both Invictium and Crystal Alyssium were black and they change to white when shaped into a form?
Kin Asdi
2017-12-16 19:38:57 +0000 UTCDoes anyone else think Luna and Yamamoto should meet so he realizes how much further he could take his training?
2017-12-16 19:32:01 +0000 UTCWell I just finished the story I do believe that high command will die
Mark Hall
2017-12-16 18:51:16 +0000 UTCOoh Tefler. You usually accomplish to keep me on my toes with curiosity at the end of a chapter. And that makes me love this receiving one chapter at a time quite much. But at the end of this chapter these Admirals just made me genuinely angry and upset when jehanna and torture and harsh interrogation came up. I needed quite some minutes to calm down. Not many storys happened to let me react that emotional. So today I absolutely hate that I have to wait around 2 weeks for the next chapter while there is simmering a spark of anger and apprehension inside of me. You did an amazing job there. I feel so much with your Charakters. Thank you! But the storyline creeps. You keep us on our toes and the climax will make itself scarce for another some chapters. I am overwhelmed atm. And so excited about seeing how you pull all of these numerous strings together that you are laying out now.
MaydaysSin
2017-12-16 18:45:59 +0000 UTCGreat chapter. I wonder if Jehanna is connected to Alyssa so that she can be rescued similar to Calara when abducted by the cyborg ninjas. Not sure that Jehanna has consumed enough to be connected to Alyssa strong enough for the tether to be strong enough to follow.
Steven Allen
2017-12-16 18:27:43 +0000 UTCAnother outstanding chapter Tefler! Lots of great plot arcs; and I loved the revelations of Faye finally getting to try out her new body. Really loved it, and it gave me such a laugh at the end. I just kept saying to myself, "Carl, you are going to be SO screwed! Best wishes for the holidays, and a Happy New Year!
2017-12-16 17:53:26 +0000 UTCGreat Chapter, Thank you Tefler. Happy Holidays and a Great New Year to All.
2017-12-16 17:09:04 +0000 UTCHasn't anyone noticed yet that John and Alyssa's conversation regarding the Astral monsters seemed to be moving foward to a solid plan curiously not mentioned? This plan seems to be coming soon, maybe after the immediate problems.
Forbsey
2017-12-16 16:51:55 +0000 UTCWonderful chapter , just enough set up among the diverse threads & lots of interpersonal connections & back story illumination . Really setting up a monumental Battle for not only survival of lives but the very soul of the T Fed & humanity . The High command reeks of everything we (hopefully good people) hate when looking at human frailty . You can see how maybe good men were ready to revolt . Sad that Norwood is such a fool but sometimes zealots can't see reality even when staring at it . My last thought about the scene between Weber & the Dr "yea these guys are fucked " Bravo Tefler Christmas now holds so much promise .
bigdawguw65
2017-12-16 15:38:39 +0000 UTCThe new chapter with all of the separate plot arcs simply adds additional spice to the over all story. I like it! I'm not confused by them. As I got toward the end I kept saying "I know this is going to be another 'cliff hanger' and sure enough, was not disappointed. But, DAMN man once in awhile you need to leave us not gasping for breath. Some of us are old folks and can handle only so much excitement..... BUT, don't you dare stop! I will, as I have since the beginning, continue supporting and encouraging you!!!
2017-12-16 14:43:08 +0000 UTCContinue to be awesome tef!
Joel San Buenaventura
2017-12-16 12:57:54 +0000 UTCChapter 100 is quite the milestone. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-16 12:50:17 +0000 UTCThanks Kevin, I updated the overview. :-) When I was writing the researcher character, I figured there were a couple of potentially interesting ways I could go with him. 1) Make him sympathetic to his charges, to make him a bit more morally grey. 2) Make him devoid of empathy, to make him more evil and a bigger threat (to Jehanna and the Nymphs). TSM isn't really about morally grey characters in the way that say GoT is, so that made me lean towards the second option. He's also a Xeno-researcher for the military and considering the very unpleasant things he would have had to have done to get to that position, option two seemed the more plausible.
Tefler
2017-12-16 12:48:05 +0000 UTCAnother excellent step on the journey although I'm not totally sure I should be congratulating you on the apparent second coming of Dr. Mengele. Btw, you might want to update the Overview since, apparently, you're working on CH.95!
ringill
2017-12-16 12:23:25 +0000 UTCThey have been quite naughty... :-/
Tefler
2017-12-16 12:19:11 +0000 UTCYou're welcome Ed!
Tefler
2017-12-16 12:18:29 +0000 UTCOops, sorry about that!
Tefler
2017-12-16 12:14:58 +0000 UTCThanks Ben! I wasn't sure about putting too many PoVs in... they help push separate plot arcs along, but I'm wary about making the story feel like it's jumping around all over the place. As long as it's not too confusing to keep track of it all when you guys read it, then I'm happy!
Tefler
2017-12-16 12:09:51 +0000 UTCExcellent continuity spot, well done!
Tefler
2017-12-16 12:07:07 +0000 UTCI'm thinking it must all be lining up for Chapter 100 to be a Blockbuster space battle
2017-12-16 12:02:33 +0000 UTCThere's still life in the old fella at the moment. :-) I'll see what I can do about ch97 for xmas...
Tefler
2017-12-16 11:58:29 +0000 UTCThanks Evan! Yeah, there's quite a few separate story arcs which will be gathering together soon, which is why I've been doing more PoV scenes: 1) The Invictus crew (obviously!) 2) Buckingham and co. 3) Dave Gibbons 4) Charles and Olympus station 5) The Kintark 6) Jehanna 7) The Nymphs 8) The Brimorians 9) BSP 10) The Kirrix Phew! No wonder I've had to make quite a few notes. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-16 11:56:20 +0000 UTCI think I commented on an earlier post I wasn't sure what scene to end it on. That final scene could have started off chapter 97, but I wanted to just follow up on what had happened to Jehanna!
Tefler
2017-12-16 11:52:42 +0000 UTCGreat, thank you!
Tefler
2017-12-16 11:50:45 +0000 UTCI think I'm keeping a good track of them, hopefully I'll be able to wrap a bunch up in the upcoming few chapters. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-16 11:50:26 +0000 UTCThanks Roy, it's always really nice to hear that patrons have enjoyed a chapter. I have you have a Happy Christmas too. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-16 11:48:00 +0000 UTCOkay, I'll get cracking!
Tefler
2017-12-16 11:45:38 +0000 UTCI did. If you read the webcomic Schlock Mercenary (schlockmercenary.com) they have a recurring joke about iconic movie scenes: "The second panel's resemblance to the Lion King "Pride Rock" tableau is illustrative of a little known derivation of Eddington's Law (wherein an infinite number of monkeys at typewriters eventually bash out the script for Hamlet) in which in an infinite universe, with an infinite number of points of view upon an infinite number of vistas, eventually you'll recreate all the great movie posters of the 20th century. The above can be considered a near miss, due to the absence of giraffes. Keep trying, universe! You're almost there!" (from <a href="https://www.schlockmercenary.com/2003-11-30" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://www.schlockmercenary.com/2003-11-30</a> , a rather old strip his illustrations have gotten better in the last 14 years)
Malthe Mørk Mejlby
2017-12-16 09:47:14 +0000 UTCGod damm it tefler I finished reading your awesome story now I can't sleep
2017-12-16 08:48:30 +0000 UTCDid anyone else picture that scene from The Lion King when the artwork Tsarra made was described? I don't suppose you've been watching old Disney movies of late, have you Tef?
Jedi Khan
2017-12-16 08:45:01 +0000 UTCIt is a great chapter with a lot of build up happening around the part of the galaxy and John is unware of it. Young matriarchs are lovely. Loved the sword fight session between Luna and Sakura. I am waiting for that scene for long time. Now I am waiting for Jade Titanosaur & John & Family Vs Vincent & Weber. (God vs Cretins) also Terran vs Kintark.
2017-12-16 08:42:10 +0000 UTC*sharp electric crackle* No Crazy, that's a taser not a defibrillator. You're more likely to stop Kim's heart with that than you are to start it.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-16 08:39:41 +0000 UTCVery nice, thank you! Fixed it. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-16 08:28:48 +0000 UTCNo, she's not. It takes 3 doses of John's spunk to connect a girl to Alyssa, with Jade and Niskera being the exceptions (one dose). Jehenna only got two doses.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-16 08:27:17 +0000 UTCThe last chapter would end book 17, so this was the start of book 18. Port Medea getting blown to bits was like basically the "mid-season finale" in a longer story arc than normal. Because it was a relatively quiet period for John and co (meeting the Young Matriarchs), I added a relatively short sub-story with the three cruiser captains in the Dragon March. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-16 08:23:18 +0000 UTCEnding last chapter with a cliffhanger then this chapter undermining the cliff 😀 Brilliant and very enjoyable. The young matriarchs are really lovely and spirited girls. Enjoyed the interlude - good way to catch up with time. Now get up on the horse and start writing.😬 Desperately need another fix for Christmas or I will need Crazy with charged pads.
Kim Biel-Nielsen
2017-12-16 08:18:04 +0000 UTCIsnt jehanna connetcted mentally to alyssa
2017-12-16 08:13:14 +0000 UTCJohn will turn them into tartar sauce! 😠
2017-12-16 07:55:40 +0000 UTCOk Webber and Buckingham need to die, preferably by a slow and extremely painful process. Maby John should have THEM impregnated by some Kirix!
Amathew2
2017-12-16 07:31:11 +0000 UTCthe sword metal changed from invictium to onyxium
keen_FlattendHedgeHog
2017-12-16 07:15:13 +0000 UTCso close for Faye, yet so far away. next chapter Faye centre stage I suspect, well the first 1/4 at least. another great chapter, thank you muchly
rich ed
2017-12-16 07:05:48 +0000 UTCGotta say, this was an odd chapter after the last one. Not quite as much impact or as hard hitting. If 3SM was a roller coaster, the last chapter was a series of loops and turns with some sudden drops, whereas this chapter is more like being half way up a slow, tortuous climb to the top of a hill just before a big drop. And very good job with that guy at the end. It's not easy to make a character that everyone would love to see burn in the fires of hell the moment they meet him. Given the update we got from Charles Harris, I have a feeling that the upgraded ships, including the Claymore fighters of the carriers, will help make the coming battle more of a balanced tug of war than the one sided slaughter it appears to be. I just hope that enough ships have been upgraded to make a difference. And unless someone tips John off to the looming threat and/or tells him Jehenna's gone missing, I don't think he or anyone else will be coming to the rescue. It doesn't even have to be one of the admirals to tip him off; it could be Calara's father, who sends him a quick message saying "High Command's abandoned the outer rim, what's up?" That should be enough to get John's attention, if not to get him to head for Terra immediately, at least to have Faye and Irillith dive the TFed network for orders that Calara can then piece together. If John doesn't make it in time, the Maliri definitely won't, as they're even farther from Terra than John is and going the opposite direction.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-16 06:14:30 +0000 UTCYeah....and it will be at least two chapters until that is resolved.
PLRus--Founding member of the TSM F5 club.
2017-12-16 06:07:58 +0000 UTCAnybody else fed up with the admirals?
2017-12-16 06:03:55 +0000 UTCWhich Progenitor though? We don't know who John's father is. It could be Mael'Nerak, it could be the BSP (Black Ship Progenitor) who's been mucking up the empires, or it could be yet another, unknown Progenitor.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-16 05:49:06 +0000 UTCThe Stallion Who Mounts the Galaxy???
Florida Reader
2017-12-16 05:14:44 +0000 UTCSo does anyone think the other progenitor’s toy is John’s mother? Just a thought.
Florida Reader
2017-12-16 05:10:22 +0000 UTCJust think of the Empire Strikes Back .... Dark but oh so good. It sets up contrast for the inevitable triumph
Florida Reader
2017-12-16 05:08:18 +0000 UTCSo many wonderful ways to build up the tension. Fabulous chapter and I loved the way things wrapped up with the Matriachs. Also, the two holograms was a beautiful touch. It makes me wonder if we'll ever find out the Maliri word for stallion... not that John needs another nickname. LOL
LunarLilith
2017-12-16 05:04:29 +0000 UTCAwesome so much for getting to bed early tonight
Steven Allen
2017-12-16 04:58:59 +0000 UTCI know what I want for Christmas now ch 97 and Buckingham’s death preferably slow and painful.
Jim lynch
2017-12-16 04:37:38 +0000 UTCWorm hole
Jim lynch
2017-12-16 04:35:25 +0000 UTCI am hoping Jade gets to play with the mad doctor before she kills her prey. As for Weber, anything less than Alyssa slowly squeezing his mind into a deep dark hole as he howls his anguish, knowing he will die slowly, hoplessly imprisioned in his own mind would be a dissappointment. As for Buckie....he just needs to die.
PLRus--Founding member of the TSM F5 club.
2017-12-16 04:34:49 +0000 UTCI kept vigil for us Jedi.
PLRus--Founding member of the TSM F5 club.
2017-12-16 04:25:24 +0000 UTCYessss:............
Kim Biel-Nielsen
2017-12-16 04:00:22 +0000 UTCThis is rapidly becoming a very dark, very different story than it started as. I don't know how much longer I will continue to read it. It is becoming very sinister. Not very happy at the moment.
2017-12-16 03:28:25 +0000 UTCNo connection, why would she?
2017-12-16 03:22:10 +0000 UTCNo resolution to any of the prior chapters cliff hangers...
2017-12-16 03:17:49 +0000 UTCAn extremely good bridging chapter, Tefler, bringing the various plot lines closer together. I look forward to seeing how you continue to develop this.
Evan
2017-12-16 03:05:02 +0000 UTCWhat a fucking wonderful place to end it. Perfect mental images to fall asleep with. Can't wait for the next chapter.
Malthe Mørk Mejlby
2017-12-16 03:03:54 +0000 UTCSo I can understand that at the time of the abduction Alyssa was with the Ashanath, so she missed that, but why hasn't she felt Jehanna's distress yet? Unless it comes up in the next chapter considering the location of Tartarus
2017-12-16 02:51:09 +0000 UTCenforce your ban them -> enforce your ban on them ??
Evan
2017-12-16 02:45:34 +0000 UTCDana really needs to unlock that Black Hole teleporty type drive ASAP. They've got appointments all over the place!
James Glass
2017-12-16 02:33:33 +0000 UTCViscious vs vicious at one point
Wookey
2017-12-16 02:26:19 +0000 UTCNo, it’s spelt Wookey
Wookey
2017-12-16 02:25:16 +0000 UTCSo many loose ends. Am looking forward to the Christmas edition already!!
Wookey
2017-12-16 02:24:27 +0000 UTCI wonder which of Weber and Dr Evil he has there will end up dead first.
2017-12-16 02:13:48 +0000 UTCI love reading your work. And it's the eldritch icing on the cake when you deliver when you predict you will. Happy Holidays to You and Yours!
Roy Meyer
2017-12-16 01:57:34 +0000 UTCWell spotted, thank you! :-)
Tefler
2017-12-16 01:55:34 +0000 UTCAh yes, very good!
Tefler
2017-12-16 01:54:50 +0000 UTCThere's a timeline of events and things need to be set up in advance before the big battle that's brewing. To use the tvshow example, the last chapter was like the mid-season finale, with this chapter the last build chapter before the action starts ramping up again. Plus I didn't want to just rush through him knocking up the Young Matriarchs. It might seen like it's incidental to the story, but it's a profound change for John, finally getting some girls pregnant. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-16 01:54:03 +0000 UTCPage 1: "Every few decades some of our people decided to mount an..." Should be "decide," rather than "decided," considering in the context it's a recurring event, therefore should be present tense rather than past.
Jedi Khan
2017-12-16 01:51:32 +0000 UTCsaving your life of theirs -> saving your life or theirs ??
Evan
2017-12-16 01:47:12 +0000 UTCSo... When can we expect chapter 97? Lol. Haven't even read 96 yet and already I want more.
2017-12-16 01:41:13 +0000 UTCFantastic. well here I go
Jim lynch
2017-12-16 01:36:42 +0000 UTCSweet new chapter and Star Wars on the same day. Is it my birthday and nobody told me?
Chris
2017-12-16 01:19:42 +0000 UTCYou're welcome guys, I hope you enjoy the chapter!
Tefler
2017-12-16 01:19:40 +0000 UTCYep, off to bed in a mo...
Tefler
2017-12-16 01:19:23 +0000 UTClol well done. :-)
Tefler
2017-12-16 01:19:10 +0000 UTCAwww yissss!!! Thanks Tef! Keep up the great work.
2017-12-16 01:12:08 +0000 UTCYes!!
Amathew2
2017-12-16 01:10:06 +0000 UTCFuck yeah!
2017-12-16 01:09:54 +0000 UTCWoo hoo
Muledrvr
2017-12-16 01:09:37 +0000 UTCGood timing, still early in Arizona.
Old Cruiser
2017-12-16 01:08:51 +0000 UTCcheers mister
Braw
2017-12-16 01:08:22 +0000 UTCnext!
GrandPaM
2017-12-16 01:07:52 +0000 UTCdamn near broke the space time continuum getting to work and logging in. At least I got this spot
Jedi Khan
2017-12-16 01:07:30 +0000 UTCThank you, Tefler! Now, go get some sleep! :-)
Evan
2017-12-16 01:06:59 +0000 UTCThanks!!!
Anthony Kester
2017-12-16 01:06:47 +0000 UTCFirst! HAHAHAHAHA
PLRus--Founding member of the TSM F5 club.
2017-12-16 01:06:15 +0000 UTC