This ISN'T The "Real-Life" Buzz Lightyear! (VIDEO SCRIPT)

Readers, it has been almost an entire year since we first got word Disney/Pixar was expanding on the Toy Story IP by making an origin movie for Buzz Lightyear

Then on October 28th 2021, the teaser trailer for the movie dropped, and Disney/Pixar’s Lightyear became the name on everyone’s lips. For better, or for worse

I only say that because I know how the internet works by now.

On one hand, yes; the trailer looks absolutely stunning.

/The details in Buzz’s titular outfit, the cinematography, everything looks like what you’d imagine a movie that tells the origin of Buzz Lightyear would be like/

It also meant that thanks to one scene in the trailer in particular, the memes would start a-comin’. And oh, did they start a-comin’

On the other hand, the release of the trailer left a lot of people who didn’t know that this film was coming, VERY confused.

And while part of this was human error ala misinterpretation of how the trailer was initially marketed by some media outlets, it still surprised me to see just how many people were debating not just the legitimacy of where the movie stood in comparison to the four Toy Story films, but didn’t know how to properly interpret its existence thanks to the quote-unquote changes that were made.

So while I definitely did my part to quiet the discourse on Twitter the day the trailer dropped, I realized... God damn it, this can be a video.

So if you’ll allow me, let me be your guide to understanding exactly where Disney Pixar’s Lightyear stands in the universe of Toy Story

It’s like I stated before, Readers; one of the main reasons for the communication regarding Lightyear is how some media outlets chose to market the trailer, versus members of the general public not necessarily getting the gist of what they were going with

The thing about it is that the confusion isn’t coming from the media outlets that aren’t labeled reliable sources, either. They’re coming from tweets from like Hollywood Reporter and Vanity Fair

/Variety tweeted out the day the trailer launched that it introduces the real-life human astronaut that inspired the Buzz Lightyear toy line, resulting in over a thousand quote retweets of people trying to make sense of what this means/

Because despite putting the words real life in quotation in order to insinuate a different meaning of the phrase, people saw tweets like this, peeped the phrasing, and were like...

Wait. Buzz Lightyear actually EXISTS in Toy Story? Like, a REAL PERSON??

...No, I’m not making this up; that’s ACTUALLY what happened the day the trailer dropped

People young and old, rich and poor, black and white, dog dads and cat dads alike all made their confusion known regarding the stance of whether or not there was a REAL Buzz Lightyear in the universe of Toy Story

Even prominent YouTubers were confused and thought there was an actual astronaut in the Toy Story universe that the Buzz Lightyear toy was based on

JoCat, who you all may know as the YouTuber who created the Crap Guide to D&D series was tweeting up a storm the day the trailer dropped basically demanding answers regarding whether or not this was how the news was supposed to be taken

And I was watching him do it. Not because he does not know me and wouldn’t take heed of my explanation of the events that had transpired because of such an obstacle. But because...despite my eagerness to inform the masses, there was -- and is -- a part of me that takes slight pleasure...in watching one go mad from ignorance

...Sorry about that; I went to the Vincent Price part of my brain. My apologies; you weren’t supposed to see that. But YES, that actually happened.

So if it happened to him, you can only imagine how many MORE people the misdirect affected!

Fortunately, that didn’t happen to me. Because I knew better. And the reason WHY I knew better, was because of two things

One: Keeping up with the initial announcement that Pixar was working on the movie months before the trailer dropped

And Two: The fact that the movie Toy Story 2 exists.

So let’s get this out of the way now, before I provide the proper context necessary to explain EVERYTHING.

There is no REAL Buzz Lightyear in the universe of Toy Story.

In-universe, Buzz Lightyear is a fictional character, and isn’t inspired by an actual astronaut in-universe.

We know this, because during Disney Investor Day 2020 when it was revealed Pixar was working on a Lightyear solo movie...

/THIS was stated/(We designed Buzz Lightyear...it’s time to make that film)

Now to be fair, while the entirety of D.I.D. 2020 was streamed online and made available to the public, the whole thing was about 3 and a half hours long.

And in the defense of people who didn’t have IMMEDIATE access to it, that information regarding the stance of Lightyear didn’t drop until 2 and a half hours into the overall presentation.

Also, that articulation didn’t necessarily translate to how it was initially promoted upon its reveal. Especially from Buzz’s NEW voice, Chris Evans:

/Who said, and I quote, “this isn’t Buzz Lightyear the toy. This is the origin story of the human Buzz Lightyear that the toy is based on.” Endquote/

As I showed earlier, this made things even MORE confusing to some people when the actual trailer came out and media outlets started to promote it as the origin story for the REAL Buzz Lightyear.

And while the majority of them decided to put the world real in quotation marks to A, try and minimize confusion...

And B, participate in the whole “Buzz Lightyear thinks he’s real” gimmick he’s originally known for, it’s clear...from what I’ve seen...that not everybody got it

So for everyone who’s been affected by this and came across this video: Hi there. Remember Toy Story 2?

/Remember when Woody discovered there was an entire in-universe franchise dedicated to the persona his existence is based on?/

/That he found out there was a whole-ass television series based on said persona that humans in the universe of Toy Story would regularly watch back when people whistled the theme song to the Andy Griffith Show?/

If you saw that back in the day -- or recently, whatever; I don’t know your life -- and were able to understand that, then CONGRATULATIONS! You now know the mathematical equation

/“Lightyear” is to Buzz, as “Woody’s Roundup” is to Woody/

And yes, you can make the same equation with the Buzz Lightyear of Star Command movie and tv show...

/A children’s show that was created that may or may not have ANY ties to its live-action theatrical counterpart like a lot of the ones WE experienced growing up -- and come to the same result/

What’s actually funny about ALL of this, is that this is kinda what Toy Story 3 was originally gonna be about.

Before deciding to prioritize on other projects back when Disney was just a partner, Toy Story 3’s plot involved Buzz being recalled to Taiwan and the rest of the gang going after him to save him.

Just like how Woody found out more about his in-universe persona he was based on, Buzz would do the same.

And yes, that means they probably would’ve used the fact that all Buzz Lightyears think that they’re THEE Buzz Lightyear when they’re first turned on from the first movie as the plot thread to expand upon in this version of Toy Story 3, making it a proper movie trilogy.

It ALSO would’ve provided a vehicle to officially introduce the toysonas of some of the OTHER Star Command characters -- like Mira Nova and Booster from the spinoff movie and Disney show -- the same way Toy Story 2 introduced Jane and Bullseye

So if ANYTHING, instead of looking at this movie as the quote-unquote REAL in-universe version of Buzz... Y’know, like a WRONG person...

Look at this -- and even Star Command, real talk -- as the in-universe movie people saw and anticipated after only having the toys at their disposal, and an animated series based on said toys for so long, ala Transformers

...Holy shit; Transformers is actually a VERY good example.

Was a toy line before it was a cartoon, was MADE into a cartoon and had various takes on it before it was a live-action movie franchise...

Buzz was supposed to meet a recalled Transformer-like toy in the original script of Toy Story 3 during his recall if Disney couldn’t get a license from Hasbro...

Y-Yeah, that’s a good analogy; let’s just...let’s just stick with that analogy

Readers, I apologize if my explanation of the whole situation sounded like...a disappointed parent who knows their child can do better than a C+ in English class

It is NEVER my intention to come across that way. Because despite me LOVING High School English, that would be hypocritical of me. Especially since to this day, I do not know the difference between nouns, verbs and adverbs

...Yes, I’m a published author of fiction. Why do you ask?

Nevertheless, I hope you forgive any condescending tones or passive aggressiveness I gave off during this explanation and came out of this a bit less flustered than you were before-hand

But, in the case you DIDN’T understand a single word I said, (slams the desk) IF JOHNNY HAS FIVE APPLES~!

So with that being said Readers, your homework assignment for the day!

Write in the comment section below if YOU’RE looking forward to seeing Lightyear

Or, if you feel like sharing with the rest of class, let me know if there’s any OTHER in-universe Toy Story shows or movies you wouldn’t mind watching.

A Disney Plus exclusive Woody’s Roundup would be pretty cool to watch is all I’m saying. Especially now that we have a Monsters Inc sequel series on there.

Whichever question you decide to answer, I’d LOVE to know your thoughts.