Crowned in Black: Chapter 34

The hallway, big enough to admit a full-sized queen dragon on foot, seemed to stretch into oblivion. There were bizarre black fire torches lining the walls, shimmering and barely visible in the darkness. They cast no light, save for the thin rime of white around the outside of the flames. I'd seen that effect before: first in the tombs of Tuun and dragons under Taltos, and then in Lahati's Tomb. Suri tried to light a torch from one of them, but instead of red flames, the torch sprung a halo of new darkfire.

“Huh.” Suri held it near her arm, and frowned as, instead of lighting up the surface of her armor, any ability to see it vanished.

Gar watched her efforts in amusement. "Almost like we're in the hidey hole of the god of darkness or something, huh?”

"Oh, bugger off. It was worth a shot.” Suri made a face and ground the torch out against the wall.

We were holding our collective breath by the time we reached the end of the tunnel. There was a very, very faint murky light down here, which seemed bright compared to the shaft we'd taken to reach the first room of the dungeon. It was cold and dry. Beyond the threshold - shaped like the stylized, toothed maw of a dragon, teeth included - was a round room with a round platform in the center, connected to the door by a short stone walkway formed from the back of the dragon's tongue. Three segmented pillars that looked uncomfortably like millipedes formed a neat triangle around the center of the floor, connecting the floor to the ceiling. There were no enemies - just a small portal arch at the other end of the platform, behind the pillars. There was a plinth in front of it, which looked like it had a slot for the Spear of Nine Spheres.

"If there's a room but no mobs, then it's usually a trap, a puzzle, or both." I frowned, but even with my darkvision active, could see nothing out of place. There were no rails and about fifty feet of nothingness around the perimeter of the floor. Stained stone walls rose up out of the pit, decorated with abstract patterns that wound around three double-ringed, blank circles. "Rin, can you spot any mechanisms?"

"I um... can actually barely see," she whispered back. "But I can try and detect magic?"

"Go ahead." Suri was also having trouble in the gloom, squinting her eyes to try and make out details.

Rin gestured with her spellglove, and murmured a word of power. The portal arch lit up with a soft humming glow, as did the plinth. The entirety of the walls emanated magic: the circles on the walls lit up brighter than the rest, showing a faint tracery of Matir's holy symbol in the center of each one.

"Hmm. Well... my guess is we have to hit those circles with something," I said, stepping out onto the walkway. "Arrows, maybe."

"Bullets?" Gar said hopefully.

"Can't hurt to try." Nothing happened as I put my weight on the stones. Shrugging, I crossed over to the round platform, waiting expectantly for something to spawn or for the circles to light up of their own accord. Nope. "Maybe they're starting us off easy."

The others followed me out. Karalti was next, then Gar, then Rin. Suri, who was the heaviest, had the lowest dex, and least chance of saving herself if the floor collapsed, came last. She looked around dubiously. "Well... seems alright. Not convinced we aren't gonna touch something that makes the floor here give way, mind you."

"Yeahhhh." I couldn't hear any creaking or feel any weird vibrations, so I went over to the plinth to investigate. It looked the same as the one out in the antechamber. "Maybe that room in front of the Gate was like... the outer antechamber. And this is the inniechamber."

"Well, that one's going on the 'nicknames for my vag' list." Suri snorted. "Gar, wanna give one of those circles a ping?"

"Wait! We don't know if they have to be activated in a certain order or something." Rin waved her hands frantically as Gar drew his revolver. "Hector... maybe activate the portal first?"

"Sure." I hefted the Spear and drove it into the slot. It slid in, locked... and then the walkway between the platform and the dragon's mouth crumbled as the jaws snapped shut with an earth-shuddering BOOM.

"Aww jeez, Scoob." I winced, and tried to pull the Spear free. It didn’t budge.

There was a crunch beneath our feet. Rin screamed as the platform dropped, then jolted to a stop as the segmented pillars stretched out and caught the floor. They weren't pillars at all: they were chains, the links packed together in columns until whatever had braced the floor up had fallen away. As we tried to find our balance, the chains caused the stone pancake under our feet to swing and sway.

"Oh you bloody cunt of a-!" Suri stumbled into one of the chains with a grunt, throwing her arms up to guard herself. As she crashed into it, the platform teetered and threatened to tip to that side. Rin's automations had poor grip on stone, and as the platform pitched in that direction, they began to slide down toward their doom - and everyone else's doom, for that matter.

"EVERYONE TO THE MIDDLE!" I roared, breaking the fugue of panic that suddenly gripped the party.

Rin didn't argue. Our second-heaviest member, she ran to the middle of the platform and lay down, clinging to one of the chains with both arms. Gar swayed over to join her, then Karalti and me. The combined weight of us brought the edge back up, letting Suri - cursing in three different languages - claw her way back toward the center. But it was too late for one of the turrets. Hopper skidded off the edge of the platform, chittering and flailing as she plummeted to her doom. Her sudden loss pitched the platform the other way, sending it swinging into the opposite wall with a crunch. We held onto the floor, the chains, and each other for dear life as Lovelace skidded across the floor in the opposite direction and smashed into one of the chains. The impact threw everyone up, then back to the surface of the platform as we swung back.

"Hopper!" Rin cried out in dismay, but didn't let go of the chain. "No! I can’t see her meter!!"

“Shit, Rin. I’m sorry.” But there was nothing we could do except hang on and wait as the trap spun wildly. It took over a minute to slow down and restabilize.

"Fuck... okay." I was short of breath by the time the platform returned to the center. NOW it was creaking: the ancient chains groaned every time anyone moved, causing the platform to wobble and tip. They were set in such a way that the plate beneath us would oscillate at the slightest imbalance. The Spear was still stuck... and the portal wasn’t active. As the dust settled, the three circles on the walls around us flared to life. One was red, one was blue, and one was white. Very patriotic.

"Gar, can you get a shot on one of them? They're all the same... I don't think there's an order." Carefully, I rose to one knee in the middle of the circle, then slowly stood. Karalti did the same.

"Yup. Y'all find a point of balance. Think even the kick from this puppy is gonna make us swing." He rolled to his belly and braced the pistol, sighting down.

"I'm not movin' a fuckin inch." Suri was clinging to one of the chains, the one opposite Rin.

I motioned to Karalti, and we carefully took a few steps toward the other side. The platform was easily unbalanced by the weight of a single person. As soon as we felt it start to tip, she scooted back until she countered the weight of me and the portal.

"Right, hold on to your balls. Or ovaries. Or whatever bits you got." Gar narrowed one eye, then let off a shot. He nailed the sigil dead in the center, but other than a small sputtering surge of mana, nothing else happened.

"Oh no. Do we have to use arrows?" Rin pulled herself up along the chain to kneel. "Hopper has... Hopper had my crossbow mount."

"Wait." I looked around at the circles. "Wait. We've got this all wrong. We don't need to strike them with something. They're palm locks, like the ones that let us in here. We have to put our hands in those circles. Red has to be the Warsinger... uhh... white for Paragon, blue for Artist?"

"Which artist puts their hand there? How does it even know?" Karalti asked.

"Beats the hell out of me," I replied.

"It's forcing us to work together." Suri grunted, and pulled herself to her feet. "We have to get the platform to swing out toward the locks."

I looked over the platform, calculating what we'd need to do to get it to swing - without flipping or tilting. The design of the chains was fucking evil: if we piled to one side without counterbalancing it, one of the chains would slacken and the thing would tip us into the trash can. Forcefully. "Okay... Gar, Rin, tell me if I'm wrong, but I think we have to place our strongest people near two of the chains. They kind of step from side to side to get it rocking. We have the person who needs to slap the symbol up the front, and someone slightly lighter counterweighting them at the back."

Gar's eyes flicked from place to place as I spoke. I still didn't know the guy as well as I wanted to... but if there was one thing about Gar I could be sure of, it was that he was smart as hell. "Nah. Not quite. Wall-slapper stands in front of Chain A. Two people stand next to Chains B and C on either side. You hold it one hand, out to the side like this." He held his arm out, elbow slightly bent, and mimed grasping the pillar-chain. "To get the platform moving, you adjust your body weight, or bob up and down a bit, like you would when you're standing on a swing and trying to get it to move. Gives us more control, keeps the swing linear."

"Rin and I weigh about the same." Suri looked over to the Mercurion, who flushed. "Hector and Gar weigh about the same. Karalti's gotta be about sixty kilos soaking wet."

"Can you convert that to pounds for me?" Rin asked.

"About one forty pounds."

"Ooh." Rin nodded. "So... we should have Karalti up front first, right? While we try to get the hang of it."

"Sounds good to me." I didn't even question Gar's assessment. "Let's try Gar's way, and if it doesn't work, we'll reassess."

"’Course it’ll work, because I’m not a fucking dumbass." Gar eyed the white symbol on the wall. "Lovelace stays in the middle, Karalti, you stay here in the center until we give the word. Move with me, Hector. Chain A's in front of that symbol. You take B and I'll take C. We stand across from each other on the left. Then Rin and Suri take the other side on the right."

"Got it." I decided to ignore the ‘dumbass remark’.

We gazed at each other meaningfully for a moment, then crossed the shivering platform at the same time. I grasped the side of my chain as Gar reached his. The ground vibrated as we moved, but it remained flat and steady.

"Now you two." Gar beckoned Rin forward.

The pair of women did the same thing, and as Suri joined me on the other side of the chain, the platform dipped slightly toward her. Both women were about a hundred pounds heavier than Gar and I, inclusive of armor and weapons.

"Okay... Karalti, take your position." Gar nodded to her. "Suri, Rin, you ladies are about to get this thing moving. Wait 'til Karalti's almost at the edge, then you shift your weight back and do a little side lunge back toward your partner, awright?"

"Got it!" Rin pumped a fist, then eeped as even that small motion made the sensitive plate shudder.

Karalti strutted over to the remaining chain, curling a leg around it and grasping it with one hand, the other outstretched toward the wall. "Okay! Go for it!"

Suri looked over to Rin and nodded, and the pair of them began to rock their weight: at first, Rin went the opposite direction, and an unpleasant situation passed through the floor… but she corrected before the platform started twisting, and the chains groaned as we began to swing a little back and forth. Gar signaled me, and we joined in. As we shimmied in time with Suri and Rin, the arc of the swing grew.

“Oompa, Loompa, doobiti-do! I’ve got a murder puzzle for you!” I sang in time as we bobbed up and down.

Suri glared daggers at me. “Hector, shut the fuck up.”

"Whee!" Karalti laughed as she flailed for the wall. Every swing brought her closer. "Keep going! Almost there!"

"This feels like fucking Dance Dance Revolution," I laughed as well, high-stepping side to side in time with Suri.

"The hell is that?" Suri wrinkled her nose in concentration, keeping half an eye on my feet.

"It's a game from my grandparents’ day. Or should I say, a lifestyle.”

"Don't go too hard, or we're gonna slam the damn wall!" Gar snapped at the rest of us.

Karalti's face screwed into an expression of intense concentration as she waved her arm out. She was within a foot of the glowing white circle, then half a foot, then inches... she scraped her nails at the stone and hissed, but then chirped happily as the next swing brought her in just close enough to briefly slap her hand in the middle of the sigil. The symbol and circle ignited in a ring of fire that didn't fade, and my dragon trilled aloud in victory.

"How do we stop it the disk!? Floor! Disco-floor!?" Rin was vibrating with tension as she tried to keep her balance.

Gar thought about it for a second. "Whatever you do, don't haul on that chain. We do a little dosey-do. Rin, turn around and take my place. Suri, you do the same with Hector. You just hold position, Karalti... come back to the center when it slows down."

The platform was whooshing like a massive pendulum. I glanced at Suri, then gave Gar a go-ahead sign. Like line dancers changing partners, Suri and I waited until we felt gravity push us on the downswing, then moved around the chain, one forward, one back, to reverse our positions. Gar and Rin did the same.

"Rin, Suri! Crouch down!" Gar barked. "Hector, me and you lean a bit toward against the momentum!"

They did, and we did. The effect was almost immediate. The swing began to slow as we gradually reversed the momentum, using our weight and teamwork to apply brakes to the rapid back and forth motion. As the minutes passed, the swing slowed to a point where we could have walked on it, a twitching slow circle under our feet.

"Great work, Gar. You’re a born conductor." I drew a deep breath. "Artist circle, next. Karalti, you can take Gar's place. She's lighter than he is, so we'll have to adjust how hard we go."

"No you won't." Gar looked to Rin. "Let's see... I'm a hundred and sixty, Karalti's about twenty-thirty pounds lighter... what's Lovelace weigh?"

"Three twenty-seven," Rin whispered. She looked like she was about to cry. "S-So did... so did Hopper."

"It's okay, Rin. You'll rebuild her." Gar awkwardly patted her on the back. "Awright, when I pass Karalti on the platform, move Lovelace toward you and slightly back, about four feet off center. Her weight'll offset the imbalance while I'm at the front."

"Ohhh." I glanced at the crouching robot. "Fuck, I'm so glad we brought engineers."

"Me too. Otherwise you pack of idiots would all fall to your doom, and I’d have to go nag Istvan for my ship back." Gar flushed across the cheeks, and turned his face away so I couldn't see his flustered expression. "Anyway, time to rotate positions."

With Lovelace's help, we managed to swing Gar up to touch the blue circle, lighting it up. Then it was Suri's turn. Because of her size, her armor, and the weight of her inventory, she was easily the single heaviest person in the group. Even with the best positioning we could manage, the platform jittered and threatened to flip the closer Suri got to the wall. She had to hand off her inventory to the rest of us, and go up to the edge of the platform in her underwear to be able to slap the wall.

When all three circles were lit, there was a grinding sound from the ceiling overhead and from somewhere deep in the pit. We held onto our chains, heads turning as we searched for the source of the sound... which only became obvious once the platform slowed enough to be caught by some kind of mechanism underneath that stabilized it. Machinery ground under our feet and cut out with another resonant BOOM, leaving the ground as steady as when we'd first entered. A few seconds later, the portal on the other side came to life.

"We did it!" Rin threw both arms in the air and bounced a little, standing on one foot and lifting the other behind her. "Onward, to whatever fresh hell awaits!"

As a group we turned to look at her.

"What?" She puffed her cheeks out at us. “I can swear sometimes, too!”