[Removed for Amazon] Quest Academy: Book 4 (Chapters 75, 76, 77, 78, 79 and 80)
Added 2024-11-18 20:17:21 +0000 UTCHey Everyone,
Hope you all had a lovely weekend! Here are the next 6 chapters for Quest Academy. I really hope you like them. Let me know in the comments, and over in the spoiler chat on Discord what you think of them. Really appreciate all the discussions and insights.
Sleeping is going a lot better lately, so we've more chapters this week. I've a long-list of things that need to be edited throughout the story, so thank you for everyone highlighting things that aren't clear or look like mistakes.
I know a lot of people felt that the argument between Sal and his parents didn't really feel authentic. Sal is the type of person to overthink everything, and it takes him a little longer to process his feelings. Hopefully these chapters will hit the mark and you'll see what I'm talking about.
Until next week!
Brian
Comments
Seriously his parents are fucking awesome.
Fortunis
2025-01-29 22:13:54 +0000 UTCHey, so I’m catching up to you all, currently reading chapter 80. I started reading the series last week and binged the first 3 books within a week. I gotta say that I'm a little disappointed. Book 4 is very different to the other 3 and at the pace the story is going if Sal were to graduate from QA + whatever you want to show us afterwards, at least 2 semesters per year, all of that is easily 30 books. Don't get me wrong, if it's really good I won't mind. I just read 3 books in a single week but if it's closer in quality to this 4th then I might not be along for the whole journey. Now, I'm not here to just complain but actually give my opinion since you still have to edit book 4 before the official release. I just think that Sal is very unrelatable. He's always been emotional and illogical at times but now it's too much. You made his own father say something that’s been bugging me throughout this whole book, Sal doesn’t have to apologize for how he feels and that is very true. You simply do not allow Sal to ever have any conflict. He’d forgive anybody of anything. He has no spine whatsoever. The most frustrating doormat I’ve ever seen in a book. He is weak in every aspect of his life despite having the potential to become the strongest of all. Hell, he’s already amongst the top 10% of people for sure. Another problem in the book is his relationship with Fab. Any real person would tell you that trauma dumping, especially before even a first date, is a red flag but of course in his fairy tale it only makes Fab love Sal even more. It just gets tiring how everything he does is always perfect. I don’t mind if it’s that way with his power, especially while using Perfect but he’s perfect in every other way too. A true Mary Sue. The first 3 books had so much more conflict, intrigue and bigger stakes. Now it’s just what is Sal going to fail upwards into trying to accomplish something wild but turning it even more incredible and what non-issue will pop up just to be immediately resolved with hugs and kisses? He’s not even 20 but he apparently has to be the most mature person in every situation, pretending he’s wrong even when he’s not just to avoid conflict. God forbid any “fight” lingers for longer than a single chapter. Only reason why this seems like such a negative review is because of how highly I think of the initial 3 books. The break shouldn’t have been a whole book. Hell, I hope no other semester lasts 3 books either unless A LOT of actually entertaining stuff happens. Book 4 is the only where I found myself skimming through chapters where it was all just info dump about how he’s using the Arkwright once again or another emotional monologue where he apologizes for breathing. Still looking forward to book 5.
Envoy
2025-01-17 21:58:56 +0000 UTCHey Brett, I've already had a chat with Jacob about his feedback and everything, so there's no need to be blunt. He's using voice to text, and he's passionate about the story so they can run a bit long. :)
James Northman
2024-11-29 06:22:54 +0000 UTCDude, just shut up. If you want to type this much, just become an author yourself. Stop wasting everyone's time.
brett wolfe
2024-11-29 00:04:22 +0000 UTCsubmission date is this week isn’t it? Does that mean the finale of the book is in this weeks chapters?
Nate
2024-11-25 19:46:30 +0000 UTCGuess what day it is? Monday. You guessed correctly. Will you get a prize? I don't know. Brian, will they get a prize for guessing its Monday? Maybe something that ends with "apters"?
C
2024-11-25 19:41:31 +0000 UTCAnd you're forgetting or ignoring the line he says on the ride back to campus. The bloodlust flooding through him from killing so many demons overtook him. Just like how Sal's armor can be broken through with enough force. That necklace can likely only hold back Gallants emotions to a certain extent until they start flooding out of him. It clearly doesn't negate all emotion gallant feels. If it did then he wouldn't have argued with Erika. Either he would have ran back downstairs to fight more monsters or listened to her orders. Whichever outcome he thinks would get his team the most points and get him closer to getting the Perfect weave. Arguing with her and insulting Sal doesn't help either of those goals. And if you truly think Gallants true personality is being arrogant and manipulative. Then you must believe the necklace doesn't perfectly block his emotions. Because there was no logical reason for him to say that. Only an emotional one.
Darnell Maxwell
2024-11-25 18:25:05 +0000 UTCHowever Gallant's power was suppressed at the time of running the tower. He even makes a comment to the fact that his necklace is still on preventing the power from doing anything. His entire façade of a personality finally fell away and we got to see the unfiltered thoughts. He has the solution, he doesn't need Sal anymore. We know from Prestige that there's more to Sal and Gallant's interactions, but I don't think they're going to be working together.
Kerradeph
2024-11-25 18:03:18 +0000 UTCThe story is definitely moving forward, just in a personal way for sal. Character growth is definitely movement in the story
Jonathan Robichaux
2024-11-24 01:52:06 +0000 UTCYeah I know long-winded sorry
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-23 21:49:46 +0000 UTCHoly shit.
Rainer
2024-11-23 21:48:13 +0000 UTCI know I talk a lot but I'm hopefully then all of my comments are useless. I thought I wanted to add a few generalist story notes that I thought might help if they were addressed. Mostly these are things that could be fixed with a paragraph or two or post some kind of conflict with previous ideas that we've been introduced to. Also I'm probably going to throw in one or two ideas of my own that could be cool to conceptualize around. I promise these comments are not going to be nearly as heavy some of my previous ones. I actually wanted to start off with the gala. I personally don't get why he's not using his skill Master ability At the Gala. I know that you mentioned he was nervous because Prestige was able to tell that he was using it during the Excursion but that seems not right to me. Prestige has an ability that specifically works with different Essence types and the breathing technique obviously opens up a little bit to the other things but I think the main reason why she recognized that he was using skill Essence wasn't because of the breathing technique but her ability in general. That was my thought at the time anyways obviously you didn't write it away so it's not right but it's a point of confusion to me. Plus if he did have the tracker which wasn't mentioned until he actually needed it I don't see why he wasn't using it. I mean as nobody really knows what he's tracking it seems like more of the soon to be revealed youngest generation of Heroes might have gone with wearing a Tracker at that Gala. In fact it almost makes sense that the gala would hand them out to the students so that they could identify who they were talking. I mean with 80,000 Heroes it's obviously going to be impossible for all of these people to be known to the students. It's also been mentioned that the hunters Bureau is very big on giving out large-scale gifts so it wouldn't be so out of character for them to invest and giving new Heroes that might want one a Tracker that they could slowly use in more and more capacities as they grow. I just think it's kind of a waste given that he can use these abilities in his crafting he's not taking the opportunity to identify the different abilities and skills that people have. Specifically because these would all be things that are already on record with the Hunter's Bureau with the only exception being the actual weaves that people use. Plus there were several of the heroes there that were using their powers and abilities so it's obviously not a faux pot to go that route. And then I get him being nervous in a room full of people that are super powerful but he's also super nervous about getting kidnapped and one of the first indicators that someone's going to take it and happy as if they're using their powers around you so the tracker kind of seems like a necessity. Plus you could be another point of contention when it comes to Trickster. Is eyes and his bills are able to track Essence signatures and you could throw in that all of those Illusions had their own ability leaves which would throw in a hell of a lot more confusion or you could have it be that he's trying to figure out why they didn't have ability weaves in which case it would throw in a hellacious amount of confusion. I think it would be a fun little trip point in the story there. Next, I wanted to point out that you never said specifically that he didn't bring his weapon to the gala so I naturally soon that he did. Primarily I assume that because the visor was connected to the revolver and up until now we've only been told that they couldn't work if they were too far apart so I kind of naturally assume that. It was always a sticking point with me in the last book when he went on the scavenger run that you never mentioned he had the revolver with him and I kind of just assumed he had it in some kind of Sling bag. I assumed he had to have some kind of bag with him otherwise he would have had to leave all of the notes to the Scavengers gave him lying around until he got back on the train or got back to a point where he could pick him up off the ground or whatever. When you bring it up later you say that the tracker has become untethered from the revolver but you've never actually shown that in the story so it's a bit confusing. The natural idea would be that he didn't have the revolver with him at the gala and that the storm of essence forced one to evolve all the other one was too far away to do the evolution. But that also calls into question why he even had his tracker with him if he was carrying it on an invisible holster. To my mind and logic, it seems like he should have had that revolver with him. He's been very paranoid about possibly being kidnapped because of his new ability and realizing the value of his original ability. The gala ends up being in a very recently reclaimed Zone which seems like something that might have been pointed out before the gala started. He's a natural assumption is that with so many Heroes there he would be safe but still there's always a chance of something like a monster horde for me or something like that. Plus he has an invisible holster that makes it impossible for anybody to actually spot the he has a weapon with him so why isn't he wearing it when he's got all these other factors laying down on him. I kind of assumed it was like the section with the scavenger run and you just hadn't mentioned it the tracker and the gun were together until you sacrifice the gun because you said that they had become untethered. I was really hoping for a grand reveal of some badass revolver when he first under the invisibility on his holster. I get why the holster would be breaking because of the low quality of materials but they're pistol and advisor should have made it through just fine. Plus the pistol being inside the holster would have protected him from any damage it might have caused his person during the storm. So I think there needs to be something touching on why the revolver wasn't there because it just seems logical that he would have had it. And if he did end up having it it would totally rewrite the section about sacrificing their revolver which broke my heart so I kind of hope you rewrite that but obviously I'm not the Storyteller. Haha! Also I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one that was dying to see the specs on the new upgrade to his visor. I kind of assumed you were going to do that during your final Edition and just didn't want to throw it in just yet but that's going to be something that's going to drive people nuts if you don't go back and put it in. He's been so thorough so far to analyze everything of his except for the holster that not knowing the specs is a little nutty. As far as the whole revolver thing goes, I Honestly kind of hoping for him to end up with a badass sci-fi/ Western Gunslinger kind of outfit in the end. He's become so efficient with the revolver it just seems kind of a waste specially because at the end of the last book it almost seemed like he was enjoying using the Quick Draw aspect of the revolver. I mean that with the Arbiters judgment jacket and if he had reworked his holster to be more of a cross draw and his visor. All of that would come together to look badass. Plus it even kind of fits with the aesthetic that Sal seems to go with. In movies and stuff like that we see gunslingers fancier clothing broadcast suits and such then we do nowadays. It's totally believable that a gunslinger would be wearing a double-breasted suit and vest into battle. Even if you didn't keep the Arbiters judgment I think he would have to rework something with those grappling hooks because one of his biggest flaws I think all of the students are going to have is moving through a Battlefield at speed. Which brings me to my next point. One of the greatest uses he's going to get out of the Arkwright he's going to be its ability to synthesize new materials and from what it looked like it was actually creating new materials using the Dungeon heart. You mentioned the switcher sinew you as a material wait she knew he didn't have access to which implies that the dungeon heart is actually capable of producing materials directly without having to Source them. I mean that functional loan even if you don't have it creating its own materials is going to be worth its weight in gold. He could buy raw materials off the credit floor send them home have them rework them in the machine and then send them back and you could just put them back on the credit floor at a super high price. Plus it's going to give him materials that are capable of handling his abilities. But really what caught my attention is that if he can make it to make new Alloys why not throw a little bit of storms dealing with other things and see if you can get something that's better at handling Essence tethering at a lighter weight. I mean obviously we could go full ninja out and have it be combined with some kind of spider silk to create a thread instead of an actual chain but that it has a similar tensile strength to prevent it from being broken. If you were able to create a material like that it could easily be one of the best features you could add to his new armor sets by throwing and grappling hooks that aren't necessarily weapons but just used to get around the battlefield which was so well highlighted in the previous book. I think one of the first things that he should do once he actually gets into looking at those materials that he can synthesize is trying to find things that could do just that replace bigger bulkier with sleek and smooth. I actually thought that stormweave material that you mentioned might have some high evidence absorption rate going for it because of the similar names. But I hope I've explained myself well enough that you get what I'm saying. He wouldn't need to take the Arbiters judgment away from his friend who has put it to Great use and instead could create something of his own that has a similar function while still retaining his attack capabilities with his revolver. Which would so match that super sci-fi Western thing that I was mentioning earlier. But that's beside the point. Where this coming in the story isn't so much just in the future but I think that's going to be one of the first things that any of the other Crafters who have actually gotten to use the machine which right now it's just Fabi but later on could be others are going to Rave about. The ability to turn low in materials into high end materials would be a godsend for any Crafter. Plus he could actually replicate this ability back it the academy by creating a much smaller less independent machine that is strictly down to automated refinement. He's already got the intelligence at one location and the OS necessary to run it you could just import all of those options to the new machine as it seems the system ability doesn't really require relay towers and stuff to work and that's what they run on primarily. Finally I have a kind of suggestion if you think about giving Sal another revolver or other weapon which I personally think would be better off for the story because it's not copying Fabi's Style, which kind of seem like a lazy decision (not from a writing standpoint but from a standpoint of the character) when he was starting to think of going with one of her make suits instead of something of his own, I think the best way to put that Dominion ability to use isn't so much in large area of effects because they take so much essence but in smaller effects that have bigger consequences I guess. For example if he remade his pistol which I kind of didn't want it to be destroyed in the first place but if he did remake it putting the Dominion ability on the cylinder and instead fabricating the bullets Essence signature using the ability would be a much better and more efficient Essence use I think then creating whole new weapons. Plus if he sticks with a gun and goes with that silvermoon strategist set that you've already created, I would think the most premium option would be to put the transformation ability on the gun giving it the capability of turning into the revolver, a rifle which you mentioned earlier but never revealed, and a sniper rifle as a trifecta is a beautiful idea. Now that he's getting into Essence programming it probably wouldn't be too big of a deal to create an Essence program that could automatically switch between the three weapons and still use the Dominion ability for the bullets. Plus having it synchronized to his tracker and giving the tracker and ability to imprint Essence signatures on the bullets in conjunction with the Dominion ability would be awesome. I mean some of the new materials that he's creating in the machine are probably going to be useful for making new rounds with better or more varied effects. This way he can make around use the visor to registers Essence signature to the pistol, sorry revolver for some reason I'm stuck in my Wild West mindset and like the word pistol and I keep having to erase it, which would give him the newer effects without having to switch out rounds because he was complaining about that being a hassle. In fact if you did take my suggestion and keep the pistol and evolve it at the same time as the eyepiece it would be cool to have the Dominion ability and printed onto the pistol anyways because it's something that he created and he can obviously put it on things so why not with all the random Essence in the air being funneled into the pistol having it take on that ability. No obviously that wouldn't give it the same variety as creating a brand new weapon and using the transformation ability on it to keep the strategist set but it is a quick option if you find it appealing. Plus there was an earlier comment that he's starting to overreach and all of his training. I don't necessarily agree with that standpoint because I think the road to specialization that you've created is through going through a wide variety of things and then focusing those things toward what you wanted to do, but this could help with that issue. It never really matters that he's one of the people who stands at the back to fire it enemies. Even if he is he's still doing his job as a support as well as a support can be by being an all-rounder. Yes it's important for him to learn the physical martial arts but that doesn't mean he's a coward for standing at the back and shooting a shit. There's a reason why guns are so widely used nowadays. It takes a lot less time to train people in their use and it's kind of silly to get up personal with something that can kill you just because you've got to prove you've got a set between your legs. Personally I like the fact that as the support he is capable of bringing offense as well as defense with the barrier gauntlets and possibly even healing if he is able to use the Arbiters judgment in a similar fashion to his party healer in the last book. I mean that is the function of a support is to help others better perform in their duties. He's already got the tracker helping him help the controller. With the handgun he's capable of providing some secondary offense at range which is great when it's combined with the close range stuff. He also brings AOE and I know that's a gamer term and not necessarily what you want to apply to this book but it's easy enough to understand. However this does bring up another one of those little sticking points that I wanted to bring up and that is I think one of the first things that he would start doing once that Excursion was over is going through a field manual guide and figuring out a go kit in case he was ever put in that position again. And I get why he didn't at the time he was super busy he knew it was coming up but now he doesn't know whether he's going to be thrown into a portal or Not by the end of the year. I just think at this point that one of the first things he should do once he finds out about that portal run is start putting together a list for a go bag. Tents water refinement capabilities, both of which you should have plans for from the outing, Fire Starting equipment and anything else you can think of. The new machine could simplify a lot of this because all we would have to do is put in the instructions to make a tent I will make a water source or a heat source that you should already have plans for. Another good thing for him to think of now that it's been mentioned to him is a medkit cuz you never know if your healer is going to run out of essence. And he really doesn't have any excuse for having all of this on him at pretty much anytime because he could create a dimensional bag using his new fancy machine that has the ability to make new fancy materials. Why wouldn't it be able to infuse void her heart into dread cloth and create a self hiding tent that is three times bigger on the inside? I guess the whole point of this little part of my ramble is I think some of his crafty needs to be diverted from Strictly weapons and armor to more utilitarian things that could come in handy it anytime. Really one of the first things I thought of the minute you mentioned the water source that was brought up during the Excursion was I'd be Mass producing that sucker the minute I got back to the academy. Cuz everybody who went on that Excursion is going to want one. And if he's all about makin' money then that's a brilliant idea. Use the recent traumas of all the students against them and create a Empire of money. Plus if you weren't so fixated on the automation thing providing everybody with a simple box that has the growth ability on it to allow them to throw a small slice of like a carrot inside of it and grow more food out in the field to extend your rations, is just smart. Well automation is cool for mass production, it's the little things that make life worth living. And after weeks of going hungry that would be one of the first things on my mind. Like I said these are just things to think about and I hope they help Inspire just something about the story. And once again I apologize for being kind of long-winded but I thought some of these were points that needed to be brought up in order to clear up possible confusion in the story and might be fun little tidbits to cogitate over.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-22 22:23:07 +0000 UTCI think some things are going to have to come to a head during that final auction. I don't know if you taking any writing classes but there's a very generalist principle that a story should always end where it begins or close to it. So the natural ending of this book would be some kind of conflict in the auction itself. Plus if he went back and reorganized the chapters a little bit to include some of that reveal beforehand it's likely that he could keep the action close to where you wanting it without changing the overall story.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-22 21:36:51 +0000 UTCBut I think that's what this book is mostly been about. Him catching up to the others. Almost all of the other people in his cohort had some kind of combat training. Now he's getting it. He didn't know Squad about the world outside of his little bubble. He's learning. I think this book is all about him catching up in the most General sense to his fellow students. Now he's going to be going into the next semester capable enough to take any kind of class that he wants. He's going to have real life experience instead of simple in-house combat classes that are essentially Dojo time. He's blowing past all the others with his Gates. I mean they're still going to be lots for him to learn but seems like skills are the one thing that everybody's going to have to continue learning no matter what. In reality that whole first three books with all about getting the students caught up in combat classes and stuff like that. Now he's not only going to be caught up he's going to be more advanced because he's got an actual fighting style designed to fight against demons where is what was being taught in the academy was focused on facing off against people. And thanks to the perfect ability most of it is being sped up.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-22 21:34:11 +0000 UTCI feel like this book is having Sal grow as a person as well as setting up several story lines for future books antagonists. he now has Bastion, The Silverson Group, Demons, and a portal run to deal with. It may be be as action pact or fast paced like the others but its laying very strong foundations.
Nate
2024-11-22 21:27:57 +0000 UTCI really hate to say this because it makes me sound like the worst kind of troll, but the last three weeks of the chapters have felt like literary sit and spin. There’s a lot of action, but it isn’t moving the story forward. Since the Silverson reveal and completion of the Arkwright- the story keeps circling: between Sal and his parents and Sal and Fabi with only a few new elements. Honestly, it feels like the the story is in a holding pattern until it can pick up again in earnest with book 5. Maybe having Divinity come visit with a conflict could spice things up with a lead-in to book 5, especially if a New Romantic undercurrent is present- just a suggestion (don’t want to just dump without offering any potential solutions). Just so you know- this series is my favorite of all that I’ve read/listened to since starting with Kindle/Audible in 2018. I’ll continue to eagerly anticipate the weekly chapters…
Dr. Chaos
2024-11-22 19:54:07 +0000 UTCI get what you're saying about barry. For the most part I was just kind of a conspiracy theory kind of thing and not really serious. But it could show up in the story for all we know and I just wanted to put it out there. As for the Divinity thing that's one of the things I've been saying with my other comments. Is that we need to know some kind of excuse as to why they're not getting together socially or texting each other. Without knowing why there's no contact it makes the no contact that there is feel like it's done out of your will. Especially about the comment it was made when she was drunk about how she was meddling in his life. Up and down now he's never seen her as meddling in his life. She's trying to give him information to help him make better decisions. But she even used the word meddling means that there's something in him that sees what she's doing as malicious. That's one of the reasons why I made the suggestion that he could have her beauty doing something with the Doom counsel that you will keep her away from texting or communicating anyway. Without the context of what she's doing the interaction so far make it sound like he's actually doing what he's doing to hurt her. Which is not in his character from everything that we have seen. Thanks for making the comment and give me a chance to clarify what I was doing.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-21 13:31:03 +0000 UTCGreat chapters, looking forward to seeing his new uniform, battlesuit for him & Fabi, and training with his parents. Also seeing if Sal is going to leave the legendary visor with the arkwright, so that it can finish its configuration and perhaps build glasses instead of a visor. Discovering which friends and/or founding members of his guild meetup to see the arkwright and possibly go on a dungeon run for team building (ex. Gallant) & resources, before the start of the semester. The only questionable part for me was when he was talking to his mother about not knowing anything about demons and the war. All I was thinking was, didn't he get any information about demons and the war from the news, internet, and/or his previous schooling since the war has been going on for about 60 years.
keoki
2024-11-21 11:21:04 +0000 UTCBarry said his father was a Vanguard and his mother a healer, so they may have supplied some training even if he had to learn the illusions part on his own. We also don’t know where everyone lives so Divinity may not have been close enough to do a dungeon run. I don’t feel Sal’s character would just cut her out. I also like the possibility of Arkwright, but it seems a lot of materials are going in and not a lot is coming out.
Dawn Zeleznik
2024-11-21 10:27:48 +0000 UTCYeah the mental protection isnwsy over due, she really messed him up and he is just ignoring it completely. The guy is on par to automate dungeon clearing with that drone attachment for arkwright. Doc might use trains, but drone carriers could easily be Sal's end game.
Charles Gillentine
2024-11-20 13:58:05 +0000 UTCI mean, it would be cool if he could learn all, but at his current rate, 4 books in and he hasn't been allowed the time to even do the basics other students have. It's gonna catch up to him at some point.
Charles Gillentine
2024-11-20 13:47:03 +0000 UTCI get what you're saying from a gamer perspective. But from the way he's got it set up with the master classes it seems like the road to specialization is not through choosing one standardized thing and sticking to it. It seems like your specialization comes down to a combination of all the things that you learned being focused into one area. It's not necessarily in all rounder approach just a new way to find the best specialization. He doesn't have to follow a set path. Although I do have to say I love an all-rounder. In a video game it makes sense to have a specialization and stick with it but I've always liked the full MacGyver approach. In fact I'd be something really cool to do to sell at some point. Have upgrade or somebody throw like three random objects out of and tell him to make something useful. Would be a cool addition to it especially because he's always tending to surprise her so he'd have to end up with something crazy useful in the end.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-20 11:02:06 +0000 UTCI am officially caught up. I love these chapters much more in line with Sal's character then earlier I think. Definitely in line with what you want to name the book. I like how you did mitigate some of my comments about the machine being too op I guess. Still think it's too intelligent as far as the origination of its own crafting blueprints. Do you like that it can synthesize different materials cuz that's not something that he really does in his own crafting. Love that it's doing research on those crafted materials to see what kind of attributes that can possibly come from them. All of that is much more in line with the things that I associate with a machine that you rely on instead of one that takes over for what you're doing. I like that Sal realized that he was lying too much on the machine. Love the newly building dynamic between him and his parents. Since we didn't see a lot of them before this book it was nice having those early chapters so you could see how they would normally interact and the contrast that it brings. Felt like a little slow starter for what you want to name it but at the same time I get what you did it. Well I am very much a fan of him getting together with divinity I get while you're adding some variety and this new possible love interest in Fabi. But it still feels like you're trying to cut her out quite a bit in this book. I mean before this book his first option to go to a dungeon would probably have been to ask divinity not because she can see the future but because he likes hanging out with her and he knows she's a good controller. I can see why you would put her on the back burner as far as going with Fabi because she is more experienced. But when he text Barry and doesn't even think about divinity it still doesn't feel like something that's all would do. I get why there's distance in this book I would prefer some reason for it rather than just a simple I'm not reaching out thing. I just seems like after their last conversation in the previous book that he's purposefully torturing her at this point because that's something she would beat herself up about. Although, I am curious what you're going to do as far as the Silverstone group. There's a lot of possibilities in here for him to find other ties in his school that relate to the group. I mean both Barry and Divinity had quite a bit of training before they went into the academy and while you've explained why Divinity had that training nobody has explained why Barry had that training. Yes he needed it to master his powers but it's not like everybody needs to use their power so I've always wondered who trained him. He was obviously much more advanced than the rest of the students around him and so it kind of got me wondering if maybe he had some connection to this group or a similar group. I like the addition of the militia. It shows that there are more factions than just the primary three that have been named before. It did give me curious about the mount thing that the Luke mentioned. Well it doesn't necessarily sound like something that Sal might want in the future because he's not really focused on Frontline combat, it did get me interested in him maybe having some other kind of companion. Or better yet since he's making a drone maybe he can stumble across another dungeon core and have a robotic companion that he designs. He wanted to do a robot in the first book instead of the Drone to put his own spin on it so that could be something fun for the future. Really do love the new chapters.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-20 10:58:06 +0000 UTCYeah, it makes them very human instead of flat background characters. I love that they are working to fix things and evolve.
Charles Gillentine
2024-11-20 00:44:45 +0000 UTCSal is learning a LOT of different things. He is going to have to pick a route to specialize in soon. Every gamer knows spreading your knowledge too thin will eventually leave you lacking in all areas.
Charles Gillentine
2024-11-20 00:42:57 +0000 UTCThanks for clearing that up a bit. I'm not trying to tear down your work you're a great author and even if you leave this all on the phone it's still a great novel. It just feels like the foundation you set with the first three is being discarded for the new one. I understand the frustrations with big stories I haven't published anything more than shorts myself. I just know that when you go so outside of the existing Foundation you're going to have some problems with how it fits with the rest of the series. Not tearing this down it is a wonderful story I just wanted to point out things and I tend to over explain. Thanks again for responding and clear things up and again my comments were made just to try and short the foundation of the story that you have here not to tear it down. I'm not kidding about being a fan I've literally read all the other ones at least half a dozen times and it's only that low because the newest one just came out. They're wonderful stories.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-19 22:53:03 +0000 UTCThoughts on the book so far: overall i like the content/writing style, especially the chapter lot from this week (was a bit bored with the ones from last week to be honest). In total i feel the book needs a stronger "finale type of action", which might still come? In general i feel like the book needs to be double the length though at this point in order to get there... My biggest frustration is with the Arkwright itself: Sal has no idea anymore how it works/why it works/how it will react, the start was good but then he did not troubleshoot with the people at the gala, he gave complete command to them and they did with the machine whatever they wanted to make it work. I think Sal should show a lot more concern about his "not-understanding" of the arkwright. A good fix might be to have him choose classes for next year already in pre-registration to fix his missing knowledge. And a bit of shouting from Upgrade about this point would help as well. But i do think you are staying true to the story and are not showing signs of tiredness with the story, i guess you simply know more where the story will take us and it will hopefully not have a simple conclusion of "and then he went back to campus" ending in about 5 chapters^^
Nina Speicher
2024-11-19 18:45:52 +0000 UTCAs a strongly vocal critic of the initial reveal from the Argento parents, I like where you're bringing their dynamic. They still seemed extremely flawed and directly negligent to me, letting Sal grow up with literally no greater world understanding or basic education in the things that matter. BUT, they at least admit that and Sal calls them out on their incessant playfulness as defense of their own flaws. It's hard to read and sours the byplay for me but it's also totally believable. Plus it makes sense that it's the root of Sal's struggle to call his friends and allies to task for their flaws, he values connections to his loved ones more than "getting even" for slights. I enjoy the way he's developing there.
BaguaBrady
2024-11-19 18:44:37 +0000 UTCHey Jacob, thanks for all the input. I'm sorry that the story feels like a betrayal to the first three books. There is a lot of valuable feedback in your posts, and I'll be thinking over it for a while. I'm not trying to rush to the end, and I certainly haven't lost interest in the story. It upset me to read that, and I'm sorry that's been your takeaway from the chapters so far. On the points about essence signatures, he combined the research of certain sets, which is why the results were limited to those. Argento, Strategist and Macclemark. He never looked at the blueprints for Pulse and Barrier gauntlets, so they're not recorded in his visor. The machine has never made anything over the Epic Grade. The Ultimate Argento Set was only Legendary through the Overcharge ability, and was woefully inefficient. The Arkwright created a failure in Sal's eyes by overcomplicating things and making assumptions. Sal could be a better communicator, but he'll be seeing his friends again before the end of the book. I'll take your points around setting expectations of why they're not constantly around him, but the world doesn't revolve around Sal and they're spending time with their own families after a very demanding first semester. I do genuinely appreciate your thoughts on the story, and I'll have a proper think about the topics you brought up. I can't please everyone, and when a reader is so invested in certain parts, it feels like a betrayal when those aspects aren't fully explored. There are people that will hate this book because Alex's elixir machine hasn't been made, or Anthony's tracker. The Salvinity stans are going to be upset that we're in a Fabatore scenario. There's no winning solution when there's so many characters and events unfolding, all I can do is my best and hope that it's an entertaining experience for those that stick around to the end.
James Northman
2024-11-19 17:29:00 +0000 UTCI think this story is going in an awesome direction. Sal has all these pressures but he is still staying true to himself. Petro is awesome. Hope the Barry, Blathnaid, and the others show up soon!!
Heather Herren
2024-11-19 14:42:19 +0000 UTCI want it out a bit of an addendum to my previous comment. There doesn't really need to be anything changed about the story other than some small things like giving you excuses why Divinity and Barry and upgrade can't actually communicate with him. Have Divinity working with a doom counsel in a super secret facility for some reason or Barry being forced by his military father to do training or taking a Master Class that was a pop-up during the break. Send upgrade off with Doc Ameye because he's finally connected with her in some way. I'm not saying this has to be completely Rewritten to make it work I just think that there should be something in there that gives reasons for this long bout of Silence. Some reassurance from Sal to Divinity that their last conversation in the commissary isn't going to drive a wedge between them. Really really small things could be added to the story to give valid reasons for the giant Gap that there is here. But it also has to be followed up with emotional weight moments where Sal is beating himself up for not being able to talk to his friends moments where he desperately Wishes the contact them. It seems like all the you know little things that he's done in the past that have shown that he's a pretty caring and understanding guy is being thrown aside because new relationships are needing to be formed. It just feels that there's a giant Gap there and there's no reason for the gap being given to us. Give us a reason why. However the stuff with the machine really does need to be tweaked over because it's just removed his abilities from me to be there. Now that all that really makes him special is his skill Master ability. Realistically with the way the machine is working it will eventually be able to make Mythic grade stuff and because he hasn't learned any of the actual techniques for making things it'll probably do it better than he does.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-19 14:03:11 +0000 UTCI can’t wait to see what his suit will be. It’s nice to see his confidence grow.
Lisa Johnson
2024-11-19 13:49:27 +0000 UTCPlus and I just thought of this why aren't there more Essence signatures in this piece of equipment? From what I have seen there hasn't been any limitations placed on this particular piece of equipment because it's got the domain ability as long as you recognize the signature of a piece of equipment he should be able to fabricate it out of essence but he didn't fabricate the Fabi's armor set and it's already got it the essence signature of it? But it doesn't have things like the sword or the pulse gauntlets or the armor set you made at the beginning of the book? I mean this is easily explained away as being a limitation of the suit itself but really with the domain ability it should be able to store hundreds or thousands of different pieces of equipment that you could just pull out of nowhere as long as he has actually built it and made it and can recognize the signature of it. It's already pulled from stuff that he himself made but was not actually imparted into the materials and stuff that came from plans, so why not the things that he's actually already made and realistically those estimate signatures should have been stored in his visor at some point. If this makes any sense I'd be surprised cuz I am running on about 2 hours of sleep in the last 36 hours so apologize if it doesn't make sense.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-19 13:42:01 +0000 UTCNo I get that. What I'm saying is that I think that machine is too advanced for what it is producing as far as the storyline goes. This machine is already making epic and legendary grade stuff on its own without any input from him. The point of mass production in our current society and likely in our future Society is not to create its own stuff is to duplicate what we have already created. This machine is literally taking his job away from him. I get it to cool advancement I I've read a little bit further in and I've seen at least the battle suit that is made haven't seen its capabilities yet but even with the essence restrictions that I've seen so far you could throw this at any of the second or third-year students and it would literally turn around this whole War for them. Sure it might only work for a couple hours but then it could be switched out to another person with a similar body type who could run their own Essence through it and as long as they kept on the rotation like that they could have a never-ending range of people pushing at their battle lines. I mean realistically you probably say 50 suits would get enough for a elite group that could switch out between people constantly and you'd have at least 500 or more people pushing it that line consistently Non-Stop. But the real point is with this machine is not so much that he built it or that he's experimenting with it but it's taking away his input for the crafting. How is he going to become a better Crafter? How is any piece of equipment that he ever goes into make going to become divine grade? How is anything that he goes into make going to become celestial grade? If he is not pushing his own abilities forward but relying on this machine. I think it just needs to be scaled down for it to work. I mean realistically now that it's got the pattern and as long as it gets really materials at it right now he could make several hundred of these suits without sacrificing too much as far as materials went. The machine has so many capabilities that he himself doesn't have or hasn't discovered yet about his own abilities that it's basically made every crafter in the world obsolete. I mean realistically Doc Ameye legendary stuff with more advanced automation but this machine is already at the same level without having full dungeon cores. This goes beyond something that I think could have been solved simply with his crafting ability. I mean realistically that the machine still has room to grow and be improved but we're seeing legendary grade equipment? Sorry ever grade that adapts to become legendary grade because he already had pieces that were of better quality in it. But still that essentially removes him from the process. I'm not saying the machine isn't great I'm not saying it shouldn't be there I'm saying that it's gone beyond what the story can handle. What's the point of any crafter doing anything when they could just keep throwing materials at this machine and it's going to come up with its own ideas? Sorry I know I'm long-winded and I appreciate the comment because it clarifies something that I didn't make clear. Definitely come back when I caught up, but again I'm kind of to the point where I'm wondering what's the point of reading a story when it's so far removed from the rest of the books. I'm a completionist when it comes to reading books and it would drive me nuts if I didn't finish it but there's a real big part of me that just doesn't want to keep going because he's crafted himself out of the picture and he's not keeping up with any of his friends none of the characters you've seen before with any real Focus are there. And I get what you mean about not contacting your friends but he's going through some serious emotional stuff he has never had friends before in his life and suddenly his parents have revealed that most of his life has been focused around a lie? I'm sorry that's something you go to your best friend to even if they're A Million Miles Away. Shit if I was on the moon and I had that kind of crisis I'd be shooting texts across the Galaxy to my best friend. And Brian did smooth out over a little bit by saying he wanted an unbiased opinion but at the same time Sal hasn't questioned anything about his new relationships when throughout the first three books he's questioned everybody at least a little bit. Thanks again for your input.
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-19 13:25:49 +0000 UTCYou should definitely come back to this comment after you’ve caught up. He made the machine as a project for his holidays and a big reason for its creation was his wish to provide his parents special lots for the auctions during his semesters. You can’t expect him not to play with its capabilities after building it so the focus on it is (imo) completely justified. The problem with him having next to no communication with Divinity is definitely understandable but I think there have been a few people who haven’t texted/called their friends during break and then caught up during the first few days after it… The part about Doc… well I totally agree xD
Dungeonborn
2024-11-19 12:12:05 +0000 UTCFirst time I’ve seen this uptake on Gallant but you definitely have a point. Gallant as is is a freaking hazard but if he is able to control his ability (not even necessarily his emotions) then he‘d be a real boon to anyone he works with.
Dungeonborn
2024-11-19 11:51:37 +0000 UTCYes I had the same thought. Its like a fury overflow so that your back at calm/robotic…
Dungeonborn
2024-11-19 11:39:24 +0000 UTCI was really excited when I read Dragoon and mounts. First thought was Vess and Jin form Unbound.
Dungeonborn
2024-11-19 11:32:04 +0000 UTCOkay I might be committing a major faux pie here. I am a huge fan of this series and you're writing is absolutely amazing. Haven't finished reading up to this point because I just signed up for your patreon account and I've been catching up. I'm at the part where he sacrifices his revolver. But I have to point something out and I hope you take this well because I don't mean to call out your writing or anything. I have to say this book feels kind of like a betrayal to the first three. I get that they're on a break from school and I get that they won't be hanging out so much but you have essentially eliminated all of his previous ties in the school. Sure he's had a couple conversations with upgrade and Barry and his other friends. But you've completely replaced the relationship with both upgrade and divinity for Fabi. He said it yourself in the beginning of these chapters that he overthinks everything but he has jumped right into trusting and interacting with his new person on the basis of watching a couple of her videos and working on her weave. Sure she's a good person but he hasn't overthinked thought a thing since they actually started talking. He hasn't interacted with his Lifeline at Quest Academy divinity. You can't deny that you set Divinity up as his lifeline. They've had so many interactions and so many nuance things happen to them but the minute he goes home to his parents she doesn't even text her dude. Now I've seen other authors do this. Life moves on things have to change the story has to be shaken up. I get all of that but whenever I've seen another author do this it's ended in one of two ways. About half the fan base love it. The other half see it as an actual betrayal of where you've gone with the story and drop the series dead. On its own if this wasn't part of a series this would be an absolutely fabulous book. So please don't misunderstand. But it feels like you're overreaching. Like this should be one or two books from where we're at in the series. He just had to sacrifice his revolver but he's essentially crafted himself out of crafting. He's relying on a machine rather than his own instincts in his own skills to grow. How is he going to grow as a Crafter or is a skill Master if he's not actually crafting his own stuff. I get that might come later but will he need to if he's got a machine that can essentially do it for him. In my personal opinion earlier in your novels it seemed like the best results he got were always from when he had all of himself invested. He had huge breakthroughs when he was making the visor and revolver. He made a crown for Divinity going by instinct that will make it two grades higher than his current cap on power. He didn't do that by letting something do it for him. He did that by putting all of his heart into the product. You did a beautiful job of pointing that out and it in my mind kind of solidified he and Divinity would eventually be more than just friends. But at the end of the last book she showed him a vision of the future that left him emotionally unstable because he found out that his Mentor is dead in that beautiful future that Divinity wants so bad. But he hasn't over thought it at all. He sees that Depot and he sees the line of shops and he's just knows that's going to be part of this future that Divinity wants but in all of her other Visions he pushes past what Divinity he wants and does better. Instead he kind of gives up and just accept that this is going to be the way it is. He's not putting his all into making sure there's a better outcome. He went through that big crafting jumble where he relied on those potions to give him better insights into his work and Essence programming. But it wasn't his actual doing it was the potions and yet this machine seems like a product that's going to go well beyond where that Crown could have gone. And it all happened without his actual feeling being put into the project. When it comes to the crafting I have to say I kind of want Doc Ameye a slap him a little bit and say that while you can automate a project it has to come after you have a product that can be duplicated. He's taken all the guess work out with that machine. What's the point of him actually learning to craft anymore when you can have a machine do it for him. Automotion can only come after innovation. And I think the mythcrafter ability has to be the Innovation part or he's going to stagnate. And I mean you've kind of put a limit on that by making it almost impossible for him to move this machine, but what's to stop in from Simply sending the plans over to the Argento workshop and having them print it out after he's come up with a plans. Why would he have to work on anything at all when you can just copy all the plans in that blueprint room throw them in the machine and have it do all the creation work for him. I guess it just seems that you're you are losing interest in this story series and are trying to rush to the end. Which I can't blame you for if you are. Sometimes we lose interest in things it's just the way it is. But I can't see a logical conclusion where you can continue the series when he's already essentially created something that can do all of his work for him in regards to crafting. He is at a point where he can't use the skill machine because of what happened at the gala. And now he's learning martial arts from his father and his armor is essentially a robot that feeds off of his Essence that's going to do all of his work for him. He no longer needs the workshop upgrade because he's got a machine that can print up uniforms for everybody in the academy in a couple of days with the right materials. There's no way that the hunters Bureau and anyone else involved in his life and the war won't just throw the resources at him that will get hundreds of people those uniforms. And because the uniforms are so magnificent in their capabilities even the Crafters can be thrown on the front lines without a worry. Maybe I'll change by the time I actually catch up to this point but that's what it seems like so far and because this is the most recent post I kind of wanted to give my input. Now, I'll totally get if you just ignore everything I said. It's your story and you need to tell it. But I'm telling you right now you'll break my heart if Sal and Divinity you don't get together. You've layered in too much for there not to be something in between them. And Barry's not really interested in her because he has too much fun messing with her and likes to chase after other girls. So you will break my heart if that happens. 😋
Jacob Meyers
2024-11-19 10:02:07 +0000 UTCThis is a common misconception I see about Gallant and I’m gonna repost this as a standalone comment so more people see it. Gallant didn’t show his true colors in the tower and I thoroughly hope Brian either shows this in the next book or corrects me instead. The way Gallants ability works is that he gets different boosts/powers depending on his positive emotions. When it upgraded, it not only increased his power but now it works on all of his emotions and boosted them all up to 11 at all times. So imagine Raven from 03 Teen Titans when one of her emotions got loose in her head. Or the emotions in Inside Out and anytime you feel one of them more than the other. That one emotion has complete control of the steering wheel in your head. Plus has a freaking super power. To use his ability, Gallant would need perfect control of his emotions, plus the ability to instantly switch between them depending on the situation to give him the right power. That is damn near impossible for your average, well adjusted person. This is a man with severe ptsd and mental trauma. He actively tried to kill the demons in the tower as quickly as possible while dealing with his mother and Erika who were making a life and death scenario even more dangerous. Erika was making things worse due to her lack of trust in her teammates. And Prestige did it by actively handicapping their team to make this test a real challenge. Despite all of that, Gallant was able to maintain a clear head for 4 levels of the tower. But when faced with a friggin obsidian hulker and dozens of demons, he built up enough bloodlust to break past a collar designed to turn off all of his emotions. And that small bit of bloodlust was enough to completely take him over and made him lash out at his team. That outburst wasn’t Gallant’s true colors. That was his team finally seeing a glimpse of what Gallant has to go through. I love Barry, but he greatly downplayed Gallant’s struggle. You cannot work through your emotions with a therapist if you're not allowed to express said emotions in any environment. And if Gallant took the necklace off during the therapy session, he’d level the fucking building! We don't know what powers he gets with his different emotions and he doesn’t either because he’s only used to the boosts from positive emotions. What if anger gives laser eyes, sadness gives him acid breath and depression turns him into a blackhole. Hell, even if they just give speed and strength boosts. Google the Hulk in a therapy session. It doesn’t end well for anybody involved. I really hope Sal does dungeon runs with Gallant because there is likely a ton of info that Sal would be able to learn from him. And if Gallant gets his power under control, he would very quickly become Sal’s strongest ally.
Darnell Maxwell
2024-11-19 07:33:34 +0000 UTC1) I know Sal’s not gonna do the immortality weave thing. If he did then this series would end in two more books max. He gets the weave, crafts mythic tier nukes, then goes into portals to set them off himself. Rinse and repeat. I just said it because if I was in the book, this is exactly what I would tell Sal to do. 2) This is a common misconception I see about Gallant and I’m gonna repost this as a standalone comment so more people see it. Gallant didn’t show his true colors in the tower and I thoroughly hope Brian either shows this in the next book or corrects me instead. The way Gallants ability works is that he gets different boosts/powers depending on his positive emotions. When it upgraded, it not only increased his power but now it works on all of his emotions and boosted them all up to 11 at all times. So imagine Raven from 03 Teen Titans when one of her emotions got loose in her head. Or the emotions in Inside Out and anytime you feel one of them more than the other. That one emotion has complete control of the steering wheel in your head. Plus has a freaking super power. To use his ability, Gallant would need perfect control of his emotions, plus the ability to instantly switch between them depending on the situation to give him the right power. That is damn near impossible for your average, well adjusted person. This is a man with severe ptsd and mental trauma. He actively tried to kill the demons in the tower as quickly as possible while dealing with his mother and Erika who were making a life and death scenario even more dangerous. Erika was making things worse due to her lack of trust in her teammates. And Prestige did it by actively handicapping their team to make this test a real challenge. Despite all of that, Gallant was able to maintain a clear head for 4 levels of the tower. But when faced with a friggin obsidian hulker and dozens of demons, he built up enough bloodlust to break past a collar designed to turn off all of his emotions. And that small bit of bloodlust was enough to completely take him over and made him lash out at his team. That outburst wasn’t Gallant’s true colors. That was his team finally seeing a glimpse of what Gallant has to go through. I love Barry, but he greatly downplayed Gallant’s struggle. You cannot work through your emotions with a therapist if you're not allowed to express said emotions in any environment. And if Gallant took the necklace off during the therapy session, he’d level the fucking building! We don't know what powers he gets with his different emotions and he doesn’t either because he’s only used to the boosts from positive emotions. What if anger gives laser eyes, sadness gives him acid breath and depression turns him into a blackhole. Hell, even if they just give speed and strength boosts. Google the Hulk in a therapy session. It doesn’t end well for anybody involved. I really hope Sal does dungeon runs with Gallant because there is likely a ton of info that Sal would be able to learn from him. And if Gallant gets his power under control, he would very quickly become Sal’s strongest ally.
Darnell Maxwell
2024-11-19 07:32:49 +0000 UTC>You can drop stuff like finding people's classes and q cred amounts. System was needed to help understand the output of Analysis. However if Sal can include Judgement, Cypher, and Zenith as their own attributes meaning it only takes 3 slots rather than 11 between the three then that can leave a massive amount of room for additional features and growth. The immortality weave is an interesting concept, but I don't know if it'd be possible to make that combination. Plus it would rob a lot of the personal risk that drives the story. IMO, even though Prestige needs Sal alive and strong for Gallant to have a normal life, I don't know how good the relationship will be between the two after the events on floor 5 of the tower. Gallant had been showing some problematic personality traits before then, but he really pulled back the curtain on his real personality on floor 5; and I'm not sure Sal will be able to walk that one back to have a normal relationship with him. And yes, some kind of heavily empowered psionic protection that he wears essentially at all times seems like a very good idea. I kind of like the idea of a low profile circlet like Ozymandias in the Watchmen series wears, but for something you're potentially wearing even when asleep, maybe something like a ring, a hook over the ear, or something like that would be more appropriate.
Kerradeph
2024-11-19 06:40:29 +0000 UTC79 seemed reasonable to me. Sal's trying to keep it under control and not really wanting to confront his parents with it. It ends up spilling out when he starts to say anything. Having been through the same kind of moment, it felt quite real in terms of how it happened. The moment has been resolved, but it opens up issues that will on the minds of both sides for some time to come. It's less about having an outright screaming match and more just getting your side out for the other side to think about.
Kerradeph
2024-11-19 06:25:21 +0000 UTCDragoons have been around for quite some time as a standard military unit. Although, the comment about getting him a mount is a bit curious on what kind of mount. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dragoon
Kerradeph
2024-11-19 06:20:24 +0000 UTCLong post: After reading through these chapters I gotta say, the writing is beautiful. The characters are likable and well rounded. The support and love Sal is getting from his parents is great. No doubt he needed it after the events of the first semester. But it was not what I expected. At this point in the novel I feel like a major conflict should have arisen. Something that leads to a climatic moment. Granted Fabi's skill implant was pretty climatic, but it happens so early in the book that it's more like an act one payoff. Sal says it perfectly when he says,"Those who understand what Skill-Master can really do, fill me with all kinds of disastrous scenarios where I'll be kidnapped by Bastion, held by the Hunter's Bureau... abducted by the guilds." I guess I was one of those expecting a disastrous scenario. There's been alot of development and foundations layed for the next book. Sal has made alot of progress on starting the new trainee guild. Legacy has definitely been delivering. I read Saviors again last week. With the last book fresh on my mind I can't help but have questions. Gallant. What has he been up too during this break? It sounded at the end like he would be training with Robert. Prestige seemed on board with the idea. If Robert can really beat some sense into ol' Brody then he would make an excellent addition to the guild. Sal's rewards from Quest included a visit to Ameye Locomotives. I imagine getting to work with Ameye and meet his AI's is coming. One more thing. Can Sal please build Divinity a new weave when he gets back. One that ultimately makes Divinity's powers work better. She earned a skill implant as well I believe. Running a dungeon that let's him get a load of Lux Crystals so he can make those wings for hers would be cool (Of course unlocking a weave for her that includes the real wings would be even cooler). Anyway. Thanks for the chapters. Thanks for the great writing and I'm so glad I get to be here to watch it all come together.
Chris Hoopes
2024-11-19 04:18:02 +0000 UTC1) "Do you really think I'm ready for that?" "I know you are." FUUUUUUUUUUUCK! I was gonna make a joke about Sal finally growing a pair for going into a prowler dungeon. But then you gotta go and write this wholesome ass moment that melts my cold dead heart! God, Sal's parents are the best! 2) Sal, you want someone to tell you what to do. Fine, here it goes. First make a new visor with all, or most of the same functions as your current one before it became legendary. You can drop stuff like finding people's classes and q cred amounts. Just need to be able to scan/store weaves and be able to connect to your current visor from a large distance. That way you can start making a network where they mentally piggyback off eachother. Next you spend a day scanning and storing every weave on campus. Then you go to your room and don't leave it until you've fused the perfect weave with your guidance counselor's immortality and that healing ability from the dude on Sakura's team. Make that fusion weave the one that gets permanently added to your body. Finally, spend a week testing out different abilities you've copied. You're immortal and can heal yourself now so there is no risk. Now you're unstoppable and can spend the rest of your time at school doing three things. First is hanging out with friends because self care is your greatest weakness. Second is crafting because ya still love that and no matter how good your upgraded uniform is, you can do better. Third, once a week you go on a dungeon run with Brophy. When dungeons get too easy you move onto towers. You should be soloing portals by the time you graduate. You don't need to constantly be on the front lines the rest of your life. Never leave the workshop after you graduate for all I care. But the insight will tell you what warriors that are constantly on the front lines need from crafters. And Brophy made you that promise so hold him to it. Besides he needs to do runs like this anyway to get q cred and afford the perfect ability. That's gonna be your long term plan from now til you graduate. As for what to do after that. Don't worry about it. You somehow think too much and not enough as it is. Focus on the present for a couple of months. Also make sure your school uniform includes constant protection from mental and spiritual attacks. I don't care if you don't want Erika to think you're scared of her. The mind is the biggest weakness of an immortal. There are plenty of mind fuckers working for the bastion and the demons who would love to turn you into their puppet. Stop being a moron and protect that brain of yours. 3) Glad we got that little heart to heart with Sal and his folks. 4) Sweet, back to crafting next week.
Darnell Maxwell
2024-11-19 04:00:38 +0000 UTCReally good chapters! The only thing that was not on point, I think, was maybe Pedro not calling Sal out on his trust issues on taking the prowler boss down. Sal has every right to have those, but if you want to remove his security bubble you have to let him know. Not to blame him just to point out his emotions so he will be a bit more stable in the future. But just my thoughts and you did a great job with the conversations after the dungeons.
Benjamin Hartmann
2024-11-19 01:10:22 +0000 UTCLoved these chapters. It’s great to see Sal’s growth. I would like to share my thought that Sal is giving a lot of supplies to Arkwright and not getting much payoff. Will we start to see the machine become productive?
Dawn Zeleznik
2024-11-19 00:59:43 +0000 UTCGreat chapters! Really loved seeing Sal's character growth over the last few chapters. It was nice to him really start to come into his own in the dungeons, and then really begin reconciling things with his parents. As for the book cover - if you're still thinking of using Legacy as the name, then I think you should really Include at least one of his parents in the cover. Some ideas there: - The skill implant scene, when Sophia jumps in to heal Sal - Sal sparring with Petro and Sophia (maybe with the arkwright up the stairs in the background?) - Sal and Petro in the prowler dungeon, looking up at the red prowler?
Spencer Foreman
2024-11-18 23:35:49 +0000 UTCLoving the book so far Somethings felt off with chapter 79. It feels like it only just touched the surface of Sals problems and could be expanded alot. It feels like a good character growth opportunity and could be pushed alot more. Also it feels like Sal isn't angry with his parents. We know he's angry with them. But it doesn't feel like it. To me as a reader it feels like Sal isn't angry just slightly frustrated. We spend enough time following Sals thoughts to know him. But chapter 79 felt wrong, too much logic not enough emotion. He almost felt robotic and we know sal isn't a robot. Which is further compounded with the start of chapter 80 when Sal mentions it. to me as a reader it doesn't feel like a family crisis it, more a misunderstanding that was amicably resolved. I hope I make sense and sorry for the rambling. Again I'm liking the book and thanks for the chapters
Samuel Arbon
2024-11-18 23:21:44 +0000 UTCI loved the latest chapters. To see Sal start showing some confidence in himself and building a better relationship with his parents. The story needs to show real growth in each character and these latest chapters do it. Well done Brian.
Ron Blondeau
2024-11-18 22:26:40 +0000 UTCDidn't they say he could "become a dragoon" too? Do they have Wyverns or something? Because that word has some (final) fantasy implications
michael pigott
2024-11-18 21:33:05 +0000 UTCThank you for all the chapters they are awesome! It was great to get to see Sal putting his worries and fears into words and getting it all out there. He's grown so much from the first book and he just keeps improving and developing. I loving how you are showing that. The mount comment has me so intrigued. Like what the heckin heck!? I need to know more and I can hardly wait to see where that little tidbit goes.
Michelle Ray
2024-11-18 21:21:49 +0000 UTCGreat chapters, loving that Sal grows in so many ways
Alteron
2024-11-18 21:11:17 +0000 UTCI had a lovely weekend, thanks for all the chapters, you rock :)
Michael Stewart
2024-11-18 21:05:14 +0000 UTCBook cover recommendation: the Doom Scythe. But seriously the chapters were awesome. I really can’t wait for dr bobby after hearing about the mounts. What animals are hiding in the tower/skyscrapper at quest academy
Nate
2024-11-18 20:40:28 +0000 UTCThanks for all the chapters
gideon ferrier
2024-11-18 20:19:37 +0000 UTC
