STAW Vol 1. pt. 11

((3 of 3!))

Every evil overlord needs henchmen.

After hiring Miyael and Azmolan, I sent Lilith back out to find more potential recruits, put Azmolan in charge of the goblins and told him that I want this entire manor spotless within the next twenty-four hours, and I have had Miyael with me in my room studying from the many books available to us.

When she returns for the second time, she brings me a group of nine that I am able to employ seven of. The seven just so happen to all be more goblins just like the six already left here.

She really likes her goblins.

The seven latest goblins join the first six in serving underneath Azmolan, and he makes sure to let me know that I have already given him more power and treated him more honorably than in his decades of service underneath the Black Scales tribe.

To my surprise, this manor actually had a servants’ quarters hidden underneath goblin filth. Azmolan saw to it that it was one of the first things cleaned up, and now he and his goblin workers have a proper room to sleep in. As for Miyael, I assigned him to sleep in what used to be Lilith’s brother’s room.

Something else I have implemented is a strict lights-out policy at nine p.m. Sleep is important. As somebody who was in charge of managing others and has been managed myself, I know firsthand just how valuable a healthy sleep schedule is. Therefore, everybody is required to get a minimum of eights hours of sleep every night. Morning activities will begin at six a.m. but those who wake up beforehand are welcome to either start early or spend the time relaxing doing free activities. Furthermore, everybody is entitled to thirty-minute breaks for breakfast, lunch, and dinner with an additional two fifteen-minute breaks spread throughout the day. Work lasts from six a.m. until six p.m. Two hours after the working day end will be receiving lessons regarding management of employees and resources, writing in English, math, and teaching them of Earth’s history and technology. The days where I am not teaching will have free time instead, and all days will have the final hour before lights out being designated as free time.

Of course, while I demand that everybody else sleeps, this does not mean that I am going to obey my own rules. I know, I am a hypocrite. I simply understand my body and know that I am able to be fully rested after only five hours of sleep, so I can use these additional three hours to continue studying this world’s history.

And then it hits me.

There is still one thing that I need. There is one belonging I require that will unconditionally love, respect, and obey me.

That’s right.

The superior pet.

A dog.

I am sure that this underworld has some sort of equivalent to a dog if not regular dogs. I wonder if it will be like in classic horror movies regarding Hell where Dobermans were always seen as hellhounds?

It has been so long since I have had a dog. The last one I owned was several years ago and hit by a car.

I think it is time for a new dog.

To pass the time until it is time to go and make Lilith bring me to where I can buy a dog, I actually head to bed early for once.

I will admit that getting more than five hours of sleep every now and then can be nice.

The following morning, I head downstairs and the scent of cooked food immediately reaches my nostrils.

It clearly smells like food, but I have no idea what it could possibly be.

I make my way into the kitchen and see Azmolan with what appears to be a large, roasted chunk of… something’s tail. It has a green skin and purple, oozing interior.

“I am adding cooking lessons to our night lessons,” I tell him.

Azmolan speaks up, “I know how it may look, my lord, but this is a delica—”

“It makes me think of Barney, and I am not going to eat roasted Barney.”

Lilith comes into the kitchen from behind me. “Is – is that roasted Barnake tail?” she asks as salivates.

“Hurry up and eat it. We are leaving afterward.”

“We are? Where, Milord?”

“I’m going to get a pet dog.”

Both Azmolan and Lilith look at me with wide eyes and dropped jaws as if I said something utterly insane.

“What?” I ask.

“A dog? Milord, you realize – you realize that dogs are… well, dogs, right, Milord?” Lilith asks.

“My lord, I trust in your capability as a candidate, but there are very few capable of handling dogs,” Azmolan says.

“They’re dogs. You take them out, feed them, and walk them. That is all there is to it,” I explain.

The two of them gulp.

“Now, eat your breakfast, toss any leftovers down to Charlie so that I do not have to look at roasted Barney there once we return, and finish getting this place cleaned up,” I order them.

Lilith looks distressed the entire time she eats, and when it’s finally time for her to lead me to where I can buy a dog, she drags her feet and asks me an annoying amount of times whether I am sure or not. Even after I ask my usual line about her if she is doubting me, she assures me that she is just greatly concerned and does not see how this could ever end well.

She leads me to a cave outside of the lower city. I have to admit, by the time we reach it, I am out of breath and I feel as if my legs are going to fall off. I have not walked this far of a distance in… ever before in my lifetime, and I am going to have to walk the entire distance back. It does not help that I am running on an empty stomach, either.

“This – this is it, Milord. Are you sure? Like, are you really, really, really sure? Milord, Milord?” Lilith repeats.

“For the final time, Lilith, I want to buy a dog. Now, is this the store?” I ask.

“It’s not a store, Milord. It’s their den. Many have tried to become their alpha to tame them, but none have ever succeeded. They are vicious, terrifying creatures that will rip the throats out of anybody who threatens them, they can breathe fire, and – and…”

I place a hand on Lilith’s shoulder.

“It will be fine, Lilith. I know how to handle a dog. I was expecting to visit a pet shop, but—”

“Oh! I can take you to a pet shop!”

“What do the pet shops in this place even sell if not dogs?”

“Fish, of course!”

I look around. There is not a single body of water anywhere that I can see, but plenty of magma. Yet, the pet stores apparently sell fish.

“I’m going to go and get a dog now,” I say.

“Wait!” Lilith grabs onto my jacket. “I… I want to go with you, but…”

“Then stay here, Lilith. I do not need you to come with me, and you would likely get yourself killed if they are anywhere near as bad as you say they are.”

“Uuu… good luck, Milord. Please come back, okay? We all need you to come back, Milord!”

“I’ll be back, so don’t worry about it.”

With that, I swat her hand off of my jacket and head into the cave.

The cave is long, twisting, and dark. There are piles of bones every now and then, stains of blood on the walls and ground, and vicious scratch marks that have been scarred into the cave’s rock.

A flickering light shining against the cave’s walls guides me toward where I believe the dogs must be.

Honestly, even if they are vicious and wild dogs with no social skills that want to turn me into a meal, they can be dealt with. I have always been very good with dogs, and I used to want to be a dog trainer when I was younger.

I am sure some would say that what I am doing is incredibly stupid, irresponsible, unrealistic, foolish, or unbecoming of my narcissistic intelligence. However, no matter what anybody says, I just cannot take dogs being a threat to me seriously. To others? Sure, because others are idiotic. To me? No, there is no dog that I cannot befriend and turn into a loyal companion.

Am I foolish or too stubborn for believing that? No, and you are not welcome to think that either because you clearly do not know me if you would ever entertain such a thought.

I turn the next corner of the cave before me and see something that makes me think that, just maybe, I may have made a mistake here.

A dog raises her head off of her paws and looks up at me before yawning. Her fur – or rather, her skin, is as black as charcoal. Her eyes glow a burning color similar to that of the ocean of magma outside, there are two large and incredibly fluffy ears on top of her head and her long, flowing black hair, and… well, she looks more like a human than a dog. She certainly does look like a dog from her kneecaps down to her feet as they are covered in black and red fur with her feet being similar to a very large dog’s paws each one with nails longer and sharper than most daggers. Her arms from her biceps to her hands are covered in the same hair, and her hands are huge paws as big as her head with finger-like claws just as sharp as her nails and the fangs that she is now baring at me.

Her bushy tail stays still behind her as her ears twitch at every noise I make.

Oh, and her breasts are just slightly less obnoxious than Lilith’s when it comes to size, but the fact that she is almost completely naked aside from some thin strips of metal covering her nipples and crotch makes her more obnoxious overall.

I may be old, but I am still a man and am going to notice a woman's breasts no matter how little physical effect they have on me.

Well, let’s see just how much of a dog she is.