Shrek 2’s Perfect Climax ft. Bonnie Tyler

What’s up friends! So this month I just finished a huge video essay that I’ve been working on for a little while and it took up most of my spare time this month. And you may be thinking, “Kevin, if one project took you that much time to complete, maybe you could look into being more efficient. Try setting timers or writing everything down on a calendar.” And to that I say, “you’re right but no! Planning what nerds do and I’m right to do things my way.”

So today, instead of focusing on an entire movie or piece of work, I’m going to dissect one of my favorite moments in cinema. Have you guess what it is? 

Correct! (you read the title of this article, you devil you.)

It’s the climax of Shrek 2 and why the “I Need a Hero” sequence is so impactful. Not as analytical a topic, I know, but if there is anything I’ve learned from English literature in high school, its that I’ll find a way to pull a moral out of my ass. 

The great thing about Shrek 2 is that it’s pretty universally beloved. There might be some debate over weather or not the movie supersedes it predecessor, but its an objectively great movie and I feel like I can say that without feeling like I have to defend myself right away. 

So, let’s recap. In Shrek 2, (A movie I totally don’t have to defend loving) Shrek is feeling like an outcast and more pressured than ever to fit into regular society due to his inherited throne. He decided to take a potion that will turn him and Fiona beautiful. The evil Fairy Godmother devises a way to switch her son, Prince Charming with Shrek, thus tricking Fiona into kissing Prince Charming by midnight thus causing the spell to be permanent. Hours before midnight, the Royal Family throw a massive ball with dancing and music, and Shrek devises a plan break into the castle and take back his woman!

Ok so now that we’ve set the stage. Let’s dive into this behemoth of a sequence because we have a lot to cover. Here is the link. So everyone can follow along. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WI0mSEzttx8

Ok lets’ start with the song. 

I back in 2003 I remember thinking that Jimi Hendrix covering Bob Dylan was going to be my favorite cover ever, then 2004 comes and Jennifer Saunders screams “Hit it” into the camera and it was all over. 

I really love how the emotional tone of the film is matched perfectly with the song playing. This quintessential 80’s ballad works so well with the story about racing against the clock to save your true love. Plus, it’s the single best use of the song in a cinematic context. Let’s take a fun trip back in time and compare how this song is used emotionally to its debut it 1984 in Footloose. Remember Footloose? It’s fine that you didn’t. Footloose is garbage and I’ll explain why. There is a scene where “I Need a Hero” plays while 2 characters are playing a game of chicken with two tractors near a ditch. Kevin Bacon, attempts to chicken out first, but his shoe lace gets caught in on the gas pedal and can’t. The other guy, (I can’t remember the characters name but I really don’t care enough to google and I don’t see you doing it anytime soon either. That’s how much of an impact footloose has on us) Anyway, Kevin Bacon wins the game of chicken on accident and is revered as a cool kid because of a fortunate mishap. Like I said, It’s complete garbo. When Footloose first came out, I “I Need a Hero” barely made top 100 on the charts, 2 years later, it was re-released with Bonnie Tyler’s album and it rose faster than an 8$ balloon at Disneyland that a 2 year old just let go of. I blame this tactless tractor scene from Footloose for it’s initial disappointment. 

OK, back to the present day.

In Musicals, when a character stops and sings about their emotions or how they feel about someone, I’ve always found it hard to connect with the heavy amounts of dramatic narcissism. But in the setting the movie created, Fairy Godmother is creating a performance for people to watch and distract everyone at the ball. It beautifully fits the character, and ads a new dimension to what we would normally see from a fairy tale villain (maybe because “viewing fairy tales in a new light” is the whole point of Shrek and its themes through the first 2 films)

The choir of people, the French horns and the unapologetic dramatic action is the perfect combination that gets my blood a boiling (in a good way). I can’t get enough of it. The sequence is fun, it gets right to the point, and it does a good job representing the original song despite being a rearranged cover. 

For the rest of the time I have with you I’m going to go through the lyrics and musical vibrato to drive home my point of how freaking good I think this whole sequence is. 

    We begin with Fairy Godmother telling the pianist play the song in C minor.  Like a true queen. (I just did a flourish with my hand and it was very dramatic) Then the lyrics begin.

    “Where have all the good men gone, and where are all the gods?” – we see Fiona being asked to dance as the main antagonist (Prince Charming) is looking to make his final kiss. This sets the tone and the steaks.

    The mood is very romantic and slow, until the Godmother shouts “Hit it” and a choir magically appears in harmony while the violins kick in for maximum drama. We cut to Shrek riding a giant gingerbread man named Mongo as he plans to break into the castle. 

    “He's gotta be strong, and he's gotta be fast ,and he's gotta be fresh from the fight – Mongo approaches the castle with Shrek prepping him for ramming into the castle.

    “And he's gotta be larger than life! Larger than life” –  The Knights protecting the castle retaliate as they launch a giant ball of magma at Mongo, hitting his gumdrop button and falling off of him. He gives out a war cry and kicks the now molten gumdrop back at the castle. 

By the way, I’m already on the edge of my seat. Name a more action packed movie? that’s right you can’t!

    “Somewhere just beyond my reach, there's someone reaching back for me”- Fiona and Prince Charming are dancing while Fiona is pulling away as much as possible. She suspects something is wrong and doesn’t trust the man in front of her. Mongo stomps closer to the draw bridge. 

    “It's gonna take a superman to sweep me off my feet” – Mongo uses his immense strength to pull the drawbridge open. 

    “Up where the mountains meet the heavens above, out where the lightning splits the sea” – the beat begins to pick up and a piano starts improvising in the background. Prince charming gets a little more into and becomes a little more frisky indicating that Shrek doesn’t have much time. 

As we enter the bridge of the song, Mongo pulls on the drawbridge of the castle. See that? see what I did there? This movie is too cool. I love it.

    Through the wind, and the chill, and the rain, and the storm, and the flood – Knights protecting the castle dump milk on top of the giant gingerbread, the cookie begins to break under the pressure. 

Side note. The water effects created in this movie are really good and I love how they look. 

   “I can feel his approach like a fire in my blood” – Shrek makes it inside the castle

    We have a string quartet come in while Charming and Fiona are still dancing. Charming makes a move but Fiona rejects it. The Fairy Godmother reappears to bring the song home 

    “I need a hero, I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night”- Shrek mounts Donkey and rides into the castle

    “And he's gotta be larger than life” – Puss n’ Boots, the tiny cat hops off donkey to protect the other two from the hoard of knights chasing them, thus solidifying his usefulness to the team. 

    As the song ends, and charming is about the plant a wet one on Fiona, Shrek breaks though the double doors and stops everything. Abruptly ending the event. 

I love this movie and I love these characters. I think it was so clever to generate the climax like this. It has everything in it a good Shrek movie should have. Camp, drama, fairy tale juxtaposition, and a dope soundtrack. I think about this moment way too much and I hope sharing it with you today has made me seem a little less crazy. Actually now that I type all this out, I realize it’s probably doing the opposite. Oh well. 

Thank you again for all your support. I really appreciate you! And make sure you have a wonderful day!