Thighjob Surprise

... by SkinRays

Note: You won't miss much if you skip the backstory. Was written after the movie was done anyway.

BLUEBOLT is practicing his testimony with THE SUIT. The rest of THE AGGRAVATORS stand cross-armed nearby in a semicircle. Murmurs and laughter die down.  BlueBolt shakes his head in response to a question from a pretty young ASSISTANT whose gaze lingers on his lap a little longer than he finds comfortable. He waves her away. More laughter but it is suppressed by shushing.

SUIT:  BlueBolt, can you summarize the events of June 10, 2085, when you traveled off world?

BLUEBOLT: While pursuing The Mandarin's Nephew, I got lost in an abandoned Mars Colony. Well, I soon found it was no longer abandoned! It belongs to the Shanghai Democratic Republic now.

Before I could pull out my...  [laughter, shushing again.]

Signal Finder, ok? Before I could pull out my signal finder, well, there she was.

SUIT: Who?

BLUEBOLT: Damned if I know.

SUIT: Go on.

BLUEBOLT: Stunned, I could only stand there staring like an idiot. I started getting, you know, hard. Almost right away.

BlueBolt shoots a quick look at The Aggravators, daring them to judge. They stir. The SCARLET BIMBO holds a hand over her mouth. Her upper body shakes with silent laughter. BlueBolt gives her a  look that says "Really?" and continues.

BLUEBOLT: I approached her slowly.  Hot young thing. But definitely over 18! Maybe 24 Earth years. What was a hot spinner like her doing in a place like this?

SCARLET BIMBO: You didn't actually ask her that, did you? [laughter again]

SUIT: I'm running this interrogation, SB. Go on, BlueBolt.

BLUEBOLT: I tried to make small talk, but she had none of it. Soon I was flat on my back, before I could get a word out. She somehow tied me to a fence!

SUIT: Somehow?

BLUEBOLT: It went by fast, ok?

I was in a fog. She sapped me of my powers relentlessly, using the most firm, powerful, sleek pair of thighs I ever came across.

SCARLET: Which he did, in under 3 minutes! 

BLUEBOLT: Hey! 

The crowd erupts. The Suit flips a switch and the crowd dissipates. Holograms.

Silence fills the room. The Aggravators stand bemused.

BLUEBOLT: It was like my dick had a mind of its own. She drained the blood from my brain straight to my dick. I was in a daze, not able to think. It grew and grew. My balls inflated too.

SUIT: You are being recorded BlueBolt.

BLUEBOLT: Yeah, I don't give a fuck.

She destroyed me. Remade me. Both at once.

NARRATOR (walking on a pedestrian bridge in front of The Hall of Aggravators, or what's left of it.) Some say BlueBolt's cock grew three inches that day, so powerful were the thighs that stretched and kneaded him.  

BLUEBOLT: I thought I might lose the head of my dick! The pressure at the time of release was intense!

NARRATOR (flipping up clipped-on sunglasses, squinting)  He couldn't walk for a week.

BLUEBOLT: My dickhead is purple to this very day.

He moves to unzip for show & tell. Some yell "Geez" and turn away. The S.B.  isn't affected. She nods and raises an eyebrow.

SCARLET BIMBO: Nice.

---

BlueBolt and Scarlet Bimbo walk from the room after the testimony

BLUEBOLT: Should I go back there or not? I kind of want to go back there.

SCARLET BIMBO: Careful babe. She might not be so merciful next time! Oh, did I tell you I know who she is?

Narrator is caught off guard having just taken a big bite out of a sandwich.

NARRATOR: Oin us nex veek when shmoble bobble erks the meeple doffle.

--- Not to be continued. Ever. ----

Music is "Getaway Powder" By DJ Freedom