MHA WIP (Rough)
Added 2018-09-19 23:51:44 +0000 UTCComments and suggestions welcome, Nothing on spelling and grammar please, I fix that later.
Comments
Sadly, Mineta is required, he's in the pic this is being written to. I admit, it makes this story harder to do as I hate him as well. As to how the girls get during sex, as I write them more, there'll be subtle changes to make them more distinctive from one another. Thanks for the feedback :)
Don Hernandez
2018-09-20 10:51:10 +0000 UTCMy only suggestion would be to remove Mineta, but that's just because I hate him hahaha. It looks fine so far, though a general suggestion. All the girls seem to basically morph into one whenever sex happens and I mean that in the sense of talking and how they act. So while it doesn't have to be here, I think making them act differently from each other during sex could help a lot at making them stand out. Also Bakugo's constant yelling, while in character, can be grating but I imagine that's one of the multiple reasons why some people dislike him so much. He just gets annoying to listen to or read. That's not really in your control though as it's just his character.
Futazon
2018-09-20 10:47:34 +0000 UTC
