Don't freak out, I can explain (Video)

Video link: https://files.catbox.moe/8b8wcx.mp4

"Believe me, I've already done enough freaking out for both of us, and I'm over it. I need you to be able to move past it too. Yes, I know it's weird hearing my voice coming out of a body like this... -grunt-

So, what happened was...I got into a fender bender this morning, I was driving past a coffee shop and this lady pulled out right in front of me without even looking. Real obvious who was at fault here. She begged me not to report it, because she was on some kind of probation thing and could lose her license, but it's not like I really had much choice, I had to file a report for my own protection and insurance too, you understand...and I guess the cop didn't do a very good job of calming her down, so she started yelling stuff at us, calling us both pigs. I didn't think too much of it...kept going, long story short, I started feeling oddly bloated, really kind of sick, and I took a quick glance in the vanity mirror...when I saw a pig staring back at me, I actually careened off the road into a ditch. Yeah. Managed to crawl out, still not really believing what I was seeing, and then people started pointing at me and filming me with their phones. So then I REALLY lost it and ran off into the woods, and I got lost, and couldn't bear the pressure from all the weight gain anymore and had to lose the clothes...eventually found my way back to a road I recognized, but couldn't risk being seen again so I had to take things slow. So...you probably wondered where your roommate was at all this time, here I am, a frazzled, exhausted pig woman who more than anything else needs a nap.

I have to assume wherever that cop is, it probably affected her too, and she's the one who took down that woman's information...that's kind of my only clue for getting back to normal. Hopefully nothing awful has happened and we can try to touch base tomorrow..." -snrrk-