Elle Rose

Botanic Gardens Adventure

Added 2023-05-31 04:09:08 +0000 UTC

It was so good for me to get out of the house for a non-physical therapy appointment! I had a lot of anxiety and because my bowel program did not go well that morning, I ended up having an accident at the end of the day after we got home. So I went again today to the Gardens to explore the indoor part which is like a tropical paradise… I'll be posting about that next. It was good to have a redo of the day before my caregiver Ella moves out of state. I have updates about everything that is happening and my new caregiver who is in training, I will try to make a podcast or video soon, I'm just a little overwhelmed with emotions about Ella leaving and I'm a little nervous about whenever something big happens like this or whenever a big change happens. I never used to fear change before my injury, in fact I embraced it, however now I need to be able to control things in my life to some extent to feel normal. That's why I like to control what I wear and how I look because I can't make my own changes independently. I also have a constant fear that I will be forgotten about or neglected and left alone. Little outings like this help me to distract myself and Garner inspiration from nature and the beauty of flowers and how they can't walk either, and they don't really give a damn.