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[REND] 10 - An Inquisitive Tower

Sgt. Jeremiah Hall (Tower Cop)

Sgt. Jeremiah Hall of the La Esperanza City Police Department scratched his greying stubble while Capt. Ward hollered at him over the phone. Hall mumbled ‘Yes, sir’ a few times, adding grunts of agreement to appease the irate captain without particularly listening to what the latter was saying. Hall kept his eyes on the road, wondering when the van would pass by.

“Hall? Are you still there?” Ward barked. “Were you listening to what I just said?”

“Here, sir. Let’s see. The BID is sending a high-ranking goldeye. No more searching the files of the Adumbrae attack. Focus on the Martinez case for this week because the mayor wants something good to announce to the press. That time-wasting seminar is next Wednesday. Have I already said not to search the Adumbrae attack files?”

“You did,” Ward said. Then he sighed, continuing with a softer tone. “Look, Hall, I know why you’re doing this. That was a long time ago, okay?”

Hall took a deep breath. The captain was wrong—this wasn’t connected to that incident—but he didn’t want to argue about it. He sat there, clearing his mind of his mistake years ago. There was no repaying that. He had learned a valuable lesson about investigating thoroughly before accusing.  

“Don’t make this your penance,” Ward continued. “Enough of your… solo jaunts, like the one you’re doing now. I didn’t back your promotion for you to ruin your career. Castan told me that you left him behind. Anyway, the BID is taking over. There’s something more to this case, is what I’ve heard. We’re going to give them the files, and that’s that.”

The incomplete files, Hall thought, deciding not to say it out loud. It wouldn’t do him any good arguing with Ward. The captain was a good man trapped by circumstances. Near retirement, the captain wouldn’t risk stirring the nest.

Instead, Hall said, “Copy, sir. No more solo jaunts.”

They both knew that he wasn’t going to stop. There were times when he had to trust his instincts and do what needed to be done. This was such a time.

“Tell you what, Hall,” Ward said. “How about you join the team liaising with the goldeye? In some way, you’re still on the case. That’s the most I can offer you.”

“Are you serious?” Hall wondered what the catch was, but couldn’t think of any at present. This might be a sort of appeasement from the captain. They did go way back. Or maybe, the captain wanted to push him to annoy the BID instead.

“You’ve worked with goldeyes, right? Back when they had golden eyes. Buddy-buddy with them. Anyway, wrap up what you’re doing where you are. I want none of that starting tomorrow. The BID agent comes Monday.” The call ended with a beep.

“Goldeyes…” Hall smiled, recalling his younger years. Years ago, the eyes of BID agents glinted gold—a special material in their bionic eyes made it so. He first met them around the time of the McHunter scandal. BID agents swarmed the city, getting up in everyone’s business. It might happen again.

What if I report the missing videos to the BID? Hall was sure several pieces of evidence of the Adumbrae attack had gone missing in the past few days. They were there before. He had reviewed them. Now, they were gone. The reasons he’d been getting ranged from they had already been transferred to the BID to that he was hallucinating about them. If something criminally irregular was happening, he wasn’t that recklessly brave to rattle the cage and paint a target on his back so needlessly. He had Ramello to think of. Enemies knew where to him back.

He’d restrict himself to these ‘solo jaunts’, as Ward put it, until he’d gather something concrete. Then he has to discreetly contact the BID, making sure that whoever he’d approach wasn’t connected to the anomalies going on. He hoped the goldeye would be spotless clean.

Hall took out his trusty notebook. He lost count of how many notebooks he had filled with clues and thoughts over his career. He flipped to the page headed with the name ‘Erind Hartwell.’

“Officer Knowles,” Hall read the first line.

Knowles was one of the police officers who died during the Adumbrae attack. She had the distinction of ramming one of the abominations with her cruiser to save a civilian—Erind Hartwell. The cruiser’s dashcam might not have provided the clearest of videos, but Hall’s instincts prodded him when he saw Erind Hartwell. That was her, no doubt.

Hall could think of several reasons why Hartwell lied that she wasn’t present during the Adumbrae attack. She might be afraid of being interrogated by the police. She might think she’d get tested or monitored. Or she might’ve heard that survivors of Adumbrae encounters were shunned by their communities, due to the stigma of having been near such a monster—some people believe, though not backed by conclusive research, that being near an Adumbrae carries the risk of turning into one. It was probably the increased stress after an attack more than anything else.

Reasonable reactions.

But Hall couldn’t force himself to let this be. This Hartwell girl knows something about the mysterious woman who might be the fourth Adumbrae. There was something in Hartwell’s reaction that tripped off Hall’s police instincts honed over the years.

And I was right. A few hours ago, Hall went to Eloyce University to question Hartwell and settle the matter once and for all. If Hartwell continued to deny things, he would’ve dropped it. If she’d admit she was there and explain why she didn’t come forward, he would’ve accepted it. If there was truly nothing amiss, then his instincts had probably dulled with age.

But they didn’t. His instincts were as sharp as ever.

Waiting in his car outside Cresthorne College of Law, Hall saw Hartwell and the younger daughter of the Leska family—she was present at the memorial service, but he forgot her first name—get into an old van. Why would they do that? The most reasonable explanation was that they were buying illegal substances. Nothing too surprising from a socialite. But with Erind there, Hall wanted to see if there was something more to this.

Their destination appeared to be New Hope, the McHunters’ derelict ‘Mega City of the Future’.

What could they be doing there? Drugs? Something more sinister? Hall couldn’t follow them into the abandoned development because they’d pass an empty road; he’d be spotted. He chose to wait by the corner, leading to the only path to New Hope. He tucked his unmarked car in the slot between a boarded-up shop and a three-story building home to dust and spiders. He also draped a wide cloth made of rugged material over the hood of his car to make it look old, blending in with its surroundings.

From where he sat, he had a view of the skeletons of buildings in the distance.

“Mega Cities of the Future,” Hall muttered, remembering the platform of President Maynard after the BID was organized. “That was a crazy time…”

Fresh off the police academy, Hall started his duty in a world with three active Purple Blooms. The nearest was off the coast of Brazil, a real concern to Americans. Because of the stress, seeding rates rose, and Adumbrae popped off all over the US. There were fears that another Adumbrae war was about to begin, as the Hive began to awaken its Overseers from hibernation.

President Maynard had an idea, thought by many to be brilliant at that time, that Americans should live in clustered cities. Fit a lot of people in a small space by expanding upwards. Concentrating the population in specific areas meant an easier time for the brand-new super agents of the BID to watch over them. Less chances for an Adumbrae eating its fill of a town in the rural areas, gradually mutating into something more powerful, unnoticed and unknown to the authorities.

Hall recalled that his father was adamant about staying in their farmhouse. His mother, on the other hand, was deathly afraid of Adumbrae and wanted the family to move near a BID hub.

Fortunately, the Corebrings got everything under control, and a second Adumbrae War didn’t engulf the world. The Mega Cities program became mostly forgotten, though some states tried to continue it, like California, given its history with Adumbrae Titans during the Adumbrae War.   

It didn’t last long when the head of the McHunter family, the big man himself, Raphael McHunter, was executed for being an Adumbrae.

Hall didn’t follow the news after that. Last he heard, McHunters sitting in jail for aiding and abetting an Adumbrae were still appealing their convicted asses up to the Supreme Court. Lucky traitors to humanity didn’t get the death sentence—that was the extent they could twist the law with money. No amount could save a confirmed Adumbrae from execution. The McHunters outside of jail fought amongst themselves for a cut in the tasty pie, which was the estate of their grandfather, hastening the downfall of their crumbling empire.

He looked up at the peeling sign of the building to his right. It was hard to read it from this angle, but it should say ‘McHunters Charity Shelter’, one of their PR tactics at that time to influence public opinion in their favor.

If he remembered the layout of this area right, there was a food bank here, a free clinic on the other side—

A van was leaving New Hope!

Hall pulled himself out of his memories and scooted down his seat to hide from view. It was the same van that picked up Hartwell and Leska from Eloyce. “Blue hair,” he muttered, peering over the dashboard to observe the van’s driver. He didn’t get a good look at her earlier. Erind and Leska were also inside. He checked his notes to confirm he had jotted down the correct plate number.

Whatever they did at New Hope was over. They were safe. He didn’t need to follow them as they returned to the city proper.  

Fletcher. That was the surname of the driver. A student of Eloyce University. Ramello had pointed her out to him during the memorial service, saying that she lost her sister during the Adumbrae attack.

There was a page in Hall’s notebook with the heading ‘Kelsey Fletcher’. Ramello didn’t ask him to look for this Fletcher girl, a Cresthorne law student. 1L too, like his nephew. Hall took it upon himself to find out anything about Ramello’s friend. Her body was yet to be identified. Arranging the data on the casualties and the left-behind belongings scattered all over the trains and the station would take time to be comprehensible.

However, seeing the missing Fletcher girl’s sister with Hartwell was a definite alarm. Hall straightened on his seat as the puzzle pieces inside his head tried fitting together.

Could Kelsey Fletcher be… Red Hood, the fourth Adumbrae?

He flipped to the page on ‘Red Hood’, the mysterious Marsh Row killer. Last Wednesday, a couple of dead bodies were fished out of the river running around Marsh Row. They had ropes around them. Someone must’ve tied them to something heavy to stop them from floating. But the perpetrator was an amateur. The river’s current snapped the ropes, and the bodies were loose, floating down the river.

Both bodies had snapped necks. An odd cause of death. No gunshots. No stab wounds. Not even regular strangulation. Why did the murderer choose to violently snap their necks?

Hall checked the pictures of the bodies on his phone. One guy had his neck bones completely detached, his head flopping about like a rubber chicken. Ankles shattered. The second victim’s fatal injury was also inexplicable, his head forced to turn more than a hundred eighty degrees, as if someone forced him to mimic an owl. Spinal cord severed, causing instant death. No torture, other than the blow to the legs, but the methods of killing weren’t normal.

This was done either with the use of tools or by several men or… by someone with superstrength. An augmented human? Illegally augmented people frequented Marsh Row. Or an Adumbrae? The latter explanation wouldn’t have made sense before the Adumbrae attack, the least likely possibility. However, it was now forefront of Hall’s mind.

The victims might’ve had the worse of lucks running into an Adumbrae. An Unripe Manifestation would’ve left behind a messy crime scene. Bad news if there was a Complete Manifestation running around.

Even if the police couldn’t trace where the bodies were dropped, they managed to find people who recognized the victims. Their statements were that their friend followed a woman wearing a Red Hood. They hadn’t seen her since then.

A woman with superstrength. Fourth Adumbrae. Missing Kelsey Fletcher.

Were these puzzle pieces connected to other unsolved cases, like the spate of homeless people disappearing across La Esperanza? It was difficult to track them, but word on the street was that people suddenly disappear without a trace. Many of the disappearances happened at Marsh Row, connecting them to Red Hood.

What about the PCM? Some of the newer members say that their friends started to disappear, too. Five cases so far—two of these people were last seen in Marsh Row. There was something to that place. He’d go there tomorrow. It wouldn’t be a ‘solo jaunt’ because he’d be investigating the Marsh Row murders; he wouldn’t ditch Castan this time to keep Capt. Ward happy.  

“There’s something to… huh?” Hall ducked again as a clunky Mayfair Galleon with tinted windows came out of New Hope, following the route of the van. After that came a vintage motorcycle ridden by a thin man wearing a leather vest. He jotted down details about the car and the motorcycle, as well as the jacket design of the rider. It was clear that Hartwell, Leska, and the blue-haired Fletcher met with these people.

After they were out of sight, Hall started his car. He decided to follow the guy on the motorcycle. Either these young ones just wanted to take illicit substances in secret, or there was something more sinister going on. Only a few hours had passed, and they seemed to have their mental faculties intact. Their business inside New Hope was unlikely to be a drug session.

They were on the main road to the city, so he was confident he wouldn’t lose his target. Once they got into a populated area, Hall sped up to find the motorcycle.

The guy he was tailing eventually pulled up in a Phoenix Wings parking area. Hall stayed across the road, took out a small pair of binoculars, and watched the guy remove his helmet. Asian features. Korean? Japanese, maybe? Has a long ponytail.

Taking off his jacket, the man revealed that he wasn’t there to eat. He was an employee, wearing the signature Phoenix Wings orange uniform with a red flames design. The ponytailed man walked a few steps to the restaurant, stopped, and returned to his motorcycle. It was probably parked too close to the next motorcycle.

Hall’s eyes widened as the ponytailed man lifted his motorcycle, wheels off the ground, and set it back down, aligned with the others. Did I see that correctly, or was I hallucinating?

Comments

- Thanks for the help proofreading! - At least Erind knows the fourth Adumbrae might be Kelsey - Yeah, I feel like we lack worldbuilding in the original REND. - I've noticed that readers like side POVs if they contain reactions to Erind, and are connected to the main plot. That's what I'm practicing now. This is training to avoid the mistakes of the condo arc. - This is Reo not giving an f about the situation. There are hints that he regrets joining this thing, plus complaints about his job, etc. He's the danger to the group essentially. - Yes, we'll add a discussion like that. I've been meaning to add it, it's just that I don't have the time. I haven't even gotten around to making edits to 6.5 and 6.6 before that so I can gauge what their conversation would be in 7.2. - Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

Temple (REND)

That's Reo for you. And this is the risk the organization is willing to take. For sure, they've dealt with this before. And the girls at Eloyce probably didn't think much about it. They don't know anyone's watching them.

Temple (REND)

I just finished early so I thought to release it lol.

Temple (REND)

Thanks for your support!

Temple (REND)

Yep, I had this happen so we might have Hall investigate it so we can see how the organization reacts to this. This wouldn't be the first time something got exposed, I'm sure.

Temple (REND)

"If these videos were admitted as evidence, they would be cataloged, meaning there would be records. Their absence would be caught by a federal agent." Yeah, I think BID would take this super seriously. Videos of the Adumbrae attack going missing indicate that multiple folks higher up the chain are corrupt and compromised. Maybe include an internal investigation when BID takes over. "A survivor of an attack would be praised as a hero in normal circumstances or at least supported (in the real world), e.g., a survivor of a terrorist attack." Wouldn't the survivor of an Adumbrae attack have a high chance of becoming an Adumbrae themselves? "This logic is really flawed. Highly-populated areas are not easier to watch." That depends on the tech involved. If you have Adumbrae detectors in multiple places, and folks are being actively monitored, a city is better than the outskirts for Adumbrae safety. China is a good example, mass surveillance reduced the crime rate in China. "Since he has been a cop for many years, he should have a professional deformation and think of Erind as a person of interest or even a suspect, and not empathize with her." She should be a person of interest like every other survivor. The missing Adumbrae is likely to be Kelsey, and the other Adumbraes were all killed. Unless he thinks she is part of the org that arranged this, she should not be a suspect. If Kelsey is found not to be an Adumbrae, then Erind is a suspect, along with the rest of the survivors. "time to call a backup, possible Adumbae sighting in a populated area." Agreed, this should be changed. His actions should be something a strong human is capable of for the cop to keep track of him but not call backup. "As a cop, he should be analyzing more." Agreed, but he should be biased in drawing conclusions. He seems to have an interest in Adumbrae, so it's likely for him to assume the suspect is an Adumbrae. I think the BID should investigate survivors. There is no guarantee that they are innocent.

Danger Mittens

Why did you change the title convention? Also, there are now too many chapters from non-Erind's perspective. That kinda diverts the focus from her. "What if I report the missing videos to the BID? Hall was sure several pieces of evidence of the Adumbrae attack had gone missing in the past few days. They were there before. He had reviewed them. Now, they were gone. The reasons he'd been getting ranged from they had already been transferred to the BID to that he was hallucinating about them." - If these videos were admitted as evidence, they would be cataloged, meaning there would be records. Their absence would be caught by a federal agent. Immediately, people who say this evidence never existed become prime suspects. "Or she might've heard that survivors of Adumbrae encounters were shunned by their communities, due to the stigma of having been near such a monster." - this needs more explanation. A survivor of an attack would be praised as a hero in normal circumstances or at least supported (in the real world), e.g., a survivor of a terrorist attack. Since this diverts from normality, I suggest adding an explanation. "Innocent reasons." -> Resobale. Or smth like a "reasonable reaction." The phrase "innocent reasons" makes very little sense in English. "This Hartwell girl knows something about the mysterious woman who might be the fourth Adumbrae. There was something in Hartwell's reaction that tripped off Hall's police instincts honed over the years." - Since he has been a cop for many years, he should have a professional deformation and think of Erind as a person of interest or even a suspect, and not empathize with her. "Why would they do that? Under normal circumstances, the Leska girl, particularly, wouldn't have ridden such a shoddy vehicle given her status. Under normal circumstances." - They are buying weed/drugs off somebody; that is the immediate theory. He should think of at least a couple of alternative explanations for their behavior, given his experience. "Concentrating the population in specific areas meant an easier time for the brand-new super agents of the BID to watch over them." - This logic is really flawed. Highly-populated areas are not easier to watch. It is too many people, harder to observe and notice patterns, easier for criminals to hide. More potential targets for criminals. Also, more stress (which increases the risk of seeding) and more victims in case of emergency. "She didn't seem to be among the dead, which was good news. The bad news was that there was no trace of her. Odd, but nothing that set off alarms." - Is he a cop or an idiot? A female student vanishes during the Adumbrae attack but is not listed as dead? That should be a giant alarm bell going off. At the same time, there are reports of a female Adumbrae showing up. "mimic an oil" -> owl "Spine cord severed, causing instant death. What kind of sadistic criminal would do this? Hall guessed a personal motive or a particularly malicious person." - As a cop, he should be analyzing more. For example, this was a very brutal person, not normal strength, so... augmented? or Adumbrae? But Adumbrae would likely leave a giant mess behind and not care about hiding the bodies. The death was quick, with no toying or torturing, so maybe a hit or a random kill by someone powerful. Maybe they witnessed something or crossed somebody's path. Who are these guys, and why were they found together? What is a connection? "These people, whoever they were, may know something about Red Hood." - So far, there is no connection between Red Hood and the subway attack, so he should not focus on Red Hood. The people he is watching are related to the subway attack. "Hall's eyes widened as the ponytailed man lifted his motorcycle, wheels off the ground, and set it back down, aligned with the others." - time to call a backup, possible Adumbae sighting in a populated area. As I mentioned earlier, there are a bit too many chapters focusing on minor characters. However, the Tower cop could be a good "third person" for this arc. I advise editing this chapter and adding more details because a police officer would notice them. For example, what was Erind and Deen wearing? What was the color and model of the van? Motorcycle? What was the exact time? These would be the notes a cop would take when observing people of interest or suspects.

Karp Paul

I think I'm going to start doing any commentary or proposed corrections in a reply to my original comment or a new comment entirely. I keep ending up having to edit my original comment a lot to shove stuff in.

Vaporus

And she was so proud of herself when there was no mention of it on the news. :(

Vaporus

Excellent writing, good stuff! Hall took a deep breath. The captain was wrong—this wasn’t connected to that incident—but he didn’t want to argue about it. He sat there, clearing his mind of his mistake years ago. There was no repaying that. And he had learned a valuable lesson of investigating thoroughly before accusing. -> Em dashes! I like seeing those, good usage. Need to either combine the last two sentences or remove the And. Possibly 'about investigating' instead of 'of investigating'. What could they be doing there? Drugs? Something more sinister? Hall couldn’t follow them into the abandoned development because they’d pass an empty road; he’d be spotted. He chose to wait by the corner, heading to the only path to New Hope. He tucked his unmarked car in the slot between a boarded-up shop and a three-story building home to dust and spiders. He also draped a wide cloth made of rugged material over the hood of his car to make it old, blending in with its surroundings. -> He draped a wide cloth over his car to make it old?... look old maybe? -> also not sure 'heading to the only path' works best maybe use leading? I think it can work either way they mean basically the same thing but for me heading seems more like he's going that way where leading is more the road goes that way? I had to look up the difference.. apparently heading is more direction of travel 'heading east' leading is more where it ends 'leading to the path'. I dunno the sentece to me reads like he's stopped on the corner but also going on the path and I think you mean he's stopped at the corner and the corner ends up on the path further down. Both bodies had snapped necks. An odd cause of death. No gunshots. No stab wounds. Not even regular strangulation. Why did the murderer choose to violently snap their necks? Hall checked the pictures of the bodies on his phone. One guy had his neck bones completely detached, his head flopping about like a rubber chicken. The second victim’s fatal injury was also inexplicable, his head forced to turn more than a hundred eighty degrees, as if someone forced him to mimic an oil. Spine cord severed, causing instant death. What kind of sadistic criminal would do this? Hall guessed a personal motive or a particularly malicious person. -> I feel the shattered leg or legs need mentioned. As I've said before I'm not so much punctuation focused when reading and am quite willing to gloss over the odd plot hole but word usage makes a big difference to me...

Vaporus

Typos: ‘McHunters Charity Shelter -> ‘McHunters Charity Shelter' The second victim’s fatal injury was also inexplicable, his head forced to turn more than a hundred eighty degrees, as if someone forced him to mimic an oil. Spine cord severed, causing instant death. -> The second victim’s fatal injury was also inexplicable, his head forced to turn more than a hundred eighty degrees, as if someone forced him to mimic an owl. Spinal cord severed, causing instant death. ----- But Hall couldn’t force himself to let this be. This Hartwell girl knows something about the mysterious woman who might be the fourth Adumbrae. -> Funnily enough, not really. The Mega Cities program became mostly forgotten, though some states tried to continue it, like California, given its history with Adumbrae Titans during the Adumbrae War. -> Nice to see some more worldbuilding here. As well as some familiar lore too with the McHunters. Their statements were that their friend followed a woman wearing a Red Hood. They hadn’t seen her since then. -> I'm sure they'll see her soon! What kind of sadistic criminal would do this? Hall guessed a personal motive or a particularly malicious person. -> This was actually self defense lol. Although, it is cool to see it other characters' reaction to Erind. Also, poor Kelsey getting blamed for Erind. Hall’s eyes widened as the ponytailed man lifted his motorcycle, wheels off the ground, and set it back down, aligned with the others. -> Oh no! Reo's using superstrength in public. I think this is quite early, and only Deen used superstrength in public in the Old Version's 4.2/4.3. But she had an emotional reaction to saving Julie. And she's lucky to have her Guardian Angel. A bit weird to have Reo doing it. Especially since he's afraid of dying? He wouldn't want to expose himself in public. And I think it's like the middle of the day too, not at night. An explanation later would be nice. Perhaps Dario needs to have a conversation about super strength in public. You have no idea who might be watching... Some edits and additions to chapters 8 and 9, like more security for the truck. I also clarified the group's aims in attacking the docks -> Cool! I would suggest maybe adding some dialogue between Erind / Deen in 7.2 discussing how they're kind of trapped into this. And what are their options. Karp mentioned this in the giant comment chain in the previous chapter that Erind and Deen are kind of coerced into taking the Cores and just accept it. In my opinion, I think it's fine for them to be coerced because from Erind and Deen's POV, they are just 'regular humans' who can't really overpower Dario. And then they don't report it either because the BID could track them down (their anonymous tip lines could be not so anonymous after all), and they also aren't suicidal enough to risk this. But I agree with Karp they should have a discussion about this. Maybe weigh the pros and cons. And then they are resigned to this fate. Besides, the 2M's are worse people. Erind could say some cheesy line about how "The enemy that's fighting my enemy is my friend." And Deen could correct her and say the saying is "The enemy of my enemy is my friend." Maybe ExD readers can comment below on what they think of it for the new patrons. -> It was cool since it blended some character development for Erind and Deen into some romantic moments. And the smut really paid off. I would say the main difference between the previous version of REND and the Erind x Deen spinoff is that Deen is horny in the spinoff. And that's what mainly starts the plot going and sets up the romance. Thanks for the chapter!

OmniHumanist

Reo, you absolute fool. You could've just rolled it... given that Hall's found out, he'll either be silenced or get recruited later. Can't wait to see what happens.

hyakkiyak0

Also poor Erind got lied to by movies, she thought the bodies would stay hidden lol

TheHornedOne

Interesting

Brian Pierce

😑Using super strength in public to move your motorcycle a bit is…. Not smart. I guess this is what happens when you secretly give superpowers to civilians. Unless he got it on camera Tower won’t be able to prove it though, but this will make sure he investigates them more. Getting in the Van right out of college also wasn’t the best play, but it makes sense since Blank is the only one who seems like he might be properly trained for this

TheHornedOne

Ooh, earlier chap than normal?

TheHornedOne


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