Knicker Knight

Fantastic Shags and Where to Find Them Part 1 (Harry Potter/Queenie Goldstein)

Queenie Goldstein was starting to think she made a mistake. There was a good chance she’d made a lot of them actually. So many mistakes, in fact, that there was no way she could recover from them all.

Nurmengard Castle wasn’t what she imagined. The work Grindlewald gave her wasn’t what she thought it would be, either. She knew he’d use her Legilimency, because it was her only true...

Weekly One-shot Poll (2/26(28)/25)

No joke, I just totally forgot to put the oneshot poll up for this week. My bad people. Here it is now, and you've got until Tuesday at midnight to cast your votes.

Growth Spurt Chapter 45

“So THIS is why you kids keep disappearing!” Mrs. Weasley said. “This whole time… This whole ENTIRE time…”

Harry winced. He wondered what would happen. Would she get so mad she threw him out? It was possible. Mrs. Weasley was ordinarily very kind, sometimes too kind, but she could also get very angry and worked up. This was her daughter Harry had been banging… and it was obv...

Growth Spurt: Chapter 44

“I thought the OWL was going to be harder, to be honest,” Hermione said.

“I agree. I thought they would at least get into Countermotion Charms,” said Pansy. “Flitwick had already covered everything needed. That was the easiest O I’ve ever gotten.”

“Wasn’t it just?” Hermione said.

“Harry?” Ginny said.

She had returned that morning from Luna’s hou...

Growth Spurt: Chapter 43

This was it. Even more than when Hermione and Ron were first pulled away by prefect duties, leaving Harry to ride the train without them for the first time, THIS was the most awkward trip Harry had ever had on the Hogwarts Express.

He looked around the cabin. Pansy was to his right, huddling between him and the window. Ginny was on his left, sitting uncomfortably close, and was probably t...

Susan's Submission (Harry Potter Commission)

Susan Bones had a major problem, and it all stemmed from her perfect boyfriend. He hadn’t done anything. The problem was actually about what he WOULDN’T do.

They had been dating for two whole years now. It all started when Harry came back for another year at Hogwarts, finishing his education after missing a whole year to take down Voldemort. Susan chose to come back as well, along wit...

Smashing a Spider Part 4

“You kids behave yourselves alright?”

Mayday Parker gave Peter a big nod, while her younger brother Benjamin sniffled.

“Aw, come on, Benjy.” Peter went down on his knee, rubbing his son's back. “It’s only a camp. I’ll be picking you up before you know it.”

“I wanted Mommy to take us,” Benjamin said.

“Mommy wishes she could have. But she’s working ...

Smashing a Spider Part 3

“Thaaat’s right folks! Who can you trust if not J. Jonah Jameson, and THIS news anchor is telling you right now, wake up! Spider-Man is a menace! He’s ruining the safety of our streets! He’s ruining the appeal of our lovely city! And mark my words, he’s not done yet. There’s nothing he can’t ruin!”

“Don’t you ever get tired, Jonah?” Peter asked. 

Of course...

Hoekage Chapter 3

“Shizuneeeee!” Naruto said. “Stop hitting me! I yield! Yield!”

The blond boy had his arms raised while he cowered behind them. Shizune, meanwhile, had her pillow raised, delivering brutal blows with it.

Why was she doing this, behaving like a child at a sleepover? It was because she didn’t know what else to do. She was feeling too many things that she barely understood, ha...

Weekly One-shot Poll (2/19/25)

Vote on which pairing you would like to see me write next week.

Previous Winner: Peter Parker/Darcy Lewis Continued

Growth Spurt Chapter 42

Harry awoke to a warm, wet, and heavenly feeling in his crotch.

He blinked his eyes open, feeling invigorated instead of tired. He shifted in bed, raising his hips up reflexively while reaching down. He saw the blanket laid over him had been shifted, while a single girl huddled between his legs, her short pink hair bobbing up and down as she sucked on his massive dick.

“Hey, Tonks...

Growth Spurt Chapter 41

This one is basically two days worth of chapters rolled into one. I'd love for all my chapters to be more like this length, but to keep them daily, I have to keep them shorter for now.

Harry’s instincts took over quickly, as soon as he realized Draco was going to curse him. He recognized the motion of the blond boy’s wand.

“Crucio!” Draco said.

Unfortunately for...

Announcement: No Chapter Today; Double-Length One Tomorrow

Hey guys. The next chapter of Growth Spurt is a big one, both for plot and "plot". I've been working on it all day today, but it's going to come out as about twice the length of a normal chapter, so I need an extra day to get it finished. It'll go up tomorrow!

Hoekage Chapter 2

Sorry about the late post. I got behind.

“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear Naruto!”

Sitting at a table inside an inn near the border of Fire Country, a handsome blond grinned, sitting behind a birthday cake that had eighteen lit candles stuck into its surface. Around the table, at least thirty other identical blonds were horsing around and...

Deal With the Devils Part 2 (Harry/Rias/Akeno/Fleur)

Silverware tapped against plates as four people sat around a table, eating a nutritious breakfast.

“The eggs are perfect, as usual,” Fleur said.

“Thanks, Dear,” Harry said. 

Fleur leaned over, pecking his cheek. Her breath smelled of scrambled eggs, coffee, and cum.

Akeno and Rias watched this exchange, both of them wrapped in bathrobes, still looking slight...

Deal With the Devils Part 1 (Harry/Rias/Akeno/Fleur)

At least once a year, ever since Harry married his gorgeous half veela wife, someone would joke that he “Must have made a deal with the devil to land that one!”

It didn’t make all that much sense to Harry. He was well aware of what a catch he had on his hands. But at the same time, he knew that Fleur Delacour's standards were not impossibly high. She just wanted a wizard who was goo...

Weekly One-shot Poll (2/12/25)

Vote on which pairing you would like to see me write next week.

Previous Winner: Harry/Rias/Akeno/Fleur (Harry Potter/High School DxD)

Growth Spurt Chapter 40

“Vacation!” Seamus Finnegan screamed, pumping his fists high into the air.

“Five points from Gryffindor!” Professor McGonagall rebuked him from the staff table. “It is too early for such nonsense.”

Seamus didn’t look upset. He just pulled large helpings of bacon and breakfast potatoes onto his plate and dug in. Even the other Gryffindors were in a good mood, except Her...

No Chapter Today

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but there won't be a chapter today. I was going to post a commission today, but it strayed a bit close to Terms of Service, and I don't want to give Patreon an excuse to F me over.

Growth Spurt will be back on Wednesday along with a new Weekly Oneshots poll.

Smashing a Spider Part 2 (MCU)

Darcy Lewis was smart.

She thought that people forgot this a lot, an account of her generally goofy personality, but her brain was actually extremely sharp. Darcy had also spent a significant amount of time around, let’s say, enhanced individuals.

She saw all the ways Thor was just different from a human. She’d gotten well acquainted with the limits that humans had, and the bein...

Smashing a Spider Part 1 (MCU)

Darcy Lewis didn’t enjoy the guest speaking parts of her job one bit.

It was worked into the contract of her last research deal. She thought that astrophysicists would dou, y' know, astrophysics stuff. Science, and experiments! She didn’t really imagine herself giving lectures to college kids.

It was boring. And annoying. And to top it all off, the horny little menaces never lea...

Growth Spurt Chapter 39

The day of the fateful match between Ravenclaw and Gryffindor was not much nicer than that dreary, stormy evening had been.

It wasn’t wet, at least. There was that. But it was frigidly cold, enough to bite into their skin when the players walked onto the field, let alone when they mounted their brooms and flew around in preparation. 

Harry took a deep breath. A cloud formed i...

Growth Spurt Chapter 38

Exams for the end of the first term were approaching fast, and you could feel it all over Hogwarts. It wouldn’t be too long before Christmas Holidays came around, and everyone was gearing up for the mad rush that would precede it.

Perhaps that was why, with tensions already running high, it was all boiling over tonight.

“You didn’t reserve the field!” screamed Katie Bell, he...

Weekly One-shot Poll (2/5/25)

Vote on which pairing you would like to see me write next week.

Previous Winner: Peter Parker/Darcy Lewis... By tie-breaker. The votes were exactly the same for the Gravity Falls prompt, but I gave it to the MCU one because that one finished runner-up so many times before.

Hoekage Chapter 1

In an alternate universe Jiraiya manned up and chose to raise his godson, challenges be damned. He teaches Naruto everything that he knows, from information gathering, to ninjutsu, to women. When he returns home after his 18th birthday, Naruto is ready to take the leaf by storm. He'll be the best Hoekage ever!

No, he didn't misspeak. Hoekage, because what good is being the villag...

Humbling Cordelia (Buffy Commission)

After Xander suddenly grows into a new power, he wastes no time in putting it to use bringing Cordelia down a peg.

Growth Spurt Chapter 37

One week later on the dot, Harry was climbing the Astronomy Tower again, this time with a different book in hand. He was determined to be more careful with this one. The dueling book he brought to the last detention session had ended up partially ruined after Romilda squirted on its pages. Harry had to tell Madam Pince that he spilled a drink on it; a single spell got rid of the damage, but the...

Growth Spurt Chapter 36

Harry checked his favorite book out from the library—a book about dueling that, although it didn’t have any spells, gave plenty of tips and tricks—and began the arduous climb up the Astronomy tower.

It was late, already evening, but he’d actually never been up there so early. Since Astronomy classes were held in the middle of the night, he’d never had any reason to. But he wasn�...

Just Ask Part 2 (Harry Potter/Romilda Vane)

Romilda had always been a girl who was confident in her looks. She didn’t think this was arrogance. She was just good to look at and always had been. No, she had never felt ugly in her life, until now.

It wasn’t that she was in a bad state. In fact, she’d never done her makeup this carefully before, and her hair was braided perfectly. She wore a red dress that was cut quite low, lea...

Just Ask Part 1 (Harry Potter/Romilda Vane)

Patreon took down this post again after like 30 minutes. I've put it up in PDF and EPub below. If you have trouble accessing these, please just leave me a message, and I can find a way to get you the story.